#cacalapoo

I've spent my entire lifetime trying to please you and meet all those expectations you had set for me. I have been living a life you wanted to live, instead of living my own life. I always knew this, and it was always on the back of my mind but I ignored it. I kept lying to myself and telling myself that I was living the life I wanted, but I wasn't. My entire life all I ever wanted was to make you happy. I wanted you to be proud of me, but I don't think I ever achieved that. So fuck you and fuck trying to please you. I have held myself back and turned down opportunities because of you. This ends now. My happiness comes first.

Last night when I arrived at the Greek Theater I locked my keys in the trunk of my car.

I'm so excited for this semester to end!! I mean I don't want it to end because I love my magazine production class and I'm sad it'll be over in a month. BUT we got to see a preview of what the design of the magazine is going to be AND ITS FUCKING AWESOME!!! Tom is an amazing designer and he had both my stories almost completely done and it was fucking mind blowing knowing that I will be a published writer.

These dreams are just getting really weird.

The sound of your name no longer tastes bitter in my mouth. You don't cross my mind like before. But when someone mentions the future plans we had and how they pictured us together forever, that right there just kills me.

My heart just sinked to the pit of my stomach.

You were sweet And you were more than a distraction You bewitched me with your words I crave you're undivided attention I want to spend every day with you Holding hands, making stupid jokes, cuddling, people watching, singing and dancing in your living room I want to fall asleep in your arms Kiss you good morning Just live in the moment and not worry about tomorrow But you left without saying goodbye Now I sit here wondering why