#btvs reader insert

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You stood outside of the door, unsure of whether you should knock, or turn around and leave. Spike had left so suddenly after you got back to the Summers house, that you had no time to really check on him. So, hoping he came back to the school to hide out, you came to see if he was alright. But, you were afraid he might not want to see you. You twirled the handle of the bag in your hands around. You brought some medical supplies you thought he might want or need as well.

Feeling the worry in your gut was more overwhelming than your nervousness at him being angry with you, you reached out and knocked on the door. Waiting a moment, you knocked again, and this time called out “Spike? Are you in there? It’s Y/n!”

You waited again. Just before you were about to give up, you heard footsteps approaching the door before stopping just on the other side.

“What are you doing here?” His voice came through. It was a bit rough, and you could hear the underlying annoyance, making you ring your hands.

“Uh, well, I-....I wanted to see if you were okay.” You said softly and sincerely. “You left before I could talk to you, so I just...wanted to check. But, if you want me to leave I will...” You took a step back and got ready to leave, but paused when you heard him call out.

“No! Uh, no, I mean.” The door creaked open and you saw him appear. Seeing the bruises and cuts on his face made you frown as he looked at the ground “It’s alright. You don’t need to check on me.”

You bobbed in your place a bit “Are you sure? I uh...brought some medical stuff. Like, bandages, and cleaning cream and stuff, if you needed them…” You trailed off.

Spike couldn’t help the smile that formed on his face as he watched you. You seemed shy, and nervous about helping him. He cleared his throat a bit. “I don’t need the bandages, but...the cleaning solution I’ll take.” You looked up at him and he motioned his head “Come on in.”

You smiled as you followed him, watching him closely as he walked. He was able to move well on his own now, so he must have been healing relatively easily, which you were glad for. As he sat down he looked over at you and reached out for the bag. Quickly opening it, you grabbed the antiseptic cream and took it out, handing it to him.

You sat down as well and watched as he began to apply some of the cream on the deeper cuts. “Uhm, are you okay? I mean...besides being hurt…” You asked cautiously.

Spike avoided making eye contact with you and spoke with a relatively emotionless voice “I’m fine. It wasn’t the first time I’ve been tortured.”

You felt your heart wrench a bit at his admission, but nodded your head. As you saw him trying to put the cream on a wound along his side and back that he couldn’t quite reach, you stood up “Here.” Moving over, you took the cream from his hand, and he looked at you a bit surprised. You met his eyes for a moment as you sat on your knees “You can at least let me help a bit.”

He watched as you began to gently apply the cream onto his side, he couldn’t help but watch your face as you frowned in concentration. Glancing at another wound he had on the back of his shoulder, you began to apply some of the cream there too.

You seemed so attentive to him, not that it was unusual, you were always kind to him. It’s part of why he fell for you. Perhaps he shouldn’t be so surprised that you helped save him, or that you came to check on him like this. But why? Why do you care about him like this? Could it possibly be because you feel the same?

“Alright. I think I covered all of them.” You said with a small sigh as you closed the bottle, wiping your hands on your pants.

Spike couldn’t get the curiosity out of his head, and felt himself speaking without thinking “Why did you come? Was it just to check on me?”

You met his eyes and for a moment tried to think of some excuse. But remained quiet as you saw the look in his eyes. The unspoken question resting behind them. For a while now, you thought that Spike might have feelings for you, just as you had for him. He was protective, and sweet. He was a friend, but sometimes felt like maybe he could, and wanted to be more. Sometimes his flirting felt less like joking banter than it used to. And now as you saw the way he was staring at you, you think you knew more now.

“I thought it might be obvious by now.” You said, your voice soft, holding a hint of shyness as you set the bottle of cream on the chair beside you.

Spike felt his stomach seem to swell as you said this. If he could breathe, he’d be breathless anyways. And if his heart was beating it would be pounding. For as long as he knew you, there was something that drew him to you. He knew he had fallen for you, but he convinced himself that you would never feel the same. Not for a monster like him.

