#bltt

It took quite a few moments for her groggy brain to register who that voice belonged to, but when it did, her eyes flew open, only for her to shut them again when she was met with a bright, blinding light.

She groaned into the pillow as a flash of pain shot through her head. She tried her best to remember why she was feeling like this, why her limbs ached and her head pounded, and why Maggie of all people was there, but she came back completely blank.

“Why do I feel like I’ve just been hit by a bus?” She asked. Her voice was hoarse, the last few words coming out in a whisper, and she wondered if Maggie had even heard her.

“It’s called a hangover, Danvers.” Maggie stated and even though Alex couldn’t see her face, she knew she was wearing an amused grin.

Alex groaned into the pillow again. “How drunk was I?”

“Shitfaced.”

Another groan.

She could her Maggie chuckle. “Come on, I made you breakfast.”

Alex opened her eyes again, this time carefully, to look up at Maggie standing in her room, wearing a messy bun and sweatpants, her sweatpants, arms crossed, and surely that amused grin on her face.

Alex didn’t want to stare, something she was basically already doing because my god did Maggie look gorgeous, so she shut her eyes again and simply grunted as a response. She didn’t want to get up, especially if that meant facing Maggie wearing her clothes, but she knew she would have to eventually so after a few moments she sighed in defeat.

“Fine.” She mumbled as she opened her eyes again and Maggie nodded with a content smile before heading out of the room.

It took a few minutes for Alex to actually get herself out of bed. Everything felt heavy, her head, her limbs, and she momentarily considered just getting back under the covers and pretend Maggie wasn’t there and that she wasn’t an adult with responsibilities, but then she noticed the smell of food, of breakfast, and changed her mind.

“Is that bacon?” Alex asked as she dragged herself out of her bedroom and into the kitchen. Maggie looked up from the stove, locked eyes with her and immediately smiled.

“Sure is.” She said. “It’ll help you hangover.”

Alex’s stomach both twisted and growled at the intense and almost overwhelming smell of it, but she ignored her rising nausea and sat down on one of the barstools.

They ate in silence. It wasn’t an awkward silence, but it wasn’t really a comfortable one either. Alex occasionally not-so-smoothly stole a glance at Maggie and Maggie occupied herself with what seemed like police reports while she played around with the food on her plate, occasionally taking a bite.

By now it had dawned on Alex that the last time she’d seen Maggie – or at least the last time she remembered – had been that night at the alien bar, when she’d kissed Maggie, and when Maggie had turned her down, when Maggie had broken her heart. Since then she’d ignored her, basically shut her out of her life, and she was sure Maggie would at least have something to say about that, and maybe even be somewhat mad at her for it. And so she wondered what had happened the night before that made Maggie seem so friendly and calm, and that had caused her to be here, eating breakfast with her, wearing her clothes. She wondered how drunk she’d really been and what she’d done while drunk. Oh god, what had she done?

“What’s on your mind, Danvers?” Alex was pulled out of her thoughts and she looked up to see Maggie looking at her, eyebrow raised, that amused grin on her face.

For a few moments Alex wasn’t able to form actual words, all she could do was stare back. She blamed it on her headache, on the hangover, and not on the intensity of Maggie’s gaze or on the deep color of her eyes, because that definitely didn’t have anything to do with it.

“I- uh, I didn’t do anything stupid, did I?” She managed to get out and Maggie shook her head.

“No, don’t worry.” She said.

Alex nodded and turned her attention back to her plate. That only answered one question. She still didn’t know what Maggie was doing here and although she really didn’t want to ask, she really did want to know.

“But how come you’re here?” The question seemed to come as a surprise and Maggie looked at her for a brief moment, considering her, before putting away her papers and telling Alex all about the night before, how she’d gotten a call from M’gann about her, picked her up and taken her home, how Alex been all cocky and whiny and how Maggie had managed to get her “drunk ass” to her apartment and into bed.

And all Alex could do was shake her head and bury her face in her hands in embarrassment.

“God, I’m so sorry.” Alex mumbled, her cheeks glowing red behind her hands and Maggie laughed.

