#calliewrites

The first goodbye was a first love: Amabil Lawon.

The signs were obvious in Atem’s attraction: the butterflies, the burn, the bashfulness, the stares. Everything was soft, innocent, and destructive. It was hard to keep it in, and he paid it in full price. He thought he would stay behind the rock formation until he passed, but it seemed the universe was merciful to him that night.

The goodbye was due to lack of attraction. Amabil admitted to not having the butterflies, the burn, the bashfulness, the stares. She thought she would over time, but she could only feel platonic. Atem understood, she understood, and so they said goodbye. It took time to mend him, but they were closer than ever.

The second goodbye were a second and third love: Keir Rawaqi and Cirrina Havfrue.

The signs hidden better, but Keir and Cirrina were observant. They always caught Atem’s stares and smirked knowingly. The attraction was there, and they were the ones who invited him in their relationship. It was where he had his first taste in reciprocated feelings and in lust. It seemed the universe was in his favor this time.

The goodbye was due to the standards he gave himself. He felt like he had to do so much to keep both happy. He would beat himself over if he didn’t think he gave both equal attention. Atem expressed his concerns, and the duo understood, allowing a mutual break-up. He felt lighter and better as the two still gave him casual affection.

The third goodbye was a traitorous love: Janus Diplós.

The signs were beginning when Janus asked for his heart. Atem’s attraction grew, giving all of his heart into the relationship, believing the lie of mutual love. The caravan watched unknowingly, very few knowing of the actual circumstance. It seemed the universe was planning for his demise, ready to make its move.

The goodbye was due to finding the crushing truth. He was simply having a walk when he heard them. His gut twisted with dread, and he regretted it then. In the arms of another, sharing the taste of another’s flesh. The caravan placed a performance suspension and restraining order on Janus, while Atem stands farther from the mess.

The fourth goodbye was a vulnerable conversation: Miklos Amaryllis.

There were no signs on Atem’s side, only from Miklos. He hid his signs well, only exposing it in private or to his closest friends. The performer was going to leave in a few days time, and the crafter wanted to celebrate early. Alcohol buzzed the crafter while the performer was still sober. It seemed the universe was giving pity this afternoon.

The goodbye was due to drunkenness. Miklos spilled his heart in slurs, tears in his pinkish-orange eyes. He doesn’t want Atem to go and tells him how he wanted to have a chance like the others. Everything became vulnerable and real, and so Atem gave his thoughts before leading the crafter to his bedroll.

The fifth goodbye was a bittersweet celebration: the entire caravan.

There were signs of familial love, and Atem accepted it all with welcome arms. There were many good wishes placed upon him, gifts of all kinds handed to him, and casual affection given to him. It seemed the universe was alight with the happiness hiding the bitter conclusion of the performer.

The goodbye was due to the desire to settle. It’s been twenty-one years since he traveled with the caravan, filled with various memories that built and destroyed him. He had a family that loved him. A home, but it wasn’t one he can come back to all the time. They always traveled, and so in the end, he packed up and went to find his own.

The sixth goodbye was a promise: Mililani and Edwin Holz.

There were signs of a blue pride swelling in his parents’ hearts. The ride was quiet until they reached the beginnings of the outskirts of the city. Time stood still for the family, the winds whispering into the sands. When his eyes met his mother’s and father’s, it seemed the universe was reminding him of what he was leaving.

For @justawaystogo (timewellspent, AKA my good friend Holly), who placed the winning bid on me for Fandom Trumps Hate, a new fic: The Winter Garden.

As Sherlock nears the end of his career, he's given the gift of a cottage in Sussex. The honey from the beehives out back is amazing. Almost...magical.

Posting Mondays and Thursdays until Christmas.

From K&A: Kerubin & Anima AUs (Pt.6)

“By the Ones Up Above, I’m ready to crack open his head,” they grumbled, glaring holes at the doppelganger.

“Can you try to be more positive?” Gabe whispered.

They deadpanned. “I’ll be jumping with joy when I kick his ass.”

Gabe facepalmed. “I sometimes wonder how you’re me from another timeline.”

They snorted. “Ask the Ones Up Above or the Ladies. Maybe they have an answer.”

The camp counselor gasped. “Good idea! I'll pray later today!”

How does Atem love in a relationship with a significant other?

He gives his entire heart in the relationship, so full and bright.

If you’ll allow him, he’ll smother you in kisses. He’s so happy to be and in love with you, and he can’t hold it in. He has so much to give.

He’ll keep professing his love to you, quietly or loudly. He’ll make sure you don’t forget you’re loved. He’ll say it as often as he wants, no matter how many times you tell him to stop.

If you’ll allow him, he’ll cuddle you close. Limbs entangled and breath slowing, he missed this dearly and will be sleepily reluctant to let you go in the morning.

He’ll wait up for you, despite your scoldings to just go to bed. His body may be begging for sleep, but he wants the last thing he sees to be you.

