#champclark

Song by Taj Mahal

Robert Johnson

Acrylic on found board

STUCK

By champ clark

  copyright 2014

  LIGHTS UP

  A wedding reception.  Phillip, a guest, sits at an otherwise unoccupied table nursing a glass of water.  A woman approaches the table.

TESS

Hey, there…

(Phillip neither reacts nor responds.  The woman sits.)

Good to see you again, Phillip.

(No response.)

You look well.

(No response.  They sit in silence.)

Ok.

(She stands to leave.)

PHILLIP

Your little girl is beautiful.

TESS

Oh!  Thank you, Phillip.  Thank you so much for saying that.  She is, isn’t she?

(She sits back down.)

 PHILLIP

Yes, she really is.

(Long silence.)

You broke my fucking heart, you know.

TESS

Please, Phillip…I just came over to say hello.

PHILLIP

No, please listen.  You did.  It still hurts.  I know you don’t like to be responsible for how I feel.  You made that clear a long time ago.  But, you know, fuck that!  I think about you every day.  I think about you every night.  I think about you all the time.  I have for years now.  And I still can’t stop.  I’ve tried.  I really have tried.  I tried so hard it nearly killed me.  Sometimes a person can have a deep and lasting effect on another person’s heart and you can’t always control that.  You just can’t.

TESS

I never let you think there was anything between us. You know that.  I was always honest with you about that.

PHILLIP

Yes.  We were friends, though.

TESS

We were friends.

PHILLIP

But you just cut me off.  So completely.  I thought I’d never see you again.  You don’t do that to a friend.  That was cold-hearted, Tess.  I never could have imagined you were so cold-hearted.

 TESS

Stop it.  Stop it right now.  Or I’ll get up and leave.

 PHILLIP

I know, I know.  I hardly knew you.  That any “relationship” there might have been consisted of one dance, a few conversations shared, mutual friends, some emails and…one kiss.  One very short kiss before you pulled away.  But I think about that kiss all the time, Tess.  Every day I wonder whether you liked it or were repulsed by it or, most likely, felt nothing.  I wish I knew.  But I don’t want to know.  I never planned to fall in love with you, Tess.  It just happened.  That night we danced at Frank and Josie’s wedding and the music got slow and it was a beautiful summer night and…oh, God damnit!  Fuck it!  It felt so wonderful to suddenly be in love.  You were…are…just so, so beautiful.  You want to hear something funny?  Something hilarious?  I thought I’d found my soul mate.  My soul mate.  And I deluded myself into thinking that maybe…despite all the obstacles…somehow, some way, you might love me back.

TESS

I had a boyfriend.  Someone I loved.

PHILLIP

God, do I understand what a fucking idiot I was over you?  And a fucking pain in the ass, too?

TESS

Gently.)

Yes…you were.

PHILLIP

Yeah…Jesus…wow.

(They share a small laugh at this.)

TESS

Listen to me, Phillip.  I once asked you to release me from your thoughts.  That was a long time ago.  Now I’m asking you again.  Release me.  You’ll feel better.  You will.  I have a different life now.  I am with the man I intend to be with for the rest of my life.  I have a little girl.  I’m working.  It’s working.  Things are good for me.  Are they good for you?  What are your joys, Phillip?  What are your blessings?  Count them.  Multiply them.  Wield your own power.  Create your happiness.  You’ve been walking against the great wave of sadness most of your life.  So, make a change.  Get out of the ocean and walk along side it.  Or jump into the wave and ride it out.  But stop fighting the same fight that has exhausted you.  See the beauty of your time here.  You have a daughter, too.  Don’t you find happiness in her?

PHILLIP

Yes, of course.  I would have cashed it in a long time ago if it weren’t for Jenny.  But I could never do that to her.  I couldn’t leave her that legacy.  Otherwise…well, you’re right…I’m tired.  Just so tired.

TESS

I’m sorry, Phillip.  I really am.

PHILLIP

I would like to be friends again.

TESS

I don’t think that’s a good idea.  No…

PHILLIP

Ok.

TESS

I’m going to leave now.

PHILLIP

Hold my hand.

TESS

Phillip…

PHILLIP

Please, hold my hand, just for a minute.

(Tess slowly reaches over and puts her hand on top of Phillip’s.  They sit quietly for a few moments.  Vittorio enters.)

VITTORIO

(To Tess)

There you are.

 (Tess keeps her hand on Phillip’s.)

 Hon, do you have the diapers?  She needs a change.

