My lips are chapped||Barry Allen||Cancer series 2
Pairing: Barry Allen x Sick!Reader
Summary: You have cancer and are currently going through chemo therapy. You are currently seeing forensic scientist, Barry Allen, and he just found out that you are sick. This part is just about you two figuring out your sickness.
Warnings: Serious illness, Cancer, Sorta sad not really, minor swear words
Note: this is based off Cancer by MCR covered by TĂP. I kinda want to make this a series, but letâs see how this one goes first.This is part two so if you havenât read part one first. Takes Place at the beginning of Season 3
Thank you for all the love on Part 1! When this was posted there were over 70 notes on the first part so thank you so much for all the love and hopefully you will love this part just as much. I hope to get part three out my Sunday. Again thank you for all the love!
You had only told Barry about your illness yesterday, yet it felt like a life time ago. Almost everything had changed since then. Things werenât the way that you had thought they were going to be when he found out. They were way better, and you were thankful for that.
 True to his word, Barry had taken the rest of yesterday off work and took you back to his place. The two of you sat curled up on his couch all night watching episode after episode of How I Met Your Mother. He had you tucked into his side under a large, warm, fuzzy blanket; you fell asleep like that cuddled up to his side. He woke you up around midnight offering to take you home, but asked him if you could stay. Barry wanted the same thing, so he let you stay. You sleep in his bed right next to him last night.Â
When you woke up this morning, he was no longer beside you. You sat up slowly because the nausea you had felt at the end of your date yesterday had returned with a fiery vengeance. Yesterday seemed like childâs play compared to what you felt now. You ran to the bathroom and leaned over the toilet to puke. You heard the quick patter of feet come up behind you. As you emptied your stomach, you felt Barry rub your back in soothing circles with a significant amount of pressure.Â
âAre you okay?â he asked when you had finished.Â
âYeah, that happens sometimes,â You said as you stood up and flushed the toilet. âDo you have a new toothbrush I can use?â
He crouched down to get under the bathroom sink and began digging around as you watched his shirtless back. Your eyes wandered over his muscular figure in awe. He was lanky, but damn did he work out. When he got up, he caught you checking him out which caused a smile to stretch across his face.Â
âLike what you see?â Barry said as he strolled over carrying a packaged red and yellow toothbrush. He was chuckling heartily which left a warm feeling in your gut. You grabbed his hips as he got closer, pulling him to you faster. Your hips were pressed together. You could tell it was making him a little hot and bothered. You smiled at him as you ran your fingers up his abs.
âI like it very much thank you for asking,â you said. His laugh resonated through his body shaking you as well. He leaned down to try and kiss you, but you stopped him by putting a hand between your mouth and his. His lips made contact with the palm of your hand which caused him to pull away. His eyebrows furrowed as he stared at you.
âI have puke breath,â You said to which he held the toothbrush up to his nose. There was a small smirk painting his lips. You smiled at him brightly. Though your puke breath was definitely a reason for not wanting Barry to kiss you, it wasnât the real reason. You were insecure about your lips. After your first chemo session, you noticed that they were really chapped, and it had only gotten worse since then. They really hurt too so you didnât want to have to worry about being in pain while kissing him.
You took the toothbrush from him and moved around Barry to stand in front of the sink. Carefully, you opened the package stumbling a little over it because you could see Barry standing behind you hovering. This was a simple case of nervousness, but you worried that Barry would perceive it as another thing he had to help you with.Â
âDid you buy this toothbrush because they are the flashâs colors?â You asked him trying to pull his attention away from your trembling hands. You saw him make eye contact with you through the mirror at the sound of your voice. You were able to relax enough that you could get the toothbrush out of its package and put toothpaste on it. Barry let a small laugh through his nose.
âI didnât even think about that,â he responded as he leaned against the doorway.
âYou totally did, didnât you?â You turned your head to look at him with both your hands resting on the either side of the sink. âYou are a hardcore flash fanboy. Iâve seen the way your eyes light up when you talk about him.â
âOh, come on, that is so lame,â there was something about that damn laugh that just filled you with warmth from your head to your toes. âSo, what if I take pride in my hometownâs totally rocking superhero, at least I am proud of mine.â
You glared at Barryâs dig at you about something you had mentioned about the Arrow about two months ago, but you didnât add anything else. Neither of you did. You ran water over the toothpaste.
