#bro1

he was for it, I was (and always have been) against.

I feel like I know my siblings pretty well, better than they probably realize. I’ve spent my entire life quietly observing everyone around me and filing that shit away. I don’t forget easily.

so when bro6 told me ‘oh [bro1] wouldn’t care. I mean, he smokes weed and does acid.’ I had to just stare at him for a minute, completely gobsmacked.

being... let’s say ‘open-minded’ on one topic doesn’t necessarily transfer to being open-minded about everything. doing drugs doesn’t automatically make someone socially liberal. of course bro1 is chill about drugs, they let him relax and have fun and feel slightly rebellious. he’s also very anti-lgbt. he doesn’t like seeing it, he doesn’t like hearing about it, he regularly wishes death upon particular qu**r people he doesn’t like....... I’m just. amazed bro6 hasn’t noticed any of that.

but then that affects me directly, so of course I’ve been paying attention.

given time and...lots of reading material, I think bro1 could theoretically be accepting of me, but our relationship would never be the same. we’re pretty close and always have been. we have a lot of interests (mostly fandoms) in common, and obviously he’s my weed hookup lmao.... but he also has a temper and can be unpredictable. I was always slightly terrified of him growing up, no matter how well we got along. he never hurt any of us, but I was acutely aware of the possibility. the shit he says about anyone he disagrees with or dislikes for whatever reason are........ cruel and unnecessary. I hate being around him when he’s in that mood. and even when he’s not, I never forget that’s part of him, too.