#ch four

                That’s what Jeremy told himself as he drunk himself into a stupor that night. With no cell phone, he couldn’t be summoned by Fox for the verbal beating he knew he would eventually have to face. He could seclude himself in his apartment and emerge whenever he felt like showing his shamed face in public again. As far as he knew, the story of that day would never cease to be the talk of Los Angeles, and quite possibly the entire nation.

                The hitman didn’t show up that night to be his angel of mercy. Nor did he show up the next night. Jeremy remained secluded in his apartment for forty-eight hours before re-joining the world of the living, and not once did anyone come by. He wore sunglasses and an out-of-place cowboy hat when he ventured outside, horribly hung over and not too keen on being recognized at that moment. But he still heard the hushed gossip. The only way he’d have any sort of anonymity was if he cut that hair of his. That, however, was out of the question.

                Shiloh startled him once again that morning, this time perched on top of the fence that surrounded his school. His shoes lay discarded on the sidewalk and his bare feet were dangling beside Jeremy’s head as he passed. The CEO didn’t even notice the boy until he spoke up.

                “Good morning! Why’re you wearing that funny hat?”

                “Shouldn’t you be in school?”

                “It’s Saturday, silly.”

                Jeremy looked around, neglecting to take off his sunglasses. “Then why are you at school?”

                “You pass by here on your way to…wherever it is you go. Work? I have nothing better to do so I wait for you here.”

                “I haven’t been to work in days.”

                “I know.” Shiloh looked down. “It was pretty boring. But I like watching the people. And no one’s told me I can’t hang out here yet. The weather’s nice, too.”

                Jeremy had no way of knowing Shiloh had been waiting for him, but it didn’t stop him from feeling a little guilty. “You shouldn’t waste your time like that. It’s Saturday, you should be out having fun. Fun isn’t waiting to see this loser in passing.”

                “Why do you say that?”

                “Don’t you like any sports?”

                “No, I mean the part about you being a loser. I don’t think you’re a loser. You stuck up for me!”

                “Anyone would have done that. Trust me, I’m not someone you want to identify with. Go make some friends who are more worth your time.”

                Shiloh twisted his mouth. “Everyone in my class thinks I’m weird.”

                Jeremy laughed in response. “That’s because you don’t take care of your crazy hair. If you’re gonna grow it long, you have to make sure it’s taken care of. Otherwise, what’s the point?” He took off the cowboy hat, and despite his hat-hair, the blonde locks glistened in the morning sun. Not a hair was out of place, even with Jeremy in this disoriented state.

                “But you just tie it up. That’s boring.”

                “And you look like Tarzan.”

                Shiloh jumped down with cat-like grace, his bare feet barely making a sound as they hit the cracked pavement. “I do not. I just like it long. Mom doesn’t make me cut it very often so I just…don’t.”

                “You still have to take care of it.” Jeremy put his hat back on before shoving his hands in his pockets. “Anyway, buddy, I really have to get to work now. I have some things I’ve been putting off that I need to take care of ASAP.”

                “What’s ASAP? Can I come with you?”

                “What? Why would you want to come to work with me? It’s Saturday. Go play, you crazy kid.”

                “Where do you work? Maybe I can help!”

                Jeremy, thinking of the coming storm that was his confrontation with Fox, smiled cynically and shook his head. “No, you can’t help with this kind of work. I work over at the American News Corporation. ANC.”

                “American News Corporation, your only source for the latest breaking news,” Shiloh said. Jeremy simply laughed. “Yeah, that’s the one.”

                “That’s so cool! Do you get to be on TV?”

                “No. I work behind a desk. It’s more boring than school, I promise.”

                “Mom says that there used to be other news companies. Why is there only ANC now?”

                “The others went out of business.”

                “Why?”

                “I bet you drive your teachers crazy with all your questions, Shiloh. Are you ever gonna let me go?”

                “Can I come? Please?”

                “Today I have to take care of some things that I’d rather you…not see.” He lowered his voice and leaned in closer. “I’m gonna get yelled at.”

                Shiloh nodded wisely. “Ohhhh. I get it. Okay. Can I come some other time though?”

                “Sure.”

                “Promise?”                 “Yeah.”

                “Pinky swear?”

                “What?”

                Shiloh held out his pinky with a stern expression that struck him as oddly familiar. With a sigh, Jeremy hooked his own pinky in and the two shook to their agreement. As he parted ways with Shiloh, he realized he was once again turning his back on the only person who genuinely desired his presence.

--

                “You know, Jeremy, I’m not going to ask what possessed you to go down there. I’m not even going to ask why you thought you could come off as anything but a jackass on camera. You don’t just waltz into places like that expecting those people to think and reason like rational human beings. They don’t use logic like we do.” Fox tapped his forehead, failing to look up over the glowing touch-screen of his tablet. Only Fox could make appointments and berate a man to death at the same time. “But that’s beside the point. You’ve managed to tarnish your public image in the space of an hour. I do believe that’s a new record, Jeremy. I hope you’re proud.”

                “You’re not as…wound up as I thought you’d be, Fox.” Jeremy smiled nervously.

                “You’d like that, wouldn’t you? That’s what this was all about, wasn’t it? Hoping that I’d rage myself into incapacitation?”

                “I think you’ve lost it, Fox.”

                “Your mistake was thinking that I was as stupid as you.” The news anchor reached into his pocket and produced a small bottle of pills. “As long as I’m taking these, I’m just fine and dandy.” He turned the bottle in his fingers for a few moments before placing it back into his pocket. “Modern medicine is a wonder, isn’t it?”