âAre you hungry?â Barry said coming to you and wrapping his arms around your waist. He rested his head on your shoulder and stared at you in the reflection of the mirror.Â
âAre you always this clingy with girls you have only known for about three months?â You said before putting the toothbrush in your mouth.Â
âHey, it could be worse. I could have asked you to move in with me by now,â he said laughing. You laughed as well as you brushed your teeth. He kissed your cheek before letting go. He walked to the doorway of your bathroom.Â
âIâm making breakfast, eggs and pancakes. When youâre done freshening up, come eat. Okay?â
âOkay,â you responded spitting in the sink. You watched Barry from the reflection as he moved down the hall. You felt yourself relax without him over your shoulder. Two minutes later, you finished brushing your teeth and rinsed off the new toothbrush. You placed it into the cup beside the sink which just happened to have the flashes logo on it. It held what you presumed to be Barryâs toothbrush. Though, like you said earlier, you had only been seeing Barry for three months, you liked the idea of having a toothbrush at his place. It was comforting.
Looking at yourself in the mirror, you ran your hand through your short hair. When you pulled your hand away, a chunk of your hair came with it. After your surgery, you cut your hair in preparation for this day. You had read that it would be easier to adjust to no hair if your hair was already short when it started falling out, but you were left in shock by the hair you had just pulled out. You looked at the spot and saw that it wasnât two noticeable, but you felt incredibly self-conscious about it. You were already running your hand over the small bald spot continuously.Â
âY/N, are you okay up there?â You heard Barry call from what you presumed was downstairs.Â
âYeah, Iâll be down in a moment,â you called back. Quickly, you threw the hair in the trash and went back into Barryâs room. You found a black beanie on the floor and pulled it on. You then made your way down the stairs and into the kitchen.
Last night, Barry had explained to you that he had moved back into the home of his foster father where he had grown up last year because he spent so much time there. You hadnât really thought to much about it then, but no one else was really home and awake at that time. Now as you walked into the kitchen in only a pair of Barryâs basketball shorts and his black Star Labs sweatshirt, you were very aware of the older man, who you presumed was Joe, standing in the kitchen with a cup of coffee having a conversation with Barry.
Barry was leaning against the counter beside the man with a mug sipping his own coffee. Barry looked at you with a smile. He set the mug down on the counter and walked toward you. Gently, He brushed the back of his hand against your cheek. He ended with his palm on your cheek which you leaned your head into ever so slightly. His eyes shone brightly, and the look brought butterflies to your stomach. You couldnât help, but think about all the things Barry did that made you feel so comfortable around him.Â
âBarry, you gonna introduce me properly to Y/N here?â the older man said. You both turned to look at him. It was as if you both had forgotten that he was even there as you shared a moment. You felt your face and ears heat up a little at the thought of the man seeing this intimate moment between the two of you.Â
You noticed that he already knew your name. You were surprised that Barry talk about you enough for him to remember it.
âOf course, Joe, this is Y/N, my girlfriend. Y/N, this is my foster father, Joe,â Barry said gesturing between you two. Butterflies erupted in your stomach when Barry calling you his girlfriend. You reached your hand out to Joe to shake his.
âNice to meet you,â Joe said to you with a kind smile that reached his eyes. âBarry has told you so much about you. He talks so much about, and it seems like heâs always on that phone texting away at you. I canât believe you actually put up with this kid. I donât know what I did to make him end up like this.â
You laughed and looked at Barry who had a slight red tinge to his cheeks. Wrapping your arm around his waist, you snuggled into his side. Barry enveloped you in his arms without missing a beat. The warmth of his body made the heavy sweatshirt seem a little suffocating, but you didnât say anything to ruin the moment.
âWell, itâs nice to meet you, too,â you said looking back to Joe. âBarry talks about you a lot as well. I think heâs proud of you. Even if you he doesnât explicitly say it.â
With that statement, pride and love light up Joeâs face like a Christmas tree. You were happy that Barry had Joe in his life, that Barry had this family. After about a month of talking, Barry told you about his past. It devastated you to hear about it. Knowing that he had a family who loved him as their own, made it seem not so bad.Â
âI will, let you lovebirds get back to whatever you were planning on doing,â Joe said gesturing between you two with his coffee cup. âI have to get to work, but I will see you at the CCPD, Bare.â
âOf course, Joe. Iâll be in a little late. I already let Julian know,â Barry said.