TESS

Vittorio, this is my friend Phillip.

(Phillip stands to shake hands.)

VITTORIO

(With friendliness)

Phillip!  Wow, it’s so nice to meet you.  You’re something of a legend around our house.

PHILLIP

(With a self-effacing laugh)

Yes, that’s me…the living legend.

TESS

(To Vittorio)

It’s time for her feeding.  I’ll come with you.  Goodbye, Phillip.  I’ll see you around, ok?

PHILLIP

Sure.  Goodbye, Tess.

VITTORIO

Nice to have finally met you.

(Tess and Vittorio exit.  Phillip sits back down at the table.  He looks up and eventually signals a server.)

PHILLIP

Excuse me…please, could I have a glass of red wine?

  LIGHTS DOWN

  LIGHTS UP

  A wedding reception.  Phillip sits by himself at an otherwise unoccupied table nursing a glass of wine.  He is wearing a beret.  Tess approaches.

 TESS

Hey, there.  This seat taken?

PHILLIP

By you.

(Tess sits)

TESS

Bello cappello.  (Nice hat.)

PHILLIP

Ha!  Thanks.  A bad hair day.  You speak Italian.

TESS

Working on it.  My boyfriend is Italian.  I met him at a wedding.

PHILLIP

You look quite lovely tonight.

TESS

Oh, thank you.  That’s such a gentlemanly thing to say.

PHILLIP

That’s me.  “The perfect gentleman.”

(Putting out his hand)

My name’s Phillip.

(Tess puts out her hand)

TESS

Tess.

(They shake)

PHILLIP

(Indicating the bride and groom)

They look happy.  I’m not sure I really like weddings much…though you might change my thoughts on that.  I do believe marriage is a noble endeavor.

TESS

You’re not married, yes?

PHILLIP

Yes, I mean, no, I mean, twice.

TESS

Twice?

PHILLIP

Yes.  Excuse me, but if you’re not married, which I assume is the case since you have a boyfriend, why do you wear a ring on your wedding finger?

TESS

You noticed.  A lot of men don’t.  Anyway…

PHILLIP

Never mind.  None of my business.

TESS

Twice?

PHILLIP

Yep, twice.  Though I wasn’t in love with the first one.

TESS

Then why did you marry her?

PHILLIP

Oh, man…I was really, really young.  Nineteen.  I was in college and I fell in love with one of my teachers.  Crazy in love.  Professor Donagough.  Katie Donagough.  She was about 20 years older than me and had three kids…the oldest was almost my age.  She knew I loved her.  I told her.  But she didn’t love me back.  I don’t know.  I don’t know.  I never did sleep with her.  I did kiss her once.  Just once.  Anyway, I went kind of crazy.  For three years.  Really crazy.  I’d never had that happen to me before…or since.  That kind of insane, obsessive romantic love for someone.  I mean, I’ve been in love since, but not that way.  The funny thing is that I recently re-connected with Katie on Facebook.  She’s like 70 now.  Shit.  Still teaching.  I told her how I was so madly in love with her.  She wrote back a nice email apologizing, telling me she didn’t know.  That she’d been really busy at that time in her life.  And she didn’t know.  How could she not know?  Three years!  Kind of blew my mind.

TESS

Wow.  And the marriage?

PHILLIP

(Laughs)

Oh, yeah.  So I dropped out of school and got married to someone I didn’t even like.  Couldn’t stand her.  Just to spite Katie Donagough.  What’s that saying…”To cut off your nose to spite your face?”  I cut off my head.  And I was married for twelve years…my entire twenties.  Man, would I like to have those years back!

TESS

When was this?

PHILLIP

Oh…1974, ’75

(Tess laughs)

PHILLIP

What?  What?

TESS

I wasn’t even born yet!

PHILLIP

(Mock offended)

Hey, I’m old…but I ain’t dead.

(Pause)

And you, have you ever been married?

TESS

Yes…but just once.

PHILLIP

And?

TESS

It ended.

PHILLIP

Why?

TESS

I wasn’t happy.

(Pause)

Why do you look so sad?  I’ve been watching you over here and you look so sad.

PHILLIP

Ha!  I guess I just kind of always look that way.  And, well, it’s because I am sad.  Not for any particular reason.  I’ve always been like this.  I was born like this.  Genetic, I think.  My Celtic ancestry, maybe.  But I like to have a good time, too.

 (Pause)

TESS

Ok…then wanna dance?

PHILLIP

I don’t dance…but I thought you’d never ask.

