#changesneedtobemade

whole.lotta.news

My soul hurts...today a friend asked me had I heard about another unarmed black man being murdered by an officer . I told her I had early this morning and I cried. She told me that she no longer even felt anything. It had just become a common thing to her.......#ineverwanttobenumb #blacklivesmatter #justice #accountability #prayers #iloveblackmen #america #changesneedtobemade

Just wanted to take a moment of silence for not only Christina Grimme but for the people who have recently died in Orlando Florida. You guys are in my prayers an I swear your lives didn't die in vain. Your legacies/memories will live on forever!!! 🌈🌈🌈🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻 #inthistogether #pride #onlyhuman #hopesandprayers #changesneedtobemade #gonebutneverforgotten

...there are times when I wish I was or allowed myself to be super close to someone again. You know, tell them what is going on with me, trust them with my deepest thoughts, inner cravings, disappointments, share adventures and tales of my colorful life with, etc. But sadly I am too detached and I have been this way for over a decade. I just won't allow myself to get too close to anyone or share intricate parts of myself. I want to change this, I do. However, there are times when I honestly "attempt" to do so with an individual I undeniably mesh with "at first". Then, I am always proven right (meaning; they always prove to be the opposite of what I thought), so then, like I always do, I cut them loose and keep on with my life. Maybe, just maybe, I'm too stuck in my ways or not willing to give people a chance to show me otherwise. I just honestly believe if someone does something once then eventually that same fraudulent action will be done again. I just crave a soul that is kindred to mine and I can finally, well again, indulge myself in an amazing platonic kinship. I believe God and the universe are working some magic. I just have to do my part, recognize, and at least try. What is the worst that can happen? There could be someone I am overlooking now. Who knows, but for now I am extremely detached and a lot of people point that out to me. I don't like emotions or being open. It may be due to some areas from my past.

It's been a minute, but a minute was all I need. All along the solution was under my nose, I could've avoided all this bs and been taken that opportunity to better myself. Now its about me and noone else. Now I feel like is the time to be selfish and do what I know I'd be better off with. I just hope that if its possible, every thing well sail smoothly. *Fingers crossed*