And now, as he saw the admission and vulnerability cover your face, he felt his own bubbling to the surface. “I saw you.” You looked from your hand and back to his face with a hint of curiosity “The First, he- made himself look like you. Made me think you were there; to save me...He taunted me, because he knew...somehow, he knew that you were my weakness. And... The more I think about it, the more I'm afraid this isn’t real, that it’s all a dream, and I’m still...down there...” He trailed off unsure of how to continue.

He saw surprise cross your face, mixed with guilt that didn’t belong to you. “That’s why you were surprised when I set you free?” You asked softly, and he nodded. Feeling a mix of guilt, anger and sadness about what he said, you suddenly threw yourself forward and wrapped your arms around him. “It’s not a dream Spike. I’m here, for real. I promise.”

Spike was surprised when you did this, but as you rested your head on his shoulder, he felt some of the weariness and pain fade away. You weren’t babying him as though he was a child, you were comforting him, exactly how he needed, and how he wanted. Slowly lifting his arms, he wrapped them around you. Unsure at first, but the more he felt your warmth, he tightened his embrace until he was hugging and holding you against him.

Feeling Spike pull you tighter against him, you were relieved. You knew what he needed, but you were afraid he might shun it. And as he pressed his head into your neck, and his body relaxed just a little, you smiled.

“Y/n?” He suddenly asked, his voice uncharacteristically soft.

“Yes?”

“Don’t leave...I mean...not just yet”

You felt your heart already rapidly beating heart begin to pound harder. “Actually.” You pulled away from him, though you did not want you. Spike met your eyes, and you saw a bit of anticipation behind his gaze. “I was going to ask you to come with me.” You saw him tilt his head a bit and you continued “I have a spare bedroom...and I don’t think you should stay down here all alone.”

“You’re...asking me to come stay at your house?”

“Yes.” You nodded and smiled a bit.

“And you’d be alright with that?”

“Yes, of course I would be, That's why I’m asking.”

“And I can...stay?” He asked cautiously, wondering if it was only temporary.

You nodded again “Yes, I want you to stay. Will you, I mean, do you want to?”

He nodded. “Yeah….I do.”

You stood up and looked down at him. “Alright, let’s go then.”

As Spike stood up, he continued to stare at you. Grabbing your bag you looked back at him, and using what confidence you could muster, reached down and took his hand in yours. Spike looked down at your interlocked hands as you began to lead him towards the door. As it really struck him that this was happening, he felt a smile stretch across his face. And for the first time in a while, he felt like things were finally getting better, and that he might finally get a little happiness, with you.

xx End xx

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"Yeah but I didn't get some of the courses I wanted. Have to try next semester." She sighed over the phone. Was it normal to talk to someone you had just left the day before as if you hadn't seen them in months? Maybe not but a lot was happening as the end of summer was coming to fruition. "Dawn is excited to go back to school"

"Interesting... She wasn't yesterday." Buffy sighed over the phone as her friend teased her. "Oh! So I'm going to try to get some essentials tomorrow!" She said suddenly remembering what she called Buffy about in the first place. "What color do you think I should decorate my kitchen in? Green? Red?" Buffy almost laughed again at one of her closest friends.

"You'll know when you actually go to the store. It's not like I can see the house." "Not yet! But you all are going to come visit me some day!" She laughed a bit. Her phone buzzed at her to charge. "Hey... Buffy. I gotta go. Phones is dying. Tell Willow and everyone I miss them."

"Will do." With that, the phone was hung up and placed on its charger.

(Y/n) sighed picking up her trash and began the work to make the floor as comfortable as possible until she could actually buy a decent bed.

--

The next morning, (Y/n) woke up at a fair hour for a Saturday and took a shower. It was nice to wash out some of the travel and sleep stink off before she slipped on her clothes for the day. Then she went to grab her phone as well as keys and her wallet. There was no way she could sleep on the floor for one more day and eating fast food everyday wasn't exactly a healthy option even if she did just arrive in town.

Sure she was still tired from the plane ride but she would stay tired. She need to find at least an air mattress. The car ride was short, it was nice. Familiar. It wasn't a huge change from one small town to another... Minus the demons and vampires. She hoped. It was simple enough to find the small plaza that had a few small shops and even a diner within walking distance of each other.