Phillip holds Tess’ hand and they enter the dance floor.  An up-tempo song has been playing, but as soon as they arrive it turns slow.  Phillip takes Tess in his arms and they begin to slow dance.  After a moment, she puts her head on his shoulder.  They continue to dance.

  LIGHTS DOWN

  LIGHTS UP

  Santa Monica Pier.  Tess and Phillip stand looking out over the water.  They are holding hands.

  PHILLIP

It’s really pretty, isn’t it?  Look at that little sliver of a moon.

  TESS

It is pretty.

PHILLIP

I’ve had a nice time with you tonight, Tess.

TESS

Me, too.  With you.

PHILLIP

I like being with you.  I like talking with you.  I like holding hands.  It makes me happy.

TESS

Yes?

PHILLIP

Yes.

(They are silent)

PHILLIP

What are you thinking?

TESS

Oh…

PHILLIP

Do you mind my asking?

TESS

No.  I don’t mind.  I was just thinking about something my sister Jeannie said to me today.  We were at the store with her little girl, Cailey.  And Cailey asked me to buy her an ice cream.  I started to pay for it, but then Jeannie stopped me.  Cailey hadn’t napped yet and my sister didn’t want her having sugar before her nap.  Jeannie said to me, “If you have children you’ll do the same.”

PHILLIP

I’m not sure I understand…

TESS

If you have children.  Not when but if.  People always used to say to me “when” you have children.  But recently it’s become “if.”

PHILLIP

Oh.  Do you want children, Tess?

TESS

I did with Tom.  We would have had beautiful children.  Tom had this caramel colored skin and the most soulful eyes.  Those would have been beautiful kids.

PHILLIP

What happened, Tess?

TESS

He did drugs.  He couldn’t stop.  And he was so afraid I’d leave him.  He’d tell me he couldn’t live without me.  He’d cry and beg me not to ever leave him.  That if I ever stopped loving him he would die.  And I believed him.  I stayed.  But he kept doing drugs.  Finally…I left.

(Pause)

Our kids would have been beautiful.

PHILLIP

Tess…I’m in love with you.

TESS

Oh!

They move closer and begin to kiss each other.  Then, suddenly, Tess pulls away from the kiss, but not from Phillip.

TESS

I can’t.

PHILLIP

Why?

TESS

I can’t.  Vittorio is coming tomorrow.

PHILLIP

Tess!  I love you, Tess.  I love you.

He kisses her neck.  Kisses her arms.  Kisses the palms of her hands.  Tess breaks off from the embrace.

TESS

I’m going to go now, Phillip.

PHILLIP

I’m crazy about you, Tess!

TESS

I’m crazy about you, too.

(Tess leaves)

  LIGHTS DOWN

  LIGHTS UP

  Inside Jack’s apartment.  Phillip is sitting in a chair with a towel draped over his shirt.  Jack stands behind him cutting his hair.  They keep an eye on the television.

JACK

Fuckin’ Bears.

PHILLIP

They really suck.

JACK

(With a pronounced Chicago accent)

Oughta bring back Tomczak.

PHILLIP

(Laughing)

How’s your Pa?

JACK

Ok, I guess.  It was nice to see him.  We were doing some repairs on his RV, though, and I noticed that he was huffing and puffing.  And I realized he’d gotten old.  Made me kind of sad to see.

PHILLIP

Your dad’s a good guy.

JACK

Yeah, the best.

PHILLIP

So…we kissed.

JACK

Alright, my man!

PHILLIP

We really kissed.

JACK

That’s great!

PHILLIP

And I told her that I loved her.

JACK

Ooops.

PHILLIP

But I really do.

JACK

That’s ok, then.

PHILLIP

But it was kind of short…the kiss.  She broke it off and started talking about her boyfriend.  Vittorio.

JACK

Hmmm.  Maybe she was feeling guilty.

PHILLIP

He was coming into town today.

JACK

I know.

PHILLIP

You know?

JACK

Yeah, I heard Tess telling Sarah about it the other night.  Said he…

PHILLIP

Vittorio…

JACK

Yeah…anyway, Sarah asked her what he looked like and Tess said like “The Most Interesting Man In the World…but younger.”

PHILLIP

Fuck me.

JACK

Which probably just means he has a beard.

PHILLIP

Fuck me.  I hate him.

JACK

Now, now.

PHILLIP

I love her, Jack.  I really do.  I’m not sure how it happened.  But it was a real kiss.  I know it was…I think.

JACK

I’m sure it was.

