#caspbert

The word echoed around the cave, making Hubert wince. "If that is what you say to your victims, it's no wonder I have to spread rumors about your ferocity."

Caspar laughed and let go. "I told you to stop doing that. I can scare people all on my own! Just last night I made a human girl scream."

"Hm, in terror or excitement?"

"Uh, terror? Duh? A merperson swimming up to you in the dead of night's terrifying!" Hubert chuckled. Pouting, Caspar folded his arms on the rock beside Hubert, his brown and blue tail flicking behind him. "What?"

"I don't think you will ever truly grasp human women, that's all. I heard one today describe you as "cute" and "a poor thing"."

Caspar glared up at Hubert. "I'm not cute." Hubert only laughed. "I'm not cute! End of story!" He spun his tail and splashed Hubert.

Shaking his now damp hair, Hubert held up his bag. "Keep that up and I won't let you see what I've brought."

Caspar stuck out his tongue between two fanged teeth. "What makes you think I wanna see?"

Hubert raised an eyebrow.

"Okay, fine, I'm sorry. What did you bring?"

Hubert made a show of sifting through the bag, pulling out a cloth-wrapped item, carefully pulling back each layer-- all the while ignoring Caspar's growing impatience.

"What is it?!" Caspar yelled, the sound once again bouncing off the cave walls.

At last, Hubert held out the item, which Caspar snatched immediately. "It's a charm," Hubert said of the woven bracelet Caspar now looked over eagerly.

"A charm for what?"

"It prevents lightning from striking nearby."

Caspar looked up sharply. "Lightning?"

"Yes." Hubert fastened his bag and placed it with his boots, avoiding Caspar's gaze. "I remember how you were when I visited during that storm and thought this might alleviate your fear somewhat."

"That's... wow. Thanks, Hubert."

"You're welcome." Hubert desperately hoped Caspar didn't ask where he got it. The bracelet had been difficult to charm correctly and Hubert had stood in several lightning storms to be sure he had done it right. But there was no need to explain all that.

Caspar didn't ask. In fact, Caspar didn't say anything. Hubert looked around to see Caspar struggling to put the bracelet on his own wrist using mainly his teeth.

Shaking his head fondly, Hubert leaned over and took the bracelet. "Allow me," he offered.

Caspar held out his wrist and allowed Hubert to secure the bracelet. "Thank you."

Unable to resist, Hubert leaned further down, and kissed his cheek. "You are quite welcome, Caspar."

Caspar didn’t know a lot. BUT. He DID know one thing.

He’d had ENOUGH!

It was pretty much everywhere he went! No matter what! Over and over, he’d her people talking shit about Hubert, writing him off as “just the Emperor’s lapdog”, as if that was an okay thing to do!

It didn’t matter that Hubert said that he didn’t mind and that they were speaking the truth (which they WEREN’T, and Hubert shouldn’t have to pretend like they were!), Caspar was still not gonna stand for this! He was going to show those jerks that they were wrong!

And he had an absolutely, one hundred percent foolproof plan to do so! Linhardt helped him come up with it!

...Honestly, Lin had only agreed to help him because he said that, “just yelling in Hubert’s face about your love for him won’t go well.”

To be fair, it wasn’t like Hubert knew Caspar loved him, so Lin was probably right about that...

Bah, whatever! That wasn’t the point here!

Caspar shook off the lingering doubts - he had an important job to do! He couldn’t get hung up on dumb stuff he could take care of later! Maybe! Probably never! Whatever!

He knocked on the door to Hubert’s office, waiting a few seconds to see if Hubert would answer. As Lin had predicted, he very much did not. So Caspar did what he did best.

“HEYA HUBERT! IT’S CASPAR! I GOT SOMETHING TO TALK TO YA ABOUT!!” Caspar exclaimed as he slammed the office door open. 

He could see Hubert actually jump at his desk - which shocked him for a moment, until he realized something. Hubert only ever jumped when something startled him because he was completely off guard. The only time Hubert was ever completely off guard was when he was asleep. Hubert had...actually been asleep at his desk.  And Caspar just woke him up very loudly.

Oops.

Caspar didn’t hide the wince as Hubert turned to look at him, eyes narrowed in clear anger for a few seconds before he just sighed.