It was not even remotely difficult to find the things she oh so desperately needed. It was wonderful. (Y/n) was even able to add to her growing collection of magical artifacts when she stumbled into an antique shop. She thanked the gods that her family had loaned her a bit of cash to help her get by until she was fully working again.

Her day was going great... That was until she was hit with pangs of hunger. 'Did I even eat breakfast?' she asked herself before glancing at the time and gasping. She had been out a lot longer than she had realized.

Didn't she see a diner? She walked to her rental car and started a vague drive. Ah-ha! There was a diner.

She pulled in and was seated quite quickly. It wasn't long before her meal was ordered and her attention was drawn to her phone as she waited. There was a text message from Anya complaining about an argument she and Xander were having. (Y/n) laughed softly before responding with her opinion.

While she was distracted she didn't notice the small group enter. Especially a young man who had a slight staring problem. His eyes were locked on (Y/n) as she fiddled around with her phone. The young man was known by most as Jacob Black. A good kid who was madly in love with Bella Swan, his childhood friend.

"Jake... You okay?" Bella another member of the small group asked with concern on her face. An older man in a wheelchair who was previously chatting with the other older man in the group looked at the one named Jacob. A small knowing smile flashed over his features as he looked at his son.

'It's about damn time' Billy the man in the wheelchair thought. "Jake!" Bella's voice called him again, finally snapping the dark haired young man from his thoughts.

(Y/n) who was finally served food sat her phone down finally not even noticing the set of eyes on the back of her head.

"Is she-?" Bella whispered to Jacob just low enough for her father to not hear. "I... Think so... I think..."

"Son..." It was Billy who joined the conversation. "If you don't go talk to her... I will." Jacob's eyes went wide. How embarrassing would that be? His dad talking to his imprint before he could.

Jacob looked at the girl happily eating her dinner and playing around with her technology. Then she giggled. Oh God.

How could it be that just the day before he was trying to convince Bella not to turn into a vampire? That he was so madly and so deeply in love with the vampire girl that he defied Sam his pack leader for turn into dust and be replaced instantly by a young woman he hadn't even spoken to?

Jacob was so distracted by his thoughts he barely caught his father moving to go introduce himself. "No, wait. Dad. I'll go." He quickly stood up and wandered over to the table nervously. What was he going to say? What if she didn't like him? What if he said something dumb?

"Hey I'm Jacob." He said awkwardly, causing her to jump from what she was doing. Her face scrunched up in confusion before she finally looked up. Their eyes locked and it felt like everything stopped. Her heart beat hard against her ribcage at the very tall and dark haired man before her. "You looked lonely. Uhm. I know we just got here. But..." What was he doing? Inviting her to sit with his dad and his dad's best friend for dinner? That's weird isn't it? Especially since he was going to have dinner with a girl he was in love with.

"I'd love to join you." Why did she just agree to crash someone else's dinner? It looked like a family affair of sorts. "I'm (Y/n)!" She suddenly remembered her name. It felt like her face was on fire. He shifted from slightly nervous to having a large smile on his face. How sweet.

He even helped by carrying her stuff to the table. "This is my dad Billy. His friend Charlie and his daughter Bella." Jacob introduced allowing her to sit down. Something in the back of her mind told her that this was weird.

Something was off.

It felt... Magical. She knew magical.

But then Charlie began to talk about how he was a sheriff and the weirdness seemed to disappear. "So...where are you from?" Charlie asked trying to judge if this new girl was going to cause him trouble later. "Oh. Sunnydale," she paused. "California. Also graduated from Sunnydale high." She explained with a small smile.

Maybe it wasn't so bad joining their little dinner. It was nice having people to talk to, especially when one was so new. "What do you like to do Jake?" She said looking over at him before taking a bite of food.

"Oh, uh. I buy and flip cars right now. It's more of a side hustle really." He smiled at her. "Really?" She said with a smile on her lips. "Because the car I'm in is just a rental... If you find anything good will you think of me? I can't pay the rate they are wanting forever." She joked, gently and playfully touching his arm.