PHILLIP

I kind of made a fool of myself, though.

JACK

That’s what we do.

(Pause)

Scoot a little to the right.

PHILLIP

I don’t know.  I’m really confused.  It was a real kiss.

JACK

Look…he’s a lot younger than you, he’s probably got more money than you.  She probably wants kids.

PHILLIP

She does.

JACK

See?

PHILLIP

I know I’m fucking twenty-one years older than she is, that my heart is bad, that I’m broke, that it would be wrong for me to have any more kids…but I’d have children with Tess.  I would.  I really would.

JACK

Not your call.

PHILLIP

I know.

(Jack takes the towel from around Phillip’s neck)

JACK

Done.

PHILLIP

Thanks, pal.

(Jack starts trembling).

JACK

When they see this cut it’s going to be a fucking puss quake.

  LIGHTS DOWN

  LIGHTS UP

  Late at night inside Phillip’s apartment.  Music plays on an old portable turntable.  Phillip toasts Tess with a glass of wine.

PHILLIP

Happy birthday, Tess.  I hope you had a nice time tonight.  Did you enjoy the play?

TESS

Oh, yes, thanks, Phillip…the play was fantastic.

PHILLIP

Wasn’t it?  But it was fucking sad, though.

TESS

Didn’t you see me bawling?

PHILLIP

I got a bit teary-eyed a few times myself.

TESS

And, God, thank you for those flowers!  That was the most beautiful bouquet I’ve ever received.

(Pause)

What is this music?

PHILLIP

It’s Art Tatum.  Isn’t he great?

TESS

I love it!  And the turntable!

PHILLIP

Ha…yeah…well, it’s not like it’s my original turntable from when I was a kid in the 1930’s or anything.  I actually got it at Target last year.

TESS

That’s one of the things I like about you.  I mean, look at your place?  Ukuleles, accordions, all these books and records…have you read all these books?

PHILLIP

Yeah, most of them.  Over there are my favorites…The Great Gatsby, Tender Is The Night, How Green Was My Valley.  Have you ever read that, Tess?  Oh, man, it’s so beautiful.  I wanted to name Jenny “Bronwyn” after the main character in the book.  I mean, about five pages into it I was crazy in love with her.  But her mom and all my sisters hated the name, so…Jenny it was.  And it fits her now.

TESS

I’d like to meet her.  I think I’d like her.

PHILLIP

You would.  She’s an amazing kid.  I’m not sure how that happened considering her mom and me.  Some recessive genes, I guess.

TESS

Yes, I like your place.  It reminds me of when I lived in New Orleans.  But what’s with that ventriloquist’s dummy over there on the shelf?  Kind of gives me the creeps.

PHILLIP

(Laughing)

Figure.

TESS

Huh?

PHILLIP

Ventriloquist’s figure.  Ventriloquist guys get mad if you call them dummies.  The strangest thing, one night I was sound asleep in the other room when I heard this loud thump.  It woke me up.  I came in here and there he was lying on the floor.  He’d fallen off the shelf.  His head was cracked open.  It was like he’d tried to commit suicide or something.  I tried to put him back together, but he really doesn’t work anymore.

TESS

Oh, my!

(Addressing the dummy)

Well, hello, Sir.  I certainly hope that you are feeling better.  Was it love?

Phillip has gone to his record collection, a large dusty pile in the corner.  He pulls out a record—one that is an odd size, smaller than your normal lp.  He busies himself with changing records.

PHILLIP

Hey, have you ever heard this one?  It’s Sinatra.  But listen to it on this little turntable.  That’s the way it’s meant to be listened to.  I mean, when Sinatra hit it big back in the 40’s…and when this record was made…it’s not like people had high-tech stereo systems with big fuck speakers and stuff.  They just had these little hi-fi’s like this.  And the first time they put Sinatra, or Bing Crosby or any of those crooner guys on, it was like, mother-fucker!!!  Because before that male singers had these little high and tight voices.  Eunuchs.  But Crosby and then old Blue Eyes…they had the blues and they had the balls to swing them.  You could hear it in their voices.  That had never been heard on record by a white guy before.  And these little hi-fi’s are how people first heard them.  So, that’s why I like to listen to stuff on this instead of on cd or iTunes.

Phillip turns back to Tess.  She has picked up a light blanket and is now sitting in a chair, shoes off, feet pulled under her, the blanket wrapped around her shoulders.  She is staring intensely at Phillip.  Phillip is at a loss for words.

PHILLIP

(Finally)

Do you like night trains, Tess?