If he’ll allow you, he will let you remove his mask. Only the caravan and certain people are allowed to see his face, but it’s the highest honor for someone to remove his bildungsroman, his journey, his memories to show who he truly is.

He’ll write a song for you, either to sing or to play on the flute. The fluttering tones and the tumultuous pitches to tell your story. The softer tones and leisurely pitches to tell how he fell in love with you.

If you’ll allow him, he’ll hold your hand, one moment to swing it between the two of you and another to press against you. It’s something so small, but he’s with you, the one who made him brighter.

He’ll buy various items that remind him of you. It can range from fruit to a crafted good. You’ll ask him why or even scold him for buying something useless. He’ll look sheepish as he explains, saying he can’t help it.

If you’ll allow him, he’ll pull you into an impromptu dance. The twirling and dipping is all in good fun. There’s no need for music as both of you are in a world where only the two of you exist. It’s happy, domestic, and full.

The skips in his steps are more pronounced when he’s with you. His gigglings seem nonstop when he’s around you. His smiles seem brighter and softer towards you. The way he looks at you is so full of love, his cheeks often colored in pink.

He wants you to be happy, to be loved. If you’ll allow him, let him give you everything you deserve despite what you say, think.

((For @mauvemacabre and their apprentice Than. I was randomly inspired from the discord ok. I hope I characterized him alright))

“What’s this?” Than asked, eyeing the thin decorated, rectangular box in Atem’s hands suspiciously.

Atem’s cheeks grew warm as he held out the gift a bit sheepishly, smile small. “Well, I heard it was going to be your birthday…” When Than quirked a brow, his eyes darted up in the corner before darting down. “Ok, I’m late.” Meeting his gaze, he nudged the redhead’s crossed arms with pursed lips. “But it’s just because it was difficult finding cords in your colors!”

Looking between the brunette and the box, Than carefully took it, inspecting for something, anything. Atem groaned, reaching under his mask to rub under his eye. “Than, please just-” He thrusted his arms forward, gesturing at the gift. “Open it!”

Upon doing that, it revealed that most of his fingers were wrapped in bandages, something the redhead took note of. Undoing the knot and removing the top, he blinked in surprise. Sitting regally in the box was a mask, a mask that looked similar to Atem’s.

The colors were desaturated shades of oranges and blues, glittering despite the shades as he tilted the box. The pattern created diamond shapes in the orange, the lines slightly shaky but nonetheless straight. In the blue, fanciful swirls like in Atem’s golden part of his own mask decorated it, lines more careful. The two sparkling gems that separated the colors were in a teardrop shape, the orange sapphire and blue spinel perfectly cut down the middle. The cords twisted around the edges of the mask, a shade brighter than the rest.

Gently gripping the mask, Than moved the box on the table to reveal two matching colored ribbons, the shades as bright as the brunette’s own. The gold dangled from the sides of the mask, shaped in elongated briolettes. He’s amazed at the craftsmanship, wondering how long it took the brunette to craft this beautifully adorned art. He was gingerly admiring the gold in his hand when he noticed a shine above the mask.

His cocoa eyes squinted at the source, widening slightly when he realized they were black feathers. Noticeably shorter and stiffer than what Atem sports, he can’t shake the feeling he knew where these came from. When he looked up, he was surprised to see Atem slightly hunched, looking at the floor like it was the most interesting thing in the shop.

Looking at the feathers swaying above the brunette’s head, he could’ve sworn they were slightly brighter with a pinkish shade to them. Clearing his throat, he met the wide, expectant gaze of sky blue circles surrounded by earthy browns. Atem’s lips were parted in a hill shape before stretching into a nervous smile.

“So, whatcha think?” he asked, tilting his head.

How he stood reminded Than of a puppy, expectant and eager. Taking another look at the mask, he replied, “It’s beautiful…” He stared at it a bit longer, appreciating the time and effort put into it, before looking up. “How long did it take you?”

Leaning back, Atem’s eyes rolled up in thought, his lips pressed into a thin line. Smacking his lips, he began, “I sent a request for the materials about…” He hummed thoughtfully, bringing up a hand to vaguely count on his fingers. “At least a month ago?” His brows furrowed. “The caravan was somewhere nearing a jungle, so they came in about two weeks? It was difficult to find the right shade of orange, especially since it’s not a common color.”

He began to use his hands to help him explain the process. “I also wanted to paint the designs on myself, and that took way longer than I thought. Quire even said it was the fastest drying paint they made but it felt like weeks! I expected the paint to dry within minutes, but it took nearly half the day to dry!” He huffed, pouting as he crossed his arms. “The rest didn’t take too long, but finding a box that fit the mask?”

He waved an arm down, head moving away as he did. “Pssh, don’t even ask.”

Than chuckled, warmth spreading in his chest. His hand lingered behind the feathers, asking, “What bird did you get the feathers from?”

Atem’s face morphed into something odd: eyes wide and looking everywhere but him, brows furrowed in something like guilt, and lips puckered and pressed into a thin line. His stance was stiff, arms behind his back. An awkward pause stretched between them, the tension building. 