It was like fire. Both literally and figuratively. If it weren't for the people she could almost throw herself at him. But then his skin was so hot that it almost burned. "Absolutely." Jacob smiled. "What's your phone number?" He looked almost like a puppy who was just given a treat. She took his phone and put her number in and he sent her a text. A wolf emoji.

Her eyes looked him over again. Then the phone in her hand began ringing. She answered it quickly, it was the moving company.

Jacob watched as she excused herself to talk to whoever. Her once happy self was instantly deflated. Jacob did not like that at all. He felt it. He actually felt the sadness in her. Is this what it was like to have an imprint? Actually feeling their pain? She walked back in and sighed. 

“Are you okay?” Jacob asked with what (Y/n) could only describe as genuine concern. 

“My moving truck is going to be late. On Monday while I’m at work instead of on Sunday.” She shouldn’t be so easy to talk to someone she had only known for 20 minutes. Jacob didn’t like the look on her face one of distress. 

Jacob looked her over again, hardly getting tired of looking at her face. “I have some friends on the Res. Maybe we can meet them. Help you out..” Jacob offered without a second thought. 

“Really?” she looked at him unsure at first. 

Jacob nodded, a bright smile on his face. 

“O-okay” She agreed. 

  “Yep. Train then chill. C’mon, get ready! I wont go easy on you just cause you’re cute!” Her energy was as high as usually as she waited for Y/N to prepare themselves, knowing the other wasn’t always enthused about being a glorified punching bag but willing to make the sacrifice so that she could actually get better. 

  “You need another vampire to do this with. I’m not even a good fighter.” Y/n complained but complied, knowing that if it were Xander or Giles instead, the fight wouldn’t be able to last nearly as long and Buffy would have to focus on not hurting them. When their friendship started, Y/N never expected they would be helping the Slayer and the gang out in too many ways, but the vampire was pretty glad they had a more clear purpose now.  

  “Well, see! Then this is great for you too! You always talk about wanting to patrol with us.” As Buffy spoke, her movements began, a punch followed up by a kick that was easily blocked by Y/N before having them returned to her. “And what better way then to spar with little ol’ me!”

  “No, I said I wanna go out at night with you. Not patrolling, just out.” Y/N let out a grunt as one of Buffy’s feet collided with their chest. They quickly grabbed her ankles and flipped her, but the agile slayer landed on her hands and feet easily before lunging back into an attack. 

  “Well I during the night equals fighting and you during the day equals dusting so we have to compromise here!” Left hook, right jab, roundhouse kick. Both of them traded blows back and forth, Y/N only able to keep up so well thanks to being a vampire, but damn were they starting to realize just how much they needed  to improve. They were by no means a force to be reckoned with, and while they didn’t mind Buffy protecting them, they didn’t want to add to Buffy’s stress. 

  “Fine, but we better at least get to do some date things. Oooo, I can bring you flowers and we can put them on the graves where vampires about to come up!” Y/N almost sounded excited as they joked about it, the image in their head almost being a distraction as they threw a few punches. 

  Buffy rolled her eyes before quickly grabbing one of the punches that was thrown at her, twisting Y/N and practically throwing them. Buffy was pleasantly surprised when she saw the vampire catch themselves, a big improvement from when they had first met. 

  “Fine, we can do date things and patrol. But we are not giving the vampires my flowers.” She pouted which made Y/N laugh and nod in agreement. The fight continued on from there, Y/N barely scrapping by but contributing just enough of a fight so that Buffy couldn't let her guard down. Y/N may have been knew to fighting in general, but they found that if Buffy was involved then they could try anything at least once. 

  Minutes turned into an hour before Buffy finally flipped Y/N onto their back, imaginary stake on their heart while she panted with a confident smile. 

  “I win!” She cheered, ignoring Y/N small groan of pain as they moved to sit up. 

  “Yep, you win. Time for my runner up trophy though, right?” Y/N grinned from ear to ear, causing Buffy to roll her eyes once again before placing a kiss on the vampires forehead. 

  “What?? Just forehead kisses? Not even a cheek?”