TESS

(Laughing)

Night trains?

PHILLIP

Yes.

TESS

I’m not sure I’ve ever thought about it…but…well…no, I guess I don’t like night trains.

PHILLIP

I mean the sound of them, Tess.  The sound of them going by in the night.  Why not?

TESS

They make me sad.  They make me feel all alone in the world.

PHILLIP

No!  No!  It’s a beautiful sound, Tess.  When I was a kid we used to go visit my great aunt in Virginia.  She lived in this big old house that had a farm.  And these train tracks ran right through the farm.  When I was a kid I could never get to sleep at night.  I used to wet my bed, too.  But when I’d visit my aunt, like, at three in the morning all of a sudden you’d hear this train going by down the tracks.  It’s the most beautiful sound.  I’d hear it and know that there was something alive out there in the night.  And the funny thing, Tess, is that…I heard a train go by last night.  But there aren’t any night trains in L.A.  Maybe it was a ghost train?

TESS

I don’t know.

(Silence)

I’d better go, Phillip.  It’s late.

PHILLIP

Oh…ok.

TESS

I love the flowers.

PHILLIP

Sure, Tess.  Thanks for coming over.

TESS

You’re a beautiful man.

PHILLIP

Wait, Tess…take this.

Phillip turns to his bookshelf and pulls down his copy of How Green Was My Valley.  He gives it to Tess.

PHILLIP

This is for you, Tess.  A birthday gift.  It’s a first-edition.  And it’s my favorite book.  I want you to have it.

TESS

Oh, thank you, Phillip.  Thank you.  I can’t wait to read it.

PHILLIP

Tell me what you think of it, Tess.

TESS

I will.

They hug.  Tess exits.

  LIGHTS DOWN

  LIGHTS UP

  A Thai restaurant.

PHILLIP

The sake is good.

TESS

(Sipping)

Mmmm.

PHILLIP

It seemed like you were gone forever, Tess.

TESS

Just five weeks.

PHILLIP

A long five weeks.  I missed you.

            (Pause)

And you had a good time?

TESS

Great time.

PHILLIP

Good, I’m glad.  Did you like Italy?

TESS

Loved it.  It’s so beautiful.  Vittorio took me all over.  God, that guy likes to walk!

(Pause)

It’s the longest we ever spent together.  It kind of worked out really well.

PHILLIP

He’s a lucky man, Tess.

TESS

Oh, thank you.

Phillip pushes a plate with two fortune cookies on it to Tess.

PHILLIP

Fortune?

Tess opens her cookie.

PHILLIP

And it says?

TESS

“You will be successful.”  Ha, I’m working on it.  How about yours?

PHILLIP

“You will come into great wealth.”  Damn!

TESS

What?

PHILLIP

I’m looking for love.

(After a pause)

TESS

We’re getting married, Phillip.

 (After a pause)

PHILLIP

Ok.

TESS

And I’m moving away.

PHILLIP

Ok.

TESS

My visit was kind of a test run.

PHILLIP

Ok.

TESS

Don’t tell anyone yet.  I just wanted you to know first.

 (They sit in silence.)

TESS

Still want to play pool tonight?

PHILLIP

No, I don’t think so.

(Pause)

God damn it, Tess…you’re the only girl I ever knew who has her own pool cue.

(Pause)

Marry me, Tess!

TESS

Phillip…

PHILLIP

Ok.

(Pause)

Are we still going to be friends?

TESS

I’m getting married, Phillip, but I’m not giving up my friends.  I’ve told Vittorio all about you.

PHILLIP

Ok, Tess.  Ok.  Congratulations.  I’m really happy for you.  I really am.

TESS

Oh, thank you, Phillip.  Thank you.  That means so much to me for you to say.  It does.

(Pause)                       

Do you want your book back?  I haven’t had a chance to read it yet.  But I know it’s a first-edition.

PHILLIP

(Truly offended)

What?  No…of course not.  It’s yours.  I gave it to you.

(Pause) 

Phillip reaches out to hold Tess’ hand.  She reciprocates

PHILLIP

Will you still read the book?

  LIGHTS DOWN

  LIGHTS UP

  Stage left: Phillip’s apartment.  Phillip sits at a table looking grimly at his computer. 

Center stage:  Tess and Vittorio.  They are facing each other holding hands.

Phillip taps on his keyboard.

Tess and Vittorio embrace and kiss.  It is their wedding ceremony.

Phillip taps on his keyboard again.

Tess and Vittorio embrace and kiss.

