okay i have the time and brain space to talk about this properly now. so
when gwayne goes to war, that is the longest he's spent away from oldtown (and ormund) in at least a decade. and he spends that time getting more and more attached to a man who reminds him of ormund in some of the worst possible ways. he very nearly dies trying to find the good in this man and save him (and others) from himself.
gwayne may hold the class and ethnic privilege over criston, but he is also, in his own way, someone very used to being an outsider and second-best: an untitled ward in oldtown, a superfluous second-in-command in the riverlands, a gay man in a hypermasculine world. and he is still outranked by criston, subject to his whims, and dependent on his decisions to stay alive.
and criston cole is many things but among them, he is fanatically religious, prone to violent outbursts, and fond of making chilling philosophical speeches. (but criston's emotions are honest, while ormund plays games.) he is someone who shrugs off and philosophises rape committed by his men when gwayne asks him personally to condemn it. (but ormund actively punishes those who resist rape.) and over time, gwayne's relationship to criston devolves more and more into gwayne arguing and pleading with him to think of the safety of those in his power, himself included, and being refused. (but at least he isn't punished for questioning him at all.)
and gwayne's "sunrise from the hightower" speech is... two things. firstly, while it's easy to compare it to criston's "run away with me" speech, it's actually not like that at all. gwayne is talking about running away from the current trauma but straight back to his old, familiar traumatic home. and secondly... it is very literally gwayne describing a memory of ormund's abuse and saying "but there was beauty in it. and it would be better if it happened with you."
