#cakesandfail

@cakesandfail @lipwigvonmoist These are very silly. Also Otto is obvs my fav and best boy but like Mal is for sure up there on the list.

Yesssss Sybil!! Very happy to get the chance to write about her. general opinion: fall in a hole and die | don’t like them | eh | they’re fine I guess | like them! | love them | actual love of my life

Kind, gentle, and strong, Sybil means so much to me

hotness level: get away from me | meh | neutral | theoretically hot but not my type | pretty hot | gorgeous! | 10/10 would bang

Okay so I am the kind of ace that finds this question tricky, but I feel safe in saying that I would have a major...hug crush on Sybil. Like...just really want her to snuggle me.

hogwarts house: gryffindor | slytherin | ravenclaw | hufflepuff

Said Hufflepuff, ‘I’ll teach the lot,And treat them just the same.’

The Lady Sybil Free Hospital, everyone.

best quality: Her unerring commitment to love and mercy and seeing everyone as having worth.

worst quality: I imagine she carries a very high insurance premium, specifically for fire insurance. (Wait. Discworld's affair with insurance was short-lived and disastrous). Okay, let's go with the fact that she knits lumpy socks.  

ship them with: Sam Vimes, of course. And Vetinari in an OT3, shhhhh I just have a thing for a happy healthy marriage seeing a prickly sad person and being like….we have enough love for them too.

brotp them with: Well, if we're not going with the OT3, Vetinari for sure. Also I just really think she and Cheery would get along? Kind, cheerful, full of explosions. Match made in heaven, really.

needs to stay away from: Anything that makes her life less joyful. I trust her emotional intelligence enough to know what that is. She doesn't need me figuring it out for her.

Excessively detailed headcanon meme.

12. Favorite book genre?

As a child, Drumknott read like, pretty much everything - he did read a good deal of fiction and poetry, especially if they were written by nationals of Ankh-Morpork or about Ankh-Morpork. He’s a firm nationalist, and he really does love a lot of the overly romanticised accounts of the city and its developments over the years, although Drumknott’s politics are just *wince*. He also read a lot of non-fiction, especially atlases and encyclopaedias, various guides and dictionaries to some things - he loves animals, and read up a lot as a child about various animals, particularly birds. He genuinely and fervently enjoys biographies by accountants and clerks, librarians, histories of certain kinds of stationery or publishing methods, and so on. 

He’s pretty much read all the classics of note, though, so nowadays he mostly reads newer non-fiction publications, especially anyone who publishes new stuff about like, newspapers, the trains, and other new technologies and ideas. 

Non-fiction about stationery and trains are probably his favourite that he’d admit to, but really, any poetry about Ankh-Morpork has this stupid boy weak at the knees.  

17. Preferred mode of dress and rituals surrounding dress

When he was a little boy, Drumknott would have been in pretty typical dress, like, shorts, shirt, jumper. As soon as his father died - like, the same week - he started wearing trousers, and would not go back to wearing shorts. So, Drumknott would help out in the grocer’s and pretty much did their accounts, as well as doing budgets, setting up the paper orders, etc: as a young lad (I’m talking like, from 10) he started doing his own work for various people in his neighbourhood and helping do budgets and stuff for people who couldn’t afford to hire a real clerk or accountant from one of the Guilds to help out, especially during tax season, and he put pretty much all of his own money aside, separate from the money the grocer’s shop earned.

He spent this money on getting clothes for himself, so by the time he was 12/13, when he wasn’t in his school uniform, he’d just be in a two or three-piece. He’s not comfortable in clothes that can tear or show the underneath easily because he doesn’t like how people react to seeing the scars on him, and so he tends to just dress very neatly in his clothes.

He used to have his suits tailored in the relatively modern, straight lines that weren’t like, hugging tightly to the body, but were very neatly square. Since joining Lord Vetinari’s service, his suits are tailored a bit more loosely with slightly different lines on them, in such a way that he looks a good deal smaller - not just thinner, but like, actually smaller, more compact - than he really is. He is very particular about his clothes, and always has a small sewing kit to hand so he can fix little blemishes and imperfections ASAP. 

31. Most prized possession?

So, when Drumknott joins Vetinari’s service, he carries a very old, silver pocket watch that was his father’s. He hated his father, still hates him a lot now, but his mother was very plaintive about having him wear it because she said proper young men ought have a pocket watch, so he wears it. He could never really justify buying himself another one, because he doesn’t need one - he’s got a very keen internal clock, and the only reason he wears a watch is just so people can see the chain.

A little over a year in Vetinari’s service, Vetinari bought him another watch. It was gold, not silver - Drumknott’s glasses have gold rims, and his tiepins and cufflinks are usually in gold or brass, too - and it was just smaller and more delicate in general, without being as battered and messed about as Jasper’s old watch had been.

Drumknott is very fond of the watch, and wears it every day.  

35. What activities do they enjoy, but consider to be a waste of time?

He doesn’t feel it’s a waste of time, exactly, but he does find it harder to justify reading poetry and fiction than he does reading non-fiction stuff that could potentially be helpful at work. That aside, I don’t think he really goes in for any activities he truly considers to be a waste of time, just because he’s so particular about how he spends it and what he should be doing at any moment.

Just the ask I was hoping for hehehe thank you!

who’s the cuddler: I feel like Vetinari is not a very tactile person, and Vimes would deny any allegations of wanting to cuddle the Patrician. However, somehow, when they are asleep, Vimes’s arms end up around Vetinari, and his head nestled on his chest. Vetinari does not mind this in the slightest.

who makes the bed: Vetinari does, and he does it flawlessly. Vimes has not made his bed in 30 years and you know it.

who wakes up first: Vetinari, but he’s very good at pretending to still be asleep. Especially when aforementioned cuddling happens.

who has the weird taste in music: Well, Vetinari prefers to read music to hearing it. Dunno if that counts as weird.

who is more protective: Vimes is. That one’s canon, I mean, have you seen this guy

who sings in the shower: Sybil does. Maybe you can catch one of them humming, if you are really quiet and he doesn’t notice someone is listening. They hum very different songs though.

who cries during movies: Neither. They’d both nitpick any little plothole instead.

who spends the most while out shopping: Neither of them spends much on shopping. Vimes prefers to dress in street clothes and cheap boots and he eats junk food. Vetinari dresses in dusty grey robes and eats dry bred.

who kisses more roughly: V i m e s

who is more domineering: They both can be really terrifying: Vimes in an intense, angry, fire-y way, and Vetinari in a bone-chilling ice-cold way. Fear them

The Fifth Elephant must’ve been confusing to start with! There’s so much based on previous character dynamics. I’m glad it worked! (It was one of the earlier ones that I read too, after Men at Arms, and I thought Leonard and Gaspode were in all of them, haha)

cakesandfail

  cakesandfail  9, 27, and 49...

yeah no I’m not disputing the fact that she’s naturally talented at socking someone in the face, just saying her best friend and her husband are professionals at this kind of thing

“Sybil, did you just...uppercut Rust?” Sam sounded both a little outraged and a lot in awe*.

“...Yes,” Sybil replied, sounding rather proud of herself.

“...Bring your elbow closer in tou yourself next time, and push up with your thighs. It’ll knock him right out next time, instead of just making him muzzy. Shut him up for longer, and less chance of you straining anything.”

With that, Sam took his wife’s hand, stepped over the prone form of Lord Rust, and went back inside to the party.