#bugbo headcanons

Bugbo

He is always driving exactly. the speed limit.

Not a digit over or under.

And he never accelerates or breaks, the car just. is. in the state he wants it to be.

Everyone in the car has to be buckled up, sitting straight forward, feet on the floor, or the car isn’t moving.

(Fights have broken out because of this, usually between him and Hoppo)

He says it’s for safety

(knowing him it’s prolly a power trip thing)

There is no music. Dead silence. Even the wind outside seems quieter

And in the off chance there is music, there’s no lyrics and it’s probably some shit like

“Kahoot Question Music 1 Hour Loop”

And it’s so quiet you can’t even recognize what it is.

If you try to talk to him he’ll respond in short, almost snippy responses

If you keep trying he’ll eventually just point blank say “You know, it’s not very safe or polite to distract the driver.”

Unless he likes you, somehow, then he might have a short conversation with you.

He does the same when he’s a passenger, but to a lesser degree

He’s usually the one who dictates who drives, and, for some reason, he picks Joe a lot.

(Joe doesn’t mind, he likes driving :>)

Hoppo has accused him of being scared of driving before, which he did not take kindly to.

Gerbo

He tends not to drive since cars don’t fit his… build.

He’s all legs, cars aren’t made that way

But in the case that he does, he’d probably drive really slow, mostly out of caution

He most definitely is scared of driving (but Hoppo isn’t gonna say anything to him)

Which isn’t much of an issue considering they probably have the only car on globe

Like that one Yo Gabba Gabba episode

Music wise, I’m not sure

Everyone infantilizes him so much, it drives me crazy

Y’all aren’t listening to Baby Shark 10hr loop

Maybe once for the hype

BUT THATS IT

He probably would listen to more upbeat music,

I have a very limited taste in music and I don’t think he’d like any of my music (It’s all about drugs and wanting to eat the rich or it’s Jack Stauber)

Actually he’d maybe like some Jack Stauber music! Like maybe Buttercup and songs along those lines! His more happy sounding music?

Idk other people with different/better music taste tell me what you think

He doesn’t mind conversation while he’s driving. In fact, I think he likes it!

He likes the casual small talk type conversations, and if they lead into deeper conversations that’s even better!

He offers to drive anytime, but it’s usually either Bugbo or Joe driving, not that he minds. (Please don’t make him drive)

(He does prefer it when Joe drives, but he’d never say it, especially not to bugbo)

Gradient Joe

He’d probably drive the most

He’s the one most… built? for a car?

He tries to drive the speed limit but he might get distracted and speed up or slow down a little

So like, typical driving? I guess?

His music would likely also be more instrumental, mostly because it is a bit easier to focus

And he’s probably driving everyone around, so he’s gonna need some help focusing

But also when it does have lyrics, y’all can fight me on this but I bet he’d like love songs

Like, this isn’t a “omg he’s a romantic he wants to kiss everyone and marry everyone omgggg” thing, more of a like,

Everything is so- rough? All the time?

I mean, he got shoved face fucking first down a mystery hole that was who knows how deep, then guilted into running for mayor with no prep, and then whitenesses a murder, all in around 48 hours

Everything is so fast paced and bright and so much all the time

And love songs are usually much softer, calmer, sweeter

It’s a little moment of peace, you know? Even if it’s just a little distraction before Bugbo ropes him into another wildly overwhelming adventure

Anyway woah car headcannons hi this is what we’re here for jfc

He kinda prefers it to be a little quieter too

(And I think bugbo might, in one of his brief moments of kindness, remind the others to be quieter so he can focus)

If it’s just him and one other person, he might substitute music for listening to them talk

Even if he can’t respond, he likes to nod along and give other people a little break too. Just let them get things off their chest, yk?

I bet he also likes to drive because it is a little tiny bit of control within this chaos ridden mess of a universe.

Why is this one so long? Where did all the gradient joe angst come from? What the hell?

Hoppo

She doesn’t drive often either

Not because she’s built more bug like and so it’s a little awkward for her, she makes that work.

She doesn’t drive because the others won’t let her.

