#certex

Event Ten (The Last)

Texon’s POV

“...Take this ring as a sign of my undying love.. as the night changes, my feelings just stay the same.. To have and to hold.. for richer or for poorer.. ‘til we reach forever.. my love will just be the same...”

My heart aches as I’m about to finish my plan. I love her. With all that I am, with all that I have. I will never hurt her.. ‘cuz hurting her is like punishing myself.. But now.. I know I’m gonna make her cry. But it’s for her own good. I can still remember how her mom went to me and beg to let her go. Her mom is convincing her to go to Spain to study architecture because she only wanted the best for her daughter. But I want her to stay. I’m begging the heavens that she would choose me. But, I chose for her. I just woke up realizing that love is all about sacrifice... that I’m too selfish to not give her the best! Her mom wants her only the best! As I am! I want only the best for her.. I remember when we used to stay up late at the school backyard to feel the air and dream with her.. We have dreams.. To live. To grow. Together. But.. I know, it will last. Everything between us will last. But I was sure then. That I will only love her. and if God won’t permit, I know I’m gonna live alone. Die alone. with her in my heart.. I don’t want to let her go but if letting her go means giving her the best, then I will. 

I lied that I forgot her. How can I forgot someone so important? How can I forgot someone I only laid my eyes on? How can I forget someone I’ve ever loved? I planned the whole accident thing... I planned that I forgot her. To make her go. to let her go and pursue her dreams. I felt like I’m the only barrier to her dreams.. But look at her now, successful and happy. How can I come back now? How can I tell the whole truth? How can I tell her that I love her to death? 

Event Nine

Cerina’s POV

I was holding his right hand tightly like all my fears of losing him again crept inside me. I was dumbfounded. Just a while ago I was decided to let him go, to let my feelings all go but right I was holding onto him like I can’t move on. I love him. That’s the surest thing I’ve known in my life. And I seriously think that I can’t love again if it’s not him. From the day I vowed to love him for the rest of our lives until now, as the night changes, my feelings stay the same. 

His eyes open quietly. I hugged him. I also called the doctor to check his status. I wonder where his family? Where is his girlfriend? Steph? I wonder why I am here. I know I have to tell them. I have to have the courage to tell them. But after I’ve known his status. The doctor said that he got into a minor car accident last night and hit his head slightly. I just talked with the doctor and he said that Texon is now stable. I’m relieved. I know I have to call his parents. As I’m about to go outside, he called me. wait, by our endearment? 

“Love.” 

I was so dead until he called me. I was so dead until he called me by our endearment. Like all my anger and hatred had just faded and all was remained is love and passion. How can I still love him despite of making me suffer? Wait, he remembers now? I’m confused. 

“I’m sorry, love. Sorry. I remember you.. Always. Never been forgotten.”

Event Two

Cerina’s POV

3 years ago

Event One

Cerina’s POV

Event Eight

Cerina’s POV

I’m holding this box full of photos and letters that we once shared, that we once glanced, and I once treasured. But now, I’m willing to let it all go. I love him. Still. Holding this feels so torture to me. How can these pieces of sheets bring so much memories? A tear fell like the past just happened yesterday. I know I have to let this go. I know, I have to let go of what’s keeping me from moving on. I know I have to let him go. Will he be happy? because if he is, then I’m willing to let go. I’m willing to give up for my love and never look back. If this takes him to be better and have a good life then I’m willing to let him go. Even if it breaks me. Hurt me. I am letting him go... I knelt down and pray.

Lord,

Now, that he is free, I hope that he will be happy. I hope that I end this through he will be totally happy. Even this will hurt me. Even this will make me crazy. Because I love him and I vowed that I will love him forever. I may not be able to love again, but I’m happy that he is the last man I’d ever love. He is worth it. I just hope that I get this through. Give me strength to hold on and still love him from away. It may hurt not to see him near, but I know I need this. He is my world. There’s no regret making him one, I’m happy. He’s making me happy.. but sad at the same time. I realized that love isn’t about happiness or sadness or having both, it’s about making you feel alive. I’m alive.. All these years of following him.. All these years of loving him from a far.. Now, I can say I’m living and not just merely existing.

Event Seven

Cerina’s POV

Yesterday was so full to me. At the start, I was happy looking for all the arts surrounding the whole exhibit but hours later I was crying hard.. because of that man. because of the man I poured my heart out but eventually crashed it.. the man I thought I’ll spend the rest of my life... the man I’ve ever loved but hurt me in the end.. The end. I was clearly on my mind yesterday when I said I have to move on. I know this is for me. I know this is for the better. Because I also realized that maybe, this is really what God wants.. this is really what Texon wants.. That this is our destiny. To grow apart...

3 years ago

“Love.. I may go far. But this is for our future.. after a year, I will get you here and we’ll live in London. For good. and I’ll marry you.. We’ll raise our family.. TOGETHER.. Never apart. Okay?..” He spoke softly holding my both my cheeks while I’m sobbing because of him leaving.. I’m not ready but we need to. We need this.. I love him but I have to trust him.. 

Event Four

Cerina’s POV

He’s talking with a bunch of good-looking bachelor with his light and smiling face. I wonder, what they are talking about? Why are they laughing? I always miss his serious face. I miss his annoyed face whenever I’m pinching his cheeks.. I miss his jealous face everytime I’m with someone else.. I realized, I miss everything about him.  A familiar memory lingered inside my head..

3 years ago

Texon and I are here in the school backyard, hugging each other and just looking in the blue sky, as he speaks..