#buffyxwillow

They say you have to have something worth fighting for.  That always seemed so easy to me.  I mean, when your enemies are evil bloodsucking fiends bent on destroying the world?  Well, the thing is, I like the world.  I like my friends.  I like my family.  And something tells me Hell dimensions aren’t big on shopping malls.  Dusting some vampires?  Yeah, I can get psyched for that. But dying?  I did not sign up for that.  I didn’t sign up for any of this, but whatever.  I’m over that, I guess.  You’d think after fighting vamps night after night, I’d have thought about dying, but no one’s ever accused me of being introspective.  I’d like to say something cool like “I’m the Slayer and I have to do my duty” or “it’s a small price if I die to protect the world”, but the truth is I just never thought I would lose.  I guess I’ve had that teenage sense of invincibility they - “they” again...just who are “they” anyway? - always talk about. Until I heard Giles read that prophecy.  Let me tell you, there’s nothing like hearing your own death sentence.  I’m not ready.  How can I be?  I’m a freaking teenager!  And sure, I like the world, but you know what?  I like my life too.  I’m rather attached to it, we go way back, life and I.  So I want to run.  I just want to run as hard and as fast and as far as I can from this.  And I could.  I could turn and run away.  Steal a car and hit the road.  Or hop the first bus out of town.  No one would be able to stop me. But I won’t.  Because...the world?  Life?  They’re nothing compared to her.  Her tears, the tremble of fear in her voice, I cannot let that be.  So I will stay.  I will fight.  And I will die.  At least she gave me one last smile before I left.  At least I can keep her safe a little longer.  At least I managed to hold back my tears until I was out the door.