âOkay, Bye, you two. Again, it was nice to meet you Y/N. Â I hope to see you around here more.â
âBye,â You and Barry both said as Joe left you two alone.Â
You released Barry and went to sit down at the table. Barry went to the counter and picked up two plates. He set one down before you and sat down in front of the other. You two made small talk through your breakfast and made plans for tomorrow. Afterwards, you decided it was time for you to head home. Barry said he needed to get to work, so you parted ways for the time being leaving him with one final hug and a promise to see each other at a later date. Â
Barryâs P.O.V. (I wonât do this too often, but there was no real way to carry on the way I want to without it)
Barry let his frustration flow through him into every punch to the large black punching bag. He had been at it for at least twenty minutes, and his hands ached, growing sorer with each punch.Â
Barry needed this time to clear his head. His mind kept going over his relationship with Y/N. He really liked the sweet h/c (hair color) girl. He remembered the first time he really talked to her.Â
Barry was in the flashpoint timeline sitting in CC Jitters waiting for Iris to come in so he could work up the courage to ask her out. One thing Barry was grateful for in flashpoint was that he and Iris werenât raised like siblings. He thought because they never lived like that that maybe he would get a chance to be with her.
He heard the door open and flipped around thinking heâd see Iris coming in for her usual coffee. The person who entered CC Jitters was not Iris, but she took his breath away. He stared at the girl with her h/l h/c hair and e/c eyes. His mouth was parted as he stared at her. Barry could feel his heart beat, irregularly thumping against his rib cage.
Barry watched in awe as the girl ordered her drink and patiently waited for it be finished. The littlest things she did, amazed him. As she collected her drink, Barry stumbled around his table trying to shove his stuff back into his bag, so that he could talk to her before she left.
When he had finally collected everything, he looked up to see the girl had already made her way out of Jitters. He got up and ran to catch up to her. He kept his distance following her waiting for an opportunity to introduce himself to her.Â
The girl pulled her phone out of her pocket to answer a phone call and seemed to forget her surroundings. She kept walking straight into traffic. Barry heard the horn of a truck that was coming barreling at her at the same time that she did. She was so scared that she dropped her phone and her coffee as she stared at the rapidly approaching truck. Barry used his speed to save her and run the two of them into an alley away from the sight of others.Â
The girl was shaking in Barryâs arms as he slowly pulled away to look her over for any possible injuries. He looked into her eyes and saw fear and something else that he had never seen before. He couldnât explain it, but he knew that he had made the right move with her. That they had some future.
âI- Did you- Thank you,â she said looking over the man in plaid. It occurred to Barry in that moment that he was in no way disguised. This girl could see his face after he just used his powers to save her.
âWho are you?â She asked him. She stepped further back from him. The look on her face seemed to say she was trying to figure out who this man who just saved her was.
âMy nameâs Barry Allen,â He said trying to come up with more to say. In this timeline, he wasnât the flash, and he had no way to explain what he just did or why he had the same powers of the flash. The name he had given her didnât help to ease her mind as she still looked over him frantically. Barry noticed that her eyebrows were furrowed tightly.Â
âYou- you saved me,â she sputtered out the words. It sounded as though she was tripping over her tongue. âWh-why d-did you save me?â
âWell, I wasnât going to let you get hit by that truck now, was I?â He said laughing at the shock on her face. He had never had an encounter like this when saving people before. He guessed it was probably because they always saw him as the Flash and never Barry.
âH-h-how?â She said as she looked between Barry and the entrance to the alley. Barry laughed a little as he tried to come up with some sort of explanation for his actions.Â
âWell, Iâm a meta,â he said as he rubbed the back of his neck cautiously trying to avoid any connections to between his recent actions and this timelines flash. Barry was swimming in uncharted territory with this girl. This timeline already had a flash and didnât need that from him. All he wanted to do was save this amazing girl from getting hit.
âThank you,â she said so quietly that Barry almost didnât hear her. The girl was looking down at the trash covered ground. Barry towered over her. He saw the way her hair fell on the back of her neck.