It was until Aurelia, Than’s condor, gravelly cawed.

Both men snapped their attention to her before slowly meeting each other’s gaze. “Atem…” he began, tone warning the brunette to carefully choose his words.

The brunette began to awkwardly laugh, his smile awfully wide. “I didn’t, I didn’t pluck it off her if that’s what you’re thinking…” he trailed off, the feathers of his mask twisting anxiously. Aurelia grunted from her spot, earning a hissing shush. “Reli!” he hissed, waving an insistent hand in her direction.

“So you did…” the redhead murmured, his tone displeased.

Hands shaking rapidly in front of him, the brunette adopted a defensive stance. “No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no! She was grooming! I even asked her if I can take two!” he quickly denied before relaxing into a confused stance. “Well, she didn’t peck me or anything when I did…But I didn’t just outright pluck it off, ‘cause that be rude!”

Relaxing but still wary, Than sighed through his nose. ‘Did he ask Aurelia?’  he asked telepathically. ‘Yes. Grooming, Atem ask.’ Nodding, he gave the shorter man a rare, soft look. “Thank you Atem. I greatly appreciate this.”

For the briefest moment, his body stiffened as a pinkish hue colored Atem’s cheeks, a sight sadly covered by his mask. Atem then greatly relaxed with a relieved sigh, like a colossal burden was lifted from his shoulders. Smiling brightly, his feathers perked up, following the little bounces he did. “I’m glad that you like it! Why don’t you try it on?”

The redhead blinked, taking a moment before bringing the mask to his face. Once he felt the knot was secured, he met the brunette’s gaze, the gold gently bumping against his cheeks. “How do I look?”

Atem Holz, masked since birth. At least, that’s what the people believed...

No one knows where he was born, what were his origins. Truly, it lies in a caravan that still travels to this day. There were people of all walks of life, so there was no purity in genetics. But the caravan wouldn’t have it any other way. It was such a happy people, and from what he remembered, he laughed when he was born, not screaming or crying.

A baby, the people would murmur, how would you remember?

They would be answered with a gleeful grin and bright giggles. “If not, then why am I now?” he would offer before dropping a few coins on the tray of a server. “I believe I’m needed for another day. I’ll see you lovely people again,” he would then say, getting up to fully bow before doing that odd walk of his to the door.

How his brother smelled like the fresh air of the islands he came from, the pure dirt that let beautiful vegetation grow.

How his brother felt like the bright, warm sunlight that enveloped the islands he came from, the soft brushes of caressing leaves.

How his brother sounded like the freedom of the islands he came from, the brightness of the people that lived there.

How his brother had eyes like the gentle incoming dawn, the dark oak breathing more meaningful life than what was here on this Earth.

To Sadelle, it sounded impossible. It sounded like a lovesick fool written by Shakespeare or some other famous poet. It sounded far too dreamy and far too full of fantasy. There was no one in this world like that. There was no one at all.

Aiichiro insisted on this, suggesting that Sadelle should just spend time with his little brother.

How his brother was a completely different world, something that this place forgotten.

How his brother was a breath of fresh air, something that this place lacked.

How his brother was a warmth that this place had never felt or seen, something that this place needed.

Sadelle ended up giving in to the older Segovia, partially to stop the pestering and partially to the affections he held for him.

Gabelle had told him that he didn’t have to, that perhaps his brother thought too highly of him. Sadelle insisted, because Aiichiro would probably lock them in a room together until Sadelle understood.

Until Sadelle understood the majesty of his brother.

Until Sadelle understood the needed purity of his brother.

Until Sadelle understood the starvation of his brother.

Gabelle had sighed, but let him do what he wanted. Over time, Sadelle slowly understood. Sadelle understood why Aiichiro described his brother so. It was because Gabelle was.

Gabelle smelled of a fresh air he had never smelled, smelled of dirt that let bountiful vegetation thrive.

Gabelle felt like the bright, warm sunlight, feeling like soft caresses of the leaves of the beautiful vegetation.

Gabelle sounded like the freedom he had never heard, the brightness of the people he had never met.

Gabelle had eyes of the gentle, incoming dawn he rarely saw, the life they breathed was something he never saw.

Aiichiro had smiled knowingly when he began to talk about his little brother more and more. Gabelle was another completely other world he couldn’t describe, a breath of true fresh air that he hasn’t felt, and the warmth that he never thought he would immediately miss.

Darkness was their friend.

Brightness was also theirs.

The darkness curled around them, whispering and quite cold.

The light wrapped around them, chattering and quite warm.

The funniest thing was that the darkness and brightness were siblings. Inseparable, because they depended on each other. Without brightness, there would be no shadows. Without darkness, there would be no illumination. Sometimes, they fought, but in the end, they were a part of each other.

Gabelle had been huffing laughs ever since the sibling gems chose them as their beholder. It was welcomingly cold and lovingly warm. The light was surprisingly talkative and lively, something that they weren’t used to. The dark was incredibly polite, but tended to act like a strict parent.