#born2lose

cisco if u see this and I hope you don’t but thank u for coming to new york with me because you made me believe in love for the first time despite everything that happened after and every now and then I remember opening the door and seeing you with flowers and knowing you had to run around a city you weren’t familiar with trying to find flowers on Valentine’s Day bro o h my god. and when you kissed me in front of the courthouse you were too sweet

my dad put my dog down today i didn’t think it would have that much of an affect on me but when i woke up this morning and realized that the goodbye i got was sitting on a three way facetime call with my parents and realizing that dog was the only distraction i had from the years of abuse just made me so sad. like it’s so much more than just losing a childhood pet like she would literally stop my dad from beating me and there were so many nights when i’d calll my mom crying to pick me up and she would tell me she couldn’t and it would just be me and my dog locked in the bathroom until it was time for me to go to school again and like i repressed so much of my childhood i hate that it’s coming back i don’t want to think about it