Phillip taps on his keyboard.

Tess and Vittorio embrace and kiss.

Phillip taps on his keyboard.

Tess and Vittorio embrace and kiss.

Phillip taps on his keyboard.

Tess and Vittorio embrace and kiss.

Phillip taps on his keyboard.

Tess and Vittorio embrace and kiss.

Phillip taps on his keyboard.

Tess and Vittorio embrace and kiss.

PHILLIP

Oh, God!

  LIGHTS DOWN

  LIGHTS UP

  Phillip is outside smoking a cigarette.  He is staring at his cell phone.  After a long while he dials a number he knows by heart.

Light up on Tess in her apartment.  She is nursing her baby.

Tess’ phone rings.  She can’t get to it before the ringing stops.

Phillip doesn’t leave a message and puts his phone into his pocket.

Tess picks up her phone and looks at the calling number.  She hits return call.

Phillip’s phone rings in his pocket.  He almost jumps out of his shoes.  He fumbles for the phone, finally getting it to his ear.

PHILLIP

 Hello…

TESS

Hello?  Someone from this number just called?

(Pause)

PHILLIP

Tess…it’s Phillip.

TESS

I’m sorry…

PHILLIP

Phillip.  It’s Phillip.

TESS

Oh, Phillip?

PHILLIP

I’d lost your phone number and just came across it and thought I would give you a call.  It’s good to hear your voice, Tess.

TESS

How are you, Phillip?

PHILLIP

Good, good…good.  How are you, Tess?

TESS

I’m good.

(Pause)

I have a baby now…a little girl.  Actually…

PHILLIP

I know, I heard.  Wow!  Tess, that’s just great.

TESS

Phillip…

PHILLIP

Tess…I heard a night train tonight.  So…that’s really why I called.  Remember when we talked about the night train that time?  Do you remember?  Now, every time I hear one go by I think of you.

TESS

Yes, I remember.

PHILLIP

You do?

(Pause)

Hey, do you ever come out this way?

TESS

I don’t see that happening for a while.

PHILLIP

Because it would be so great to see you.

TESS

Phillip…

PHILLIP

I’d really like to see you again, Tess.

TESS

This isn’t the best time for me to talk, Phillip.

PHILLIP

Oh.  Sure.  Of course.  Tess…do you ever think of me?

TESS

Yes, Phillip…I do.  From time to time.

PHILLIP

Oh, ok…it’s great to hear your voice, Tess.  Well…I guess…I just wanted to give you a call.

TESS

Goodbye, Phillip.

PHILLIP

Can I call again sometime?

TESS

Let me go, Phillip.  You have to let me go.

PHILLIP

Oh, ok.  Goodbye, Tess.

(Silence)

Phillip hangs up the phone.  Tess hangs up the phone.

  LIGHTS DOWN

  LIGHTS UP

  Inside Phillip’s apartment.  A table with a computer on it.  And an almost empty bottle of wine…or two.  Phillip has been drinking.  He is fumbling about connecting a small microphone on a stand to his computer.  Then he clicks the keyboard and begins to speak into the microphone.

PHILLIP

Beautiful Tess…the last time I heard from you, you said you would not write to me anymore.  And that if I were to write you, you would not write me back.  I did and you haven’t.  So, I do not expect to hear back from you now.  But it’s been so long and I have been thinking of you so much lately.  And wondering how you are.  And hoping that you are happy.  And thriving.  Are you still in Toronto?  Or perhaps you are in Italy now.  I just don’t know.  I should ask about Vittorio, but, to be honest, that is difficult for me.  But I’m contacting you because of something that happened today.  I hadn’t been there in a long, long time, but I was on the beach in Santa Monica and decided to go for a long walk.  It was a beautiful late afternoon.  I walked the beach for about a half hour and before I knew it I was at the pier.  So I took a stroll down it until I reached the very end.  By that time it had started to get dark and the moon had come out over the water.  And I remembered the night we kissed.  Or maybe I just kissed you.  I’ve never known for sure.  I stood there for a long, long time, though.  I missed being with you.  I missed talking to you.  I missed being your friend.  It all seems so long ago.  Finally, I turned around and walked back to my car.  When I got home I started to drink some.  I’ve been drinking way more than I should these past years.  And I’m drinking tonight.  I’ve tried to stop a couple of times.  I’ve even gone to AA.  But, when it comes down to it, drinking is about the only time I feel just a little bit alive these days.  Anyway, I’ve taken up a new hobby…writing songs…something I never thought I could do or even tried to do.  But in the past year I’ve come up with about fifty of them.  All of them are about you.  I hope you don’t mind my saying this.  Being on the pier today, and thinking about you, made me write another one.  Number fifty-one.  I don’t know if it’s any good, but it is heartfelt.  I will send it to you here, Tess.  I hope you will accept this communication.  Because, technically it is not an email or a letter.  So maybe you will listen.  I still love you, Tess.  I miss you, Tess.  Here’s the song.  Sorry for my voice.