“What is it, Caspar?” Hubert asked, pinching the bridge of his nose. He did that a lot when Caspar was around.

He sounded pretty annoyed, definitely because Caspar woke him up like that; but he didn’t sound as annoyed as he could’ve been. Don’t ask how Caspar knew that, it’s a long story that he’d like to not relive, thank you.

Anyway!

“I was coming to drag ya out of your office! You’ve been in there all day! Some fresh air could do you some real good!”

Yep! This was Caspar’s completely foolproof plan! Just take Hubert out on the town to have some fun! (He REFUSED to say date, because it wasn’t a date! Nope! Just two friends hanging out!)

“I’ve been inside all day because there’s a lot of work that I still need to do-” Hubert was already saying, which was Caspar’s cue to cut in. He knew if he let Hubert keep talking, he’d end up just going back inside his office. So!

“Nope! None of that!” Caspar interrupted, grinning triumphantly. “I already asked Edelgard about it, and she said it was fine!”

Actually, she didn’t, but that wasn’t the point.

Hubert stared at him for a few moments, as if trying to decide if Caspar was telling to truth. Actually, that’s probably exactly what he was doing. Caspar tried not to fidget. Eventually, Hubert must’ve decided he was telling the truth (phew), because he let out another sigh - one that Caspar knew meant he was relenting.

“If Lady Edelgard approved it, then I suppose I’ve no choice but to play along.”

Caspar smiled. And that smile only as the day progressed. His plan really was going perfectly! They were both having a good time going out on the town, and Caspar even saw Hubert trying not to smile! It was amazing! All in all, everything was going according to plan!

“Ugh, watch out - the Emperor’s dog is coming...”

...Well, it was, until some ASSHOLE decided to speak up.

Caspar felt his hands curl into fists as he heard the words, whirling around to stare down the person who said it. The only reason they weren’t suffering from a serious case of what he’d like to call “Caspar’s Fist Directly Through Their Face” disease was because of Hubert’s hand resting on his shoulder.

“Don’t bother, Caspar. They’re simply stating facts.” Hubert’s voice sounded resigned, his expression carefully blank - which Caspar knew meant that Hubert was actually really bothered by what they were saying.

“But they’re not! Because you’re way more than what that bastard says!!” Caspar shouted, feeling the anger creeping into his voice.

He knew that they were drawing a crowd, but he didn’t care about that. What he cared about was getting Hubert to not listen to that jackass!

“Really, Caspar, you’re causing a scene...” And there it was, Hubert trying to change the subject because he didn’t want to talk about this. Well Caspar wasn’t gonna let him!

“That doesn’t matter! They should be here to hear about how amazing you are! You’re a super talented mage, maybe even rivaling Lin in how smart you are! And you always use that to help everyone, no matter what you say! You’re way more nice than people give ya credit for; and that’s not to mention how loyal you are! I know Edelgard knows she can always rely on you no matter what, just like everyone else in the Strike Force!”

Caspar could hear murmuring in the crowd, and see how Hubert’s face was slowly turning more red. He wasn’t used to all the compliments - which only drove Caspar to say even more compliments! Because Hubert deserved to hear everything good that people thought about it!

“And besides! You’re the guy I love! Of course you’re awesome!”

Hubert froze. “What.”

Caspar froze himself. Wait, actually, Hubert wasn’t supposed to hear that part, abort mission ABORT MISSION-

Hubert let out a sigh - but to Caspar’s surprise, it wasn’t like...an angry sigh, or a disappointed sigh, or a “I’m five seconds away from losing it” sigh (don’t ask why Caspar knew that one).

It was...a relieved sigh.

“Well...” Hubert looked away, the blush on his face deepening. “I suppose that makes things easier for me...considering I love you as well.”

Caspar felt his jaw drop. He was not expecting that.

But he couldn’t say that he was unhappy about that - not when he was letting out a shout of joy and pulling Hubert down for a kiss.

(”Hey Caspar!” Annette said one day, having been on a date with her partner Stag. “Now, who’s that next to you?”

The tone to her voice was obviously teasing, and Caspar grinned widely.

“That’s my husband!” He exclaimed happily. No matter how many times this happened, whether it be Annette or someone else from the Strike Force, Hubert couldn’t stop the blush from appearing on his cheeks.