  “No cheek till after the movie...and I actually mean cheek kiss, so don’t even think about it!” Buffy kept a stern look on her face as she helped them up, but Y/N took no offense to the teasing. They were taking things a little slow so that Buffy could build more trust in them, and Y/N didn’t mind that one bit. They already heard the stories about Angel and what happened with the older vampire as well as stories from the boys at college, so when Buffy asked if they wouldn't mind being slow about Y/N eagerly agreed. 

  “Finnneeee… We’re watching a horror movie though.” They stated, wiping at their own pants to make sure none of the dust from the floor was clinging to them.

  “Why do you like those so much? Aren't you the horror movie?” Buffy asked, assisting Y/N by picking a piece of fuzz from their hair. Buffy didn’t mind horror movies for the most part, though they had both agreed to no apocalypse themed ones unless zombies were involved. 

  “Hey, I liked them before I was turned. I cant help that fate thought it would be funny to make me into this...though it is like, really funny because I do have a Dracula costume from when I was a kid.” They chuckled and grabbed Buffy’s hand lightly, moving it down from their hair and placing a small kiss to the back of it before letting go. 

  “Okay, but don’t think I’ll cling to you because I’m scared or anything.” Buffy narrowed her eyes up at Y/N who continued to smile down at her.

  “Babe, that’s sweet you think I’m so brave, but I’m the one clinging to you when the jump scares start.” Y/N made their way to grab up their jacket, putting their arms through the denim material before letting Buffy wrap her arms around one of theirs. Buffy let out a small giggle as they started to make their way out of the training room and into the magic shop. 

  “Guess that’s true. I’ll be your knight and shining armor then.”

  “And I’ll be the member of royalty that was abandoned to a cruel fate prior to your rescuing. I owe you my gratitude, but all I have to offer is this handkerchief token and some poorly baked pie.” Y/N had moved to open the door, letting Buffy sort of lead the way outside but the two of them still being tied together by her arms. When the door shut behind them, Y/N fished the key out of their back pocket and locked the door, smiling at the fact that they were trusted enough by Giles for such an important task. 

  “Is...that a reference of some kind?” Buffy tilted her head as she questioned the vampires words, watching their expression closely enough to realize they were just rambling nonsensical things once again. 

  “No, I just kind of wanna make pie later. I miss pie.”

† Then suddenly he couldn’t stop himself from constantly being around you

† He would not admit to himself that it was because he liked you

† But then one day, you got hurt during a hunt

† And he was furious

† He yelled you for getting yourself hurt, and you yelled at him for being a jerk before stomping off

† As he watched you leave, he had the strongest urge to follow you, to apologize, to tell you that he was just scared.

† That was when it clicked in his brain

† He couldn’t avoid his feelings anymore, they were real

† “Shit”

† Then it was over for him

† He finally gave into it, knowing that no matter how much he tried to deny it, it didn’t make his feelings just disappear

† You noticed all of the changes in him

† Him suddenly disappearing, and then him being around you all the time, and now he was being protective?

† You hoped, deep down that it was because he liked you, because you couldn’t stop the feelings that formed in your own heart 

† But he was a soulless vampire right? He couldn’t possibly fall for you

† Wrong

† He fell hard for you

† The second he finally admitted it and accepted it, it was like a waterfall of feelings for you. He still kept them to himself though

† But he hated being away from you for too long, always worried that you might get into trouble and get hurt

† He also tried to play off the fact that he scared away every person that seemed to flirt with you because it was ‘fun’ to annoy you

† You believed him, sort of

First Kiss

† One day, after knowing each other for quite a while, you and the others had a fight with a pretty powerful demon

† Both of you got hurt, but Spike took the brunt of it when he pushed you aside when you were about to be attacked

† He saved you

† So, sitting in your living room, dabbing a large cut on his shoulder with a damp cloth, he couldn’t help but stare at you

† Your brows knit in concentration as you tried your best not to hurt him

† The annoyance evident in your frown for him getting himself hurt to save you

† “Are you ever going to say something?”

† “Wasn’t planning on it” you retort

† “You could at least say thank you”

† He could barely hold back the grin on his face when you looked up at him, glare evident on your face

† There was a hint of amused annoyance behind your eyes though

† He audibly chuckled before he gently took your hand in his as he tugged the cloth from your hand

† He dabbed the cloth on the cut on your face

† You had already cleaned it

† But he was using this as an excuse to be close, to look into your eyes

† “You know I wouldn’t have gotten hurt if you’d just stay out of the slayers problems right?”

