#captain alan

Happy to be able to share my thoughts on Roy!

Still debating whether I should read more routes...

Happy new year!

Who will you choose this year to protect you?

[2020 Guardian Contract: ALAN]

In the new year, you will welcome:

- A guardsman of your very own

- A version of yourself that gives your all in what you do

- A banquet of delicacies that will never be finished

- A healthy body and soul

This is the protection [Buff] of the Captain of the Guardsmen, Alan. 

Guardian: Alan Guarded: ___________ [Please sign here]

The descriptions of the Seven Dwarves dolls are fucking gold.

Magda is a 9 on the Sakan family scale, homegirl doesn't need that luck lol. No shrine for you, Juven.

"NO HAMMER, NO LASER EYES." THEY FUCKING KNOW ABOUT THE MEME!!!

Thank fuck no laser eyes.

Is that a reference to Balfey falling off his horse??? Why would I want a change or refund, HE'S SO CUTE!!!!

Alan in a skirt Alan in a skirt ALAN IN A SKIRT yes please

You will take your hits BG AND YOU'LL TAKE IT LIKE A MAN 💪👊

when have you ever worked a day in your life and no, plotting does not count