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Saturnia - Celestra: Queen of the Transforming Dolls (Placo Toys)

#celestra #placo

Solitude - Seraph Celestra

"Made almost solely to sing, dance, and generally pleasure the Old Gods, the Celestra are masters of manipulating magic, and especially illusory Astral Magic. Of all the angelic seraphs, the Celestra are highly talented at tricks, illusions, and deceptive charm, and they typically behold a fascination for all things magic and star-like.

With the Heavens destroyed, the Celestra are now free to wander and explore at their own want. While many might still fall into their old roles as entertainers in skeevy taverns or questionable pleasure houses, some pursue an active interest in studying the magical and mutative aspects of the Reborn World; becoming mageling Vagrants as they wander the broken lands."

It occurs to me that I've never reviewed a "girls' toy". And I have just the thing: one of the few toys I've gifted my other half that she specifically wanted on the main Old Stuff Shelves.

It's Celestra herself! And no, there didn't seem to be any way to kill that glare; the packaging is so warped it won't photograph well no matter what.

Manufactured in '86 by discount-store bottom-feeders Placo, Celestra and crew are essentially shrimpy She-ra knockoffs with entire hollow vehicles hanging off their backs. Oh, and no weapons. Only combs, because "girl". And "cheap".

The back of the card reads more like a distributor's ad copy than anything, but it gives us the basics: these are mashups of Transformers and Barbie, your kids will love them.

I did look up some photos, and while Celestra is arguably the best choice, it almost doesn't matter, because all four not only share a body/head mold, there's no unique paint either. They're all wearing the same colors and patterns, the same blond hair. Just a hilariously disinterested execution, and we haven't even seen it clearly yet.

Hoo boy. Seldom do I encounter toys so bad they can't even meet my gaze. That's a thousand yard stare if I ever saw one, and it's permanently cast downward. She moves at the Big 5, naturally, and can't even hold her comb. Which is attached to the packaging with some sort of alien super-tape, and irretrievable without destroying what's left of the package. It's just as well, her hair isn't getting out of place anytime soon after being crimped into that shape for 30-plus years.

Honestly, the robot form could've been a lot worse. It's got a nice touch of Zeerust without looking stupid. Almost more 50s than 80s. The legs still move, but not very far. She can give a slight bow, but then she just falls over. I guess you could pretend she's so powerful, she doesn't need to move much, just floating around in a fairly neutral pose like Stardust the Super Wizard, firing rays of indeterminate power from her visor.

In an interesting twist, a proper toy designer seems to have snuck into the factory at night and altered the molds, adding a good sturdy slider joint to raise and lower the helmet for ease of transformation. Simply bizarre.

This is exactly the sort of wackiness I miss. A lack of cross-cultural awareness and some lax copyright enforcement led to a decade or so of samurai turtles on European warhorses, space skeleton pirates, and Skipper's fanciful notebook doodles forcibly dragged into three dimensions. It was a wild time, and we'll never see it again. Whether this is ultimately a good thing is up to you, but I'm happy slowly mining it for inconsequential content.

#80s toys #toys #vintage toys #dolls #celestra

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Аудиосистема в bmw e60, призёр соревнований по автозвуку EMMA и SQCCLUB. Магнитола штатная, подключение через процессор Helix dsp pro2, система NBT активна. Это нужно слышать! Компоненты: #focal #carrozeria #dynaudio #celestra #Pioneer #zapco #revolt #Emmabelarus #автозвук #автомобили #сабвуфер #тюнингавто #минск #otvintasound https://www.instagram.com/p/Bm6WT3Ghg0I/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=xuosguzoeab8