Phillip picks up his ukulele and sings:

  I walk the street

Where I walked the street

In anticipation of seeing you

  And I haunt the haunts

That I used to haunt

When it was you I tried to woo

  Now I kiss the air

Because your lips aren’t there

And I search for the smile

That drove me wild

  Still yearn for the touch

I wished for so much

Since that time I first loved you.

  LIGHTS DOWN

  LIGHTS UP

  The office of Phillip’s therapist.

PHILLIP

It’s really nice out today.

THERAPIST

Yes.

(Long uncomfortable silence)

PHILLIP

I really don’t have much to talk about.

(Long uncomfortable silence)

PHILLIP

Same old thing.  Smoking too much…drinking too much…work…

(Long, long uncomfortable silence)

THERAPIST

What are you thinking?

PHILLIP

I think I’m going crazy.

THERAPIST

Why?

PHILLIP

I hesitate to bring her up again…I know it’s all I ever talk about…but…Tess.

THERAPIST

Ok.

PHILLIP

I wrote her last night.  And I had vowed I would never contact her again.  She asked me not to.

(Pause)

But I wrote her this.

Phillip pulls out his phone and reads from it.

PHILLIP

“Oh man…I’m so sorry, Tess.  I just can’t help myself.  But signing off now…for good…for all time…forever…so, so sorry.  Pathetic, I am.  No, I am not going to do harm to myself.  Not that it matters.  But I could never do that because of Jenny.  Though I do think about it.  Every day.  But signing off.  I just can’t help myself in writing this one last time.  To say…I hope you are so happy in your life.  Yes…happy, happy, happy.  So sad in mine, though.  The last time we saw each other, you concluded with…”I’ll see you around.”  Of course, that will never happen.  How?...When?...Where?...Never!  And you knew that when you said it.  And I knew that when I heard it.  Why did you say that?  You are gone.  Gone..gone..gone..gone.  I know I have been a royal pain in the ass.  And ridiculous.  PATHETIC!  RIDICULOUS!!!  That is my fate and role in life now, much as I would wish it differently.  No more, though.  I write here for the last…last…last time.  Keep well and thrive.”

Phillip puts his phone down.

PHILLIP

That’s crazy.

THERAPIST

A little.

PHILLIP

Maybe she never had any feeling for me at all.

THERAPIST

Yes, maybe she didn’t.  That’s a possibility.

Phillip begins to cry.

THERAPIST

Are you suicidal?

PHILLIP

I think about it.

THERAPIST

Have you made any plans?

PHILLIP

No.

THERAPIST

Ok.

(Pause)

I’m going to recommend a book to you.

PHILLIP

Ok.

THERAPIST

It’s by Graham Greene.  It’s called The End of the Affair.  I think you will find a lot in it.

PHILLIP

Thank you.

THERAPIST

There’s a passage in it that applies to our work here.  It says, “The next best thing to talking to her is talking about her.”  I’m not really sure that’s a healthy thing, Phillip.  In fact, I don’t think it is.  But if it makes you feel better you can talk to me about Tess all you want.  Until you run dry.

PHILLIP

I’ll never run dry.

  LIGHTS DOWN

  LIGHTS UP

  Jack in his apartment stage left.  Phillip in his apartment stage right.  Jack dials his phone.  Phillip’s phone rings.  Phillip answers.

PHILLIP

McGarrett…

JACK

Boss, it’s Dano.  My car broke down…

 (They both chuckle at this familiar exchange)

PHILLIP

Hey.

JACK

Hey, pal, how you doing?

PHILLIP

I’m ok, I guess.  How are you?

JACK

I’m alright.  I saw Sadie last night.  We went and had dinner down the street.

PHILLIP

Oh, yeah?  Did she contact you?  How did it go?

JACK

It went ok.  Yeah, we’d been emailing a bit recently.  Nothing much.  I’d see something that made me kind of laugh and I’d send it to her.  She’s still beautiful.  Kind of made me fall in love with her all over again.  She came back to my place afterwards.  Didn’t screw or anything.  We just lay there and held each other for a while.  It was nice.