She is driving at least 15 over the speed limit on a “safe” day

Hits curbs like they spat at her grandma

Probably has at least one leg propped up in the seat at all times

only one hand on the wheel

Music. Is. BLASTING.

Marina, Scene Queen, Mother Mother, Sir Chloe, Girl in Red, Penelope Scott, Hemlock Springs, Mitski, Chrissy Chlapecka, Kiki Rockwell, and the occasional Lemon Demon

She has a playlist called “songs to piss bugbo off”

And she’s just casually chatting with whoever is in the front seat while the car shakes from the bass in these songs

Bugbo doesn’t let her drive because he knows she’s doing her best to piss him off

Joe doesn’t let her drive out of pure fear

Gerbo, ironically, is usually in the front seat because he minds her driving the least

If it was just her and Gerbo or Joe she’d prolly tone it down some, maybe at least turn the music down

But if Bugbo is within five miles, you best believe Pink Rover is gonna be shaking the ground he stands on like an earthquake

She’s pretty much the same as a passenger. If Bugbo is driving she’s being obnoxious and goofy, if it’s anyone else she will tone it down some

If Bugbo’s not around she’ll tone it down a lot, maybe just chatting and laughing

(Let me make it clear, she doesn’t dislike bugbo, in fact quite the opposite. But that’s another headcannon for another day)

Thomas Flyswatter

He has the only other car on globe

(I can’t decide if it’s the helicopter he used and it just doubles as a car or if this bitch just has like a Honda civic parked behind his lair)

Driving wise, he’s similar to Joe

Generally pretty typical, though depending on his mood he might speed quite a bit

He rarely, rarely has anyone else in his car

If you even see his car he trusts you a lot

If he drives you around you might as well be besties

Or he pities you (which if this man is pitying you you’ve gotta get your life in check bestie cause holy shit-)

The music he plays depends on his mood and who he’s with

If hes in a villainy “I’m gonna go do evil things mwah ha ha >:D” he’s listening to Toby Fox (and y’all cannot convince me otherwise)

If he’s in a more relaxed mood he, too, may listen to Jack Stauber (probably different than the songs Gerbo would listen to though, some similarities tho) and Definitely some Will Wood

If you are his absolute bestie, like he trusts you with his life, he may, if you’re lucky, break out the broadway music, but only if you’re very lucky

He may be a little quiet at first, but if whoever he’s driving around starts a conversation with him he’ll talk

And also if he’s not talking he’s subconsciously lip syncing because I’m projecting stfu

Hoppo:

Hoppo is absolutely cracked at almost any game she plays. Girl would definitely have the best gaming set up (if they play video games in that universe I'm not entirely sure how the bug globe works lol)

Hoppo is skilled with multiple weapons and firearms

Don't let her drive 💀 Like she can drive, and very well, but don't let her

Curls up and sleeps like a dog/cat

Knows she's the tallest and will sometimes rub it in subtly (like she'll never state it outright, but she'll randomly stand over Bugbo and look down and *insert the little laugh she does here*)

She likes fast, thrashy, wacky, discordant music (see: Assault and Batteries by INK or Magical Doctor by Maretu)

Has a little place full of "neat things" that she collects which is just a bunch of random crap she's picked up, from a uniquely shaped leaf to bones from the battlefield

To her, pranking and scaring people is silly fun shenanigans

Loves scaring Thomas in particular, but in a slightly more malicious sense, as he was planning to kill one of her friends lol

Like despite her constant absences, she does care about them

Gerbo:

Even though he isn't the brightest, he definitely has the best heart out of all of them

Despite Bugbo's....passive aggressive behavior toward him, Gerbo still loves him (platonically) with his whole heart

Though he does get along really well with Gradient Joe in particular

I think they get ice cream together (can Joe eat...? With the no mouth...?)

A Goofy Goober™️

He also has a collection of little things, but it's less...concerning than Hoppo's, like shiny or special rocks, cool or different colored leaves, etc. and proudly shows them off to people who are willing to look and listen

It's not too hard for him to get shut down/discouraged, but he perks up just as easily

His favorite season is fall