#ch2 event

All he had to do was burn them.

Easy, in theory. Just a motion of his hands, gripping the contents of his letter, moving them the scant few feet to the open flames of the stove. Then, letting go, and letting the fire take them, burn the paper and its contents to ash, and as they flickered up in smoke, he could forget all about what was in them. Put it, put temptation, out of his mind. Simple. It would take only a moment, and all he had to do was fucking drop them in--

Harley stood in the kitchen, alone, by the open flame. It had been burning for several minutes, now, and the room was beginning to become uncomfortably warm, the chemical-sweet smell of gas and heat invading the space, but the sweat that dropped down his brow had nothing to do with the temperature. 

He just--

His eyes kept being drawn back. Back to the pictures, the words, back to the handwritten addenda on the back of one of the postcards. Flame to paper, paper to flame, and it shouldn’t have been as difficult as it was to make up his mind, but it was. 

“Jesus.” he breathed, to himself, and his fingers twitched towards the fire, his brow creasing, and if he just threw them in now, right now, just do it, do it, do it--

The cabin door slid open behind him, whisper-quiet, and Harley swore under his breath, snapped off the gas and hastily gathered the papers. He folded them in half, inelegantly, and crammed them into the pocket of his jeans, whirling around to face the intruder, and all of his lackadaisy and languid was gone, replaced by startled eyes, rigid shoulders, animal tension.

For a heartbeat, and then it was gone, exorcised from him in one long breath, his eyes closing. He unclenched his fist in his pocket and drew his hands out, now empty, and offered the newcomer a hollow smile.

You don't remember the last time you had peaceful rest. The sounds, the visions, the feeling of something creeping up on you has made it difficult to exist. As much as you know it is only illusions caused by the gasses Doki and Kira keep pumping into the air, there's a part of you that feels it's all real.

But then you wake up.

It's a hazy, heavy feeling of relief as you blink to awake. Maybe you're actually in your bed or maybe you find yourself somewhere you're surprised by. Who knows when you fell asleep but now you wake up and you can feel yourself breathe pure, untainted air. There's no sound, no monster in the shadows, no unnerving feeling to be felt. 

You're fully awake and fully alive.

That's right. 

You're alive.