âWhatâs your name?â Barry said. She looked up at him through her eyelashes. He regretted asking when he saw how wide her eyes had gotten.Â
âY/N, Y/N Y/L/N,â she responded. She offered her hand for him to shake which he gladly took.Â
âI know this sounds really weird after what just happened, but would you maybe want to get a coffee with me? Maybe Iâll be able to explain better what just happened?â Barry said. He watched as she took a moment to look over his face in a gentler manner this time. âI saw you drop your coffee earlier and thought maybe I could get you a replacement.â
âMy phoneâŠâ she said. Her eyes grew to the size of saucers. He remembered that her phone had been dropped as well and quickly ran back to look for it. When he got back to her not even three second later, he handed her a phone that was barely damaged at all.Â
âThank you,â she said. Barry suddenly became worried that his girl was so shocked that she had forgotten all the other words in her vocabulary âSo you want to grab that coffee?â
Barry smiled at the more relaxed girl standing with him. Together they walked safely back to Jitters.Â
While Barry was in flashpoint, He and Y/N had grown really close. They had started dating even. He had been sure that he was in love with her. She knew everything about him, and he knew everything about her. He was truly happy with her. When he had to fix the timeline, and come back to the present, he hadnât even thought about their history being destroyed. Everything they were was just gone in a moment.
Barry had been crushed when he realized that he no longer knew Y/N, that she no longer knew him. For the following week, he did everything he could to find her and start the process of getting to know her again. Barry specifically went to CC Jitterâs at Y/Nâs favorite time of day to see her sitting there reading a book. He was so happy that he finally had this chance again, but it wasnât the same. He did everything right, but it wasnât the same.
Barry hit the punching bag so hard and with so much speed that the chains creaked with the strain.
âBarry?â Caitlin called into the large room.Â
âWhat, Caitlin?â He nearly yelled at the woman who had come to check on him.
Caitlin jumped at his tone, and for that Barry felt guilty. He looked at Caitlin who just seemed to be concerned. He knew that he shouldnât have yelled at her. None of what was going on was her fault. If anyone was to blame, it was him. He hadnât known Y/N before flashpoint, so he didnât know if she was sick before, but he knew she wasnât sick in the other timeline. He was worried that his changing the course of time had caused her to get sick just like caused Danteâs death.
âIâm sorry,â Barry said turning his body towards her. He threw one final punch the bag. This one was much weaker than any of the previous ones.Â
âWhat happened Barry?â Caitlin said walking towards him. She spoke softly and her eyes were so kind. âYou seemed so happy yesterday when you told us you were going to have lunch with Y/N. You never came back. Now you seemâŠâ
âAngry?â Barry said. His voice sharper than a knife. It seemed to cut into Caitlin slightly. She just nodded at the man in front of her.Â
Barry was out of breath just slightly, but surprisingly there was little sweat on his star labs shirt or his forehead. He seemed loose and careless with himself throwing his weight around like it was nothing. He walked over to where he had set his water bottle against the wall and took a big swig of the cool liquid. He ran his hands over his face before looking back to Caitlin.
âI think I might have killed the girl I love without even knowing,â He said softly.
 Caitlinâs eyebrows furrowed as she watched the man before her. His lips were pressed tightly together and his forehead creased. There were tears budding at the corner of his eyes. Barry looked down at the ground trying to hold in his tears. He heard the sound of Caitlinâs heels click louder as she approached him.Â
She carefully wrapped her arms around Barry pulling him in. He buried his face in her neck and let go of his tears. They slowly rolled down his cheeks. His body shook with the sobs. All the pieces he had been holding together since she had told him, fell away showing Caitlin his cracks.
âY/N is sick. She has cancer, and I think itâs my fault,â He said. His voice was muffled by Caitlinâs hair, but he was sure that she heard him. Caitlin ran her hand in soothing circles on his back. She understood what he meant by that because he had told her about the differences before and after he created Flashpoint.
âItâs going to be okay, Barry. We are going to figure this out,â she said. She kept repeating herself as he cried into her. Neither of them knew if what she what she was saying had any truth to it, but it did comfort Barry, so she didnât stop.Â
Everything was different now. It echoed in Barryâs mind as mulled it over and over again in his head.
Everything was different.
Part 3Â Â Part 4Â Â Part 5