                Jeremy rolled his eyes and folded his arms across his chest. “You have no idea why I went. I’m more complex than you think. Maybe I have interests outside of managing this stupid corporation.”

                “The way I see it, you either went to piss me off or you went to see the pretty doctor. That’s about as deep as you get, Jeremy.”

                “Maybe I wanted to report on something again. Maybe I wanted to take part in actual journalism for the first time since Rodney dragged me out of it.”

                “You’re no journalist. You don’t know the first thing about it.”

                “What, and you do? All you do is spout off your opinion. You’re not informing the public of anything. You’re just telling them what to think about things.”

                “This is America, Jeremy. The people can choose whether or not to heed my wisdom. And you’re one to talk about throwing around opinions—you got slapped doing just that, you dumbass.”

                “The people don’t have a choice. You’re the only face they see on TV.”

                “What, feeling socially responsible all of the sudden? Sorry to say, but you’re a little too late. You can’t do shit when everyone hates you. All you can do is what I tell you to do. That’s how it’s going to be until I retire or you die.”

                “Or you die.”

                “Oh, Jeremy, I highly doubt that’s going to happen any time soon.”

                “Who knows, Fox? You have more enemies than I do. Maybe someone will pay to have it done.”

                “Well, you’d better hurry up with that, because the man I hired works quickly.”

                Jeremy sputtered. “Did you just—“

                “So? So what? Where’s your proof? By the time you actually get something together to take to the police—something that won’t get you laughed at—you’ll have a bullet lodged in your skull.” Fox began to laugh, shaking his head. “You’ve got no hope. If I were you I’d either get your affairs in order or flee the country. You do have a chance if you do the latter—it costs extra for him to chase you across the border and I don’t plan to pay him for it. As long as you distance yourself he won’t go after you.” He shrugged. “Maybe you can go find some hippie friends and change the world. I’ve just opened up a world of possibilities for you.”

                Jeremy turned his back to Fox, at a loss of words. The news anchor continued speaking, but Jeremy didn’t hear any more of it. His head was spinning, and he couldn’t find the strength to move from his spot. There had to be something he could do. There was no way he was trapped. He was one of the most powerful men in the world—he owned the only news corporation, for Christ’s sake! But no matter which way he thought about it, there was no way out. He was going to have to high-tail it and leave as quickly as possible if he was going to see the passing of the new year. His chest heaved as he descended into panic, but after a few minutes, he managed to calm himself down enough to speak.

                “You’re going to regret this Fox.” Jeremy didn’t know exactly how as of that moment, but he was going to make it true. “You’re going to regret ever tangling with me. This is war.”

                Fox covered his face in his hands and erupted into a wheezy fit of laughs. He never did say anything in response; he simply laughed until Jeremy got fed up and left the office. He spat defiantly once he was outside the door. Let him laugh. It was all going to catch up with him eventually. Jeremy Malone was a force to be reckoned with.

--

                He didn’t try and conceal his identity on the way home. Despite it being November, the sun was still unrelenting and it was too hot to wear a hat. The walk home was surreal. The feeling of empowerment was beginning to wear off, and it left Jeremy shaken and paranoid. He tried his best to keep his concentration on the sidewalk before him, to keep his gait straight and his pace steady, but he found that it was difficult to keep his balance. He needed the alcohol to wear off. He needed to sleep. He needed to find safety.  

                Shiloh wasn’t outside of the school. It seemed that he’d moved on. Good for him. It wasn’t healthy to wait so long for someone who wasn’t worth anything. The boy soon appeared in the distance, however. On the other side of the street, he was wrapped up in talking to an older boy—a teenager, from the looks of it. He had the same sandy, curly hair and the same splash of freckles on his face. Jeremy slowed his gait as he observed the two; Shiloh didn’t seem aware of his presence, and Jeremy wasn’t about to call attention to himself. The two were laughing together, obviously having a good conversation, but the older boy’s voice sounded strained. All of the sudden, the teenager snapped his head up at Jeremy, who immediately looked back down at the pavement. Caught staring. How embarrassing. In his hurry to get away, he didn’t notice Shiloh waving enthusiastically at him. That had probably been Shiloh’s older brother he’d spoken about on the day that they met. Jeremy didn’t spend too much time on that thought before his mind changed gears.

                There was no place to go besides home, but home wasn’t safe. He had no choice, really, unless he wanted to inhabit someone else’s apartment at a party. But at a party he’d inevitably let down his defenses. That wouldn’t be good. For now, he had to be as sober as humanly possible. He couldn’t afford the failure of his alertness.

                “Heh,” he thought aloud. This was the first time that attending a party wasn’t the more appealing option in an internal dispute.

                So Jeremy returned home and locked himself inside. He got on his computer to check his messages, but despite his lack of a cell phone, no one had really tried to contact him. He thought briefly about sending a nasty email to Fox, but that wouldn’t have done him a lot of good. His thoughts then turned to Vera, for whatever reason. He pulled up the Mercy Clinic’s webpage, and sure enough her email was at the very bottom of the front page, but he had no idea how he’d go about verbalizing the thoughts that were running through his mind. He was sorry in a way that didn’t include the desire to take back his statements. Jeremy believed what he believed, but he was perceptive enough to understand that he’d acted stupidly at the clinic. No apology would be accepted, however, and he knew that. An anonymous donation also crossed his mind, but that was pointless too, as the place was going to be closed down without a steady source of funds anyway. He’d really screwed them, hadn’t he? The realization of this made the uneasiness in his gut increase tenfold. Vera had a very impractical way of viewing the world, but all she wanted to do was help.