#boyvsman

Alright. I have a bone to pick with y’all. This all started with a conversation I had with a friend last night regarding the opposite sex. So guys, I’m going to start with you. Oh, but before I do, let me jot down a few disclaimers: 1.) I am not referring to ALL guys here, just the ones that engage in this stupid behavior, and I’m sure you know who you are because you know exactly what you’re doing and when you’re doing it. I doubt anyone engaging in this behavior can claim, “Oh, I didn’t even notice that I was doing that.” 2.) Ladies, don’t think you’re off the hook here just because I said that I am starting with the guys. Because gals, you’re not the innocent victims in this. This game is one of give and take. Ahhh… Now that I got that out of the way, let’s begin shall we?

Guys, this stupid bullshit game of “Let’s see if I can make this girl jealous…” needs to stop. It’s dumb. And when a handful of you do it, it makes all of you seem dumb (guys that aren’t doing this, you need to grab a hold of the ones that are, and slap them around a bit because they’re making you look bad!). Not sure what I am talking about? Okay, how about an example. Let’s say that there is this girl, we shall call her Sally. Sally likes this guy who we shall call Tim. Sally likes Tim, Tim seems to like Sally. They flirt via text, facebook, snap chat, talk on the phone and flirt in their face to face interactions. And it’s not vague flirting like “is he or isn’t he? Does he like me or doesn’t he?” It’s straight forward it-is-completely-obvious-that-he-likes-you kind of flirting. Then Tim pulls the douche move and tells Sally that he thinks that her friend (we’ll call her… Laura). Tim tells Sally, “Ooh your friend is hot! You should give me her number!” What the shit is that? I’ve seen this happen countless times. To me, and to my friends.

So, I decided to consult a guy over this nonsense and get his take on it. As my ex who has pulled this move on me a time or two AND as someone who is brutally honest, I found him to be the best person to ask. I explained the scenario to him and even pointed out how he had done it to me, and then asked him why guys do this. His response: “Treat a girl like shit and you’ll never be able to get rid of her.”

Uh, what? That seems stupid. That couldn’t possibly be right. What dumb girl would fall for such crap? Me, apparently. My friends, apparently. See, when you take that 100% complete focus and attention off of a girl and direct a little of it towards someone else, it makes that first girl wonder what is wrong with her, why this other girl is so much better to be deserving of this guys attention. Then that girl will practically bend over backwards trying to prove why she’s much better than this other random girl. I fell for this in my 20s. Nowadays, not so much. In fact, that little ploy that you guys do BACKFIRES 100% percent of the time. Oh, you think so and so over there is hot? Go for it tiger! Get ya some! And my interest in that guy gets flushed down the toilet because I realize, “oh, he’s that kind of guy.”

I’ve spoke to a few girl friends about this and they have said, “Yeah, I’ve fallen for that ploy, but now I’m starting to see through the bullshit.” So guys, that game works, it definitely works, but we eventually wise up and stop falling for it. You know who’s falling for this game? Dumb girls. Yes, I said it. Dumb girls. And I am allowed to say it because I was once that dumb girl. So what do you end up with? Dumb, naïve, needy girls with low self esteem who are always looking for some kind of reassurance from you- “Is she prettier than me?” “Does this make me look fat?” “Do you love me? Do you love me? PLLLEEEAAASSSEEEE LOVE MEEEEEEEE!” Throw out low quality bait and you’re going to get a low quality catch (I don’t know the first thing about fishing, but the analogy sounded good to me). Play dumb games to catch a girl, you’re going to catch a girl that you’re going to end up not wanting because of that whole needy thing. Then again, there are those guys with the hero complex that need girls to need them to make them feel superior and… well, needed. But that is an entirely separate post that I will get into another time.

See, these are games that BOYS play. Real men don’t do this shit. They know a woman’s worth and will work to win a good woman over by proving themselves worthy- not by playing games to make the girl prove that SHE’S worthy.

Alright, now that I’ve got the talk with the boys done, it’s onto the gals.

Ladies, ladies, ladies. I’m going to try to make this short and sweet. STOP BUYING INTO THIS! If a guy is okay with making you feel like crap by telling you that your best friend is so smoking hot, or try to make you jealous by flirting with your girl friends, he’s not worthy of your amazing presence. So stop. There are over 6 billion people walking around this planet. Do you really think that the one treating you like you’re replaceable is the right guy for you? I’ve seen so many girls being treated like garbage or made to think that they’ll never be as good as their smokin’ hot blonde friend with the legs up to her neck by someone that is not even worthy of her time. So ladies, stop. You deserve better. And until better comes around, have fun, be free, be wild.

Oh, if by chance your idea of having fun is hooking up or having a friend with benefit or whatever, fine. More power to you. As long as you’re being treated like the amazing Goddess that you are.

So, in closing. Guys- Stop playing this ridiculous game. Girls- Stop buying into it.

Thanks!