Every other year I have a vision that's unlike the memories of the invasion. Compared to them, I'm not soaring above the thrashed buildings of Lorien or watching as Piken stomp past me to gobble up poeple by the hundreds. I'm sitting at a table in what looks like a highchair, and everyone around me is smiling. I recognize my grandparents on the other side of the table, my grandmother clapping while singing a song I don't recognize, and my grandfather nodding along. Henri's told me before that usually my grandfather is the more energetic one, so this always felt strange to me.
Someone's hands are on my shoulder, but in this vision I can't look up enough to see who they are. They're warm and affectionate. I see my grandmother finish her song with a final note as she throws her hands in the air, then comes over and hugs the person behind me. After which, I'm lifted into the air and briefly get a glimpse of the person as they hug me as well. I see a woman with dark brown hair put into a simple braid, a cheery smile and deep blue eyes. My mother.
The dream ends there, and I always wake up confused and only remembering glimpses of the vision whenever I get them. It always occurs on a random day, and through the years I tried to recall as much as I can into order. The thing I remember most vividly is her face, excited and glowing.
I got the same dream last night, waking up on what happens to be Mother's Day. It feels nice, having a dream of the last bit of memory I have with my mom on a day that celebrates them here on Earth. I head out to New Lorien, where we're holding a family day event to celebrate. The Human Garde's parents come in with their kids through the Loralite stone we have set up in the main hall, or are teleported here from those who have that Legacy. Not an easy thing to get accustomed to, but it beats the hours long flight, drive, and trek that some parents seem to prefer.
I slide my way past the family reunions and excited chatter to go meet with Lexa, off in the corner watching parents and Human Garde walk past.
"Morning," Lexa waves at me. "Came at a good time, it's not crowded yet."
"I think we have enough space for everyone," I tell her. "Though I'm going to have to run a whole introduction probably a million times, and clear my name for half of that."
"Better get to it."
I shrug, not awake enough to bother right now. I hang out for a while, looking at the parents explore the main area of New Lorien with their kids. Most of them are gazing at Lexa's computers and the intricate symbols I carved on the walls with suspicion, but others seem delighted to be familiar with what their kids do these days. It'll take a while for New Lorien to get reacquainted with the public after a pretty sketchy few years, but I'm confident they'll come around.
My mind rolls back to the dream I had last night about my own mom. I don't remember enough about my family, but I like having that dream when it comes around. Seeing them happy and singing around the table with me is probably the closest way I can celebrate this day with everyone else.
"Hey, Lexa, do you remember your mom?" I turn to her. "My Cepan told me that Garde live with their grandparents while their parents develop and train their Legacies. Did yours finish training and start taking care of you again?"
Lexa widens her eyes at me, then she turns her head and hums thoughtfully. "I remember my mom, just a bit. I did live with my grandparents like you say, but I think I grew up and started working well before my parents finished training. It takes years I'm sure." She pauses. "I miss her, if that's your follow-up, by the way."
I nod. "Same here." I think about the Human Garde who don't have mothers to celebrate today with. Maybe I should find them later and see how they're doing.
"It's a bit unfair how little our parents actually get to spend time with us. But many are lucky and get parents who visit home frequently. I'm sure some of you guys saw your parents often."
"My dad visited a lot," I tell her. "And Six said her parents are friends with mine, so we saw each other a lot."
"Very lucky," Lexa teases.
I smile. Hopefully Six is having fun wherever she is too, remembering this fact fondly as much as I am.
"You know, something I just remembered, do you know the good night and good morning song in Loric?"
I blink. I've never heard such a song, but I didn't think we had that on Lorien. I shake my head.
"It was pretty common that Garde parents wouldn't see their kids for a long time, like weeks or months. We used to have a lullaby that only parents would sing to their kids about how they're going away at night, and will return in the morning. While the kids sleep away, their parents would fight away the monsters that come at night, and will return on a morning when their battles are done. It's more of a goodbye song, if anything, to help kids who are scared to say goodbye. My mom sang it to me and my brother, but she taught it to me to get my brother to sleep since he had trouble sleeping without her." Lexa holds a hand over her mouth, taken away by her own memories as well. We stand there for a while in the midst of chatter and reunions.
I think that over. I wonder if my mom sang that to me. I wish I could remember it at all. Maybe that's the song my grandmother was singing to me and my mom. I trace back to the dream from last night, recalling what I can of the song. My grandmother clapping to the beat, her voice chipper and high, reciting words in a language that should be on the tip of my tongue.
"Maybe I know a little of it," I speak softly.
Lexa looks at me encouragingly. It feels almost strange reciting my grandmother's words when I've never spoken a word of Loric since I was a kid, if I remember any at all. I breathe, and try my hand at making that connection.
Soft, almost mumbling sounds trail from me as I try to place the tune. It's more like a jumble of sounds to me, but based on Lexa trying to familiarize herself with my attempt, I hope it clicks. I try my hand at what I can parse from my grandmother, sounding out words as best I can. I think I only got one or two verses in before I fade off, red hot and guilty. "Sorry."
"No no, you got a bit of it in there," Lexa says. "I don't fault you for not remembering Loric that much, you guys were just kids when you left."
I nod, still frazzled from my attempt.
"I'm certain that's not the lullaby though. I'm pretty sure that's how we sang happy birthday on Lorien."
I blink. "Was it?"
"Yeah! The tune is pretty different from ones on Earth. You got around the parts where they hope for more years and more cheers, like, y'know, in a happy birthday song." Lexa gestures back and forth like she's conducting a song.
"I have that memory every other year, how can it be?" I ask, though I'm pretty sure birthday dreams don't have to be an annual thing if they're dreams.
Lexa shrugs. "Lorien had a different calendar year than Earth does."
"Ah."
"I think you mentioned a name in there as well," Lexa adds. "Someone named Lara."
Lara. The woman whose hands were on my shoulders while my grandmother sang happy birthday. Her cheerful smile and lit up gaze meeting me as she pulls me into a hug. My mother, Lara. "That's my mom's name."
Lexa smiles.
My eyes wet at the memory, suddenly fresh with a new light. "I dreamed of her last night, my grandmother singing happy birthday to her. So.. today's her birthday."
"Seems like a good day to celebrate it." Lexa looks over to the growing crowd of families in front of us. Parents still gawking at the building, moms hugging their kids with as much love as a mother could offer. One of them was given a flower grown from a plant Legacy.
"Yeah. Yeah, it is," I whisper to myself. If my mom could be here too, seeing where we are now, how much I've grown. Maybe she does, on her birthday, when I go back to the memory we share at the table with my grandparents.
"Happy Mother's Day, Mom. And happy birthday."
