#bye insta

Randomly remembered today that if I ever stopped working at the dispensary that I'd delete my Instagram profile. I never had one before I got hired there. They wanted me to make one to help advertise products.

Since the company is well on its way to closing down, I might as well keep my word!

When I think about my overall experience, nothing good came out of it. Of course I enjoyed the reels, and memes, and all the content creators I followed. But on an interpersonal level, with people, nothing good came out of it.

The interactions I had with women felt forced on a personal level because it was mostly business related to the dispensary. They'd start friendly conversations but it just got exhausting after a while because it always eventually led to sales.

The interactions I had with men felt disgusting because they were hiding their relationships. I don't care if we're in the same state, different states, or even different countries, I don't want to talk to anyone behind anyone else's back.

That's not to say my experience will be anyone else's. I just feel it's further confirmation and more assuring for me that it's time to let it go because there's nothing worth holding onto. More thoughts later.

i've deleted instagram yet again because it really is a soul sucking platform ? im very sensitive to the grindTM and doing betterTM and better myselfTM, and in small doses it can be helpful ? but it was making me grumpy about my own life and relationships which is not welcome here. Plus on Tumblr i can just rant into the void and be funny.

so im glad i did that ! im also going to bike more because taking the subway on the daily is making me feel existential dread in the face of capitalism. will expand on that later alright bye girlies (affectionate, gender neutral)