#but it hurts...

Sometimes I wonder why I hide the tears.

I wonder if people love me as much as they say they do.

I wonder if I'll be a success just like my friends and family tell me I will be.

I wonder if I'm going to die surrounded by the ones I love and the ones who love me, or whether I'll die alone. 

I wonder if I'm ever going to get over my fear of being alone. 

I wonder if I'm ever going to honestly say "I'm ok."

I wonder why I lie.

I wonder why I care. 

Sometimes I wonder if I'm worth the time.

I wonder why I can't do things as well as some other people can.

I wonder why I have so much trouble just fitting in.

I wonder if I'll ever reach my dreams.

Sometimes though...I wonder if people talk about me behind my back.

I wonder about the things I said or did and how they might have affected anyone who heard them.

I wonder why I'm so paranoid...

I just don't feel good enough. Like there's always someone out there who's better than me. Like everything I've worked hard to gain is just slipping out of my fingers with each second that I sit here wondering....