#boyfraaaan

Then you meet a guy, and everything about you slightly shifts; he sees your guard up, from the last fucker, he sees it and it doesn't scare him, in fact he's able to love you more because of the wall, not in spite of it. He sees you, and he holds onto you, and you have to remember that once upon a time, you knew you were worth a guy like him, you knew you had all this love to give someone, and that you had tried to hand it to someone who was too busy beating his fists against every wall he could, and you, to take it and appreciate it. You remember that even when you were circling the drain, feeling like pond scum, that a part of you was screaming, WE'RE SO MUCH MORE THAN THIS.

You stop feeling sad, and scared and angry and everything that you've barely allowed yourself to feel --and you breathe-- because its nice to breathe in the smell of someone you know isn't going to leave. Its nice to dance in the view of someone who hugs your body like your favourite jeans, its nice to sing with someone who doesn't turn up the radio to drown out your voice. Its nice to be wanted, and to want someone in a way that doesn't leave you with a hollow ache, that only leads you to think you've failed in some way.