PHILLIP

I always thought you guys were a good pair.

JACK

Hey, um…

PHILLIP

What’s up?

JACK

This is kind of awkward…but I got a call from Tess the other day.

PHILLIP

Oh.

JACK

She says you’ve been bothering her…emails and stuff.

(Silence)

PHILLIP

I have.

JACK

She wants you to stop.

PHILLIP

Ok.

JACK

She doesn’t want to hear from you again.

PHILLIP

Ok.

(Long silence)

JACK

You ok, pal?

PHILLIP

No.

JACK

She wasn’t screaming or anything.  She just wants you to stop.

PHILLIP

No, I understand.  She’s right.

JACK

You ok?

PHILLIP

I’m just so embarrassed.

JACK

Come on…

PHILLIP

And ashamed.

JACK

What about that other girl?  The one you knew in school?  You said she might be coming out for a visit?

PHILLIP

Yeah, at the end of the month.

JACK

See her.

PHILLIP

I will.

JACK

I’m sorry, pal.

PHILLIP

No, that’s ok.  It’s not you.  It’s me.

JACK

Want to get together tonight?  I can give Jimmy a call?

PHILLIP

No.

JACK

What are you going to do?

PHILLIP

I’m just going to sleep.

JACK

Come on.

PHILLIP

No.

JACK

Ok…watch the sauce, ok?

PHILLIP

Yeah, no, I’m just going to go to sleep.

JACK

Forget about her, ok.  She doesn't deserve you.  (pause)  I’ll give you a call later just to check up.

PHILLIP

Ok, if I don’t answer it’s just because I’m asleep.

JACK

Ok…love you.

PHILLIP

Love you, too.

  LIGHTS DOWN

  LIGHTS UP

  Phillip’s apartment.  Phillip is curled up on the floor, asleep.  There are several empty wine bottles about. 

Tess enters and quietly walks to Phillip.  Tess kneels and gently kisses Phillip on the forehead.  She exits.  Phillip wakes up.

PHILLIP

Tess?  Tess?

  LIGHTS DOWN

  LIGHTS UP

  Inside a funeral home.  There is an urn on a cloth-covered table.  Phillip’s beret is jauntily set atop the urn.  Jack sits in a chair by the door.  Tess enters but doesn’t see Jack.  She slowly starts to approach the urn.

JACK

Tess?

TESS

(Startled)

Jack!

Jack and Tess hug.

TESS

Oh, Jack.  I’m so sorry.  I got here when I could.  I had the kids.

JACK

No worry.  Nice to see you, Tess.

TESS

Where is everyone?

JACK

They’ve left.  I was just hanging here for a while longer.  I thought he might want the company.

TESS

I guess I’ll see them all tomorrow.

JACK

Maybe not, Tess.

TESS

What?

JACK

He didn’t want you at the funeral.  He told me that before the surgery.  He kind of guessed he wouldn’t make it.  I was going to call you, but, well…I figured it was something you could decided for yourself.  But that’s what he said.

TESS

Oh, Jack.

JACK

Come on.

Jack and Tess approach the urn together.

TESS

What happened?

JACK

His ticker.  He always knew that’s the way he’d go.

(Pause)

At least he still had his hair.

Jack and Tess stand in silence for a moment.  Then Jack begins to laugh.

TESS

What?

JACK

There’s something inherently funny about staring at an urn.

 (Tess laughs, too.  They laugh together)

JACK

Poor motherfuck.

(Silence)

Tess?

TESS

Yes?

JACK

Tess…before he went in for the surgery…he got this…this tattoo.

TESS

I don’t understand.

JACK

Your name, Tess, your name…etched above the heart.  Above his fucking heart!

TESS

Oh!

(Tess starts to quietly cry)

JACK

Did you ever love him, Tess?

(Tess doesn’t respond)

Even a little?

(Tess doesn’t respond)

Tess?

TESS

God damn you, Jack.  God damn you.

LIGHTS DOWN

LIGHTS SLOWLY UP

We return to the wedding reception where Tess and Phillip first meet.  They are still slow dancing.  Tess still has her head on Phillip’s shoulder.  Phillip has just fallen in love.

LIGHTS SLOWLY DOWN

Available at Amazon and other fine booksellers.

http://www.amazon.com/Shuffling-To-Ignominy-Tragedy-Fetchit/dp/0595371256/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1408804108&sr=8-y

Hojo the Hobo

With champ clark