† Your glare faded a bit, replaced by a hint of guilt

† But it quickly changed to pride when you met his eyes “You know I can’t. They’re my friends”

† A small smile crossed his face as his hand fell away

† Looking down towards the ground “Why’d it have to be you” he muttered, so quiet you almost missed it

† “What?” your heart was beating heavily, and Spike could hear it

† He looked back at you, raising his hand again and taking your chin into his palm as he gently looked into your eyes

† “I said, why did it have to be you” he paused, noticing the confusion in your eyes “If only I could have fallen for someone who wasn’t constantly in danger”

† “Fallen for?”

† You had barely finished the question when Spike pressed a quick yet deep kiss to your lips

† You stared at him, shocked and silent as he smirked at you

† “Well there’s that then”

† You opened your mouth to speak, but found no words, so you just closed your mouth, small pout evident, a blush on your cheeks

† Spike stared at you, amused at your speechlessness before leaning forward and kissing you again

Dating

† Spike never officially asked you out after he kissed you

† It was just kind of obvious to him that you were together now, but not to you

† The others slowly figured it out, or asked you in private

† “Are you and Spike dating?” Willow asked, confusion and awe enveloping her words as Buffy watched on

† “Umm, maybe? I don’t know, it’s hard to tell”

† You honestly had no idea what Spike considered your ‘status’ to be

† Not until one day when Xander saw him flirting with you, and getting a bit to close for comfort

† He noticed that the others weren’t alarmed to he was obviously missing something

† “Hold on a second!” he called out, gaining your attention

† “You two are dating aren’t you?!”

† “Uhh” you hesitated, not sure how to answer. You looked over at Spike, who seemed less than affected by Xanders sudden outburst

† “Took you long enough to figure it out” he calmly responded before turning away to continue what he had been doing previously

† Willow and Buffy chuckled at Xanders obliviousness

† Dating Spike was a mixture of emotions

† He got jealous easy, but usually used it to amuse himself

† Scaring off the intended target, often embarrassing you in the process

† And of course, he was protective a.f. 

† You never went on a hunt alone

† Whether than meant, he went with you (which was his preference), or you were with the others

† When you get hurt, he is angry and scared

† He doesn’t want to lose you, not now, and not like that

† Sometimes this leads to a fight

† But it always ended with him holding you tightly against him, apologizing, as he explained his fears of losing you

† Other times, he liked to tease you and bicker with you over trivial things

† Sometimes he was distant

† But more often than not, he was very soft with you

† Not necessarily around others though, he only what you to see his soft side

† Spike loved to watch you, clean, cook, read, talk, anything

† You were comforting, and so, human.

† You’d be cooking or working on something and suddenly feel his arms wrap around you

† Pressing a kiss to the back of your neck 

† He was a bit more domestic than you’d imagine he’d be, he didn’t really mind washing dishes, or cleaning, or even folding laundry

† It was comforting seeing him be so normal

† Spike would joke that you brought out the ‘human’ in him

† But he wasn’t really joking, you made him want a somewhat normal and domestic life

† Spike knew that you brought a new form of life to him, a new form of soul

† And he would forever be grateful to you

† Spike wasn’t necessarily a verbal person when it came to love, unless you count flirting, which he did a lot

† He wouldn’t really say ‘I love you’ except on important occasions, when he felt it was really needed.

† No words of affection really left his mouth

† He was a more physically affectionate person, even if they were subtle

† But you grew to notice them, and understood the meaning behind them

† The comforting hand on your lower back, the brush of his hand against yours to remind you that he’s there, the quick squeeze of your side as he walks past you meaning he will be right back.

† And when you’re alone, the gentle kisses he places on your head, neck, shoulder, hands, etc..

† Sometimes you’ll wake up to find a single bloom of your favorite flower on the pillow next to yours

† Or he’ll show up late at night with your favorite take-out and a smirk on his face

† All of these show his affection for you