#bone jar

Bone jar

There is a bone jar in the kitchen, or there WAS a bone jar, the jar has since been cleaned of bones and now has lemons, but I do not want a lemon because I don’t want to bite into the juicy yellow fruit and taste blench and bone. 

When someone goes downstairs the parental figures will declare ‘A body!’ upon your entry, do not be afraid, make a hissing sound or noise of agreement. They accept both. 

The mother figure will be happy after an outing, stating you have been ‘watered and fed’ you no longer find amusement from this phrase and now feel fear, what are they planning?

You are not meant to feed the dogs at the table, but if one was to put a dog on the table everyone is instantly excited and forgets the rule. If a dog sits on a chair they have to be given a place-mat. 

The mother always wants to craft her ideas, but never does, she is always working on them but hasn’t completed a single one. She currently wants to make a bone chandelier from the remains of the bone jar. ‘This requires more bones’ she said. 

Everyone in the family will forget what you have said within a week, so say whatever, except swear words, they will remember those.

Your eldest brother compliments you on your dough rolling abilities, it has been a tough weak, this is the highlight of the month. ‘Fucking sick dude, great job.’ Feels amazing. He is the only one excluded from the no swearing rule.