“It’s fine, I’ve dealt with worse.” She said, but it changed nothing for Alex, she knew how she could be when she was drunk.

Maggie eventually collected the dishes and placed a glass of water along with two aspirins in front of Alex and ordered for her to take them, before disappearing into the bathroom.

And Alex looked at her as she walked away, smiling to herself, thinking of how domestic-y all of this is and immediately cursing at herself for having such thoughts.

She really needed to get her shit together.

Twenty minutes later they left for work, which Alex was two hours late to.

Luckily J’onn wasn’t too mad, only a little worried since she was almost never late, and he simply told her to get to work. She was put on lab duty for the day, which, considering her hangover, she didn’t mind.

It was a relatively peaceful day in national city, no aliens causing trouble or trying to murder anyone, which had left Supergirl relatively bored. And so she had joined Alex in the lab, because she too wanted to do “science-y stuff for once”.

But since there was no way Alex was going to let her lasers-shooting-from-her-eyes-superhero-and-yet-ironically-clumsy-sister come close to any of the highly flammable contents, she told her to simply clean the beakers and petri dishes. Kara wasn’t very pleased with that.

“Can I look through the thingy now?” Kara asked from where she was washing the cups, hands (and face) covered in soapy bubbles.

Alex looked up at her. “You mean the microscope?” She deadpanned.

“Yes.” Kara said. “Please.”

Alex sighed to herself, not able to resist Kara’s stupid pout. “Fine.” She said.

Kara almost squealed in excitement and pulled her hands out of the tub, drying them on a towel.

She walked over to Alex, who motioned for her to be careful, before looking through the lens.

“Oooh.” She drew, amazed. Alex grinned to herself. The girl was from freaking space, yet she was amazed by a couple of blood cells. “What am I seeing exactly?”

“Blood cells from that hellgrammite you caught last week. We’re analyzing it to see if it could do any damage if another organism were to come in contact with it.”

“Cool.” Was all Kara said as she continued to look through the microscope, seemingly utterly fascinated, still.

Alex heard her phone buzz. It was next to her on the table and it showed a text message from Maggie asking her how she was doing. It was the third one she’d gotten so far. Also the third one she’d ignored.

Frankly, she didn’t really feel like replying. Maggie had saved her from some possibly embarrassing situations the night before, yes, but Alex sure wasn’t sure what to think of her, of their… situation.

Everything that had happened at the alien bar that night had messed Alex up quite a lot and the fact that Maggie didn’t seem to want to talk about it, the fact that Maggie seemed to be pretending that it had never even happened, frustrated Alex. She didn’t want to lose Maggie, and it looked as though Maggie didn’t want that either, but if she was going to pretend everything was okay when it simply wasn’t, Alex didn’t know if she wanted to pursue this friendship? any further.

However much it stung.

And so Alex unlocked her phone, only to immediately lock it again so it would stop notifying her.

“Who was that from?” Kara asked as she briefly looked up.

Alex swallowed.

“Oh, just Maggie asking about something.” She said. “Wanna see more blood cells?”

Alex went to replace the petri dish with a different one but halted when Kara spoke.

“Alex.” She simply said, nothing else. She was giving her a pointed look, one that said don’t try to change the subject and Alex looked back at her for a bit, before looking down at her hands. “Have you guys talked about it yet?” Kara asked.

Alex just shook her head, unable to look at her sister.

“Then talk.” Kara said. It was almost a plead. “I see how much this is killing you, Alex.”

Alex finally did look up at her, and her eyes were sad, yet kind and full of sympathy.

“I’m not sure if she wants to talk about it.” She said truthfully.

“She hurt you, Alex.” Kara said, her voice stern. “I was there, remember? I know how heartbroken you were, how heartbroken you are.”

Alex let out a shaky breath.

“I- I don’t-”

“Tell her how you feel, how much she hurt you. Force her to talk about it. She owes you that much.”  

Kara was right. Alex knew she was right. Even though Maggie had had every right to turn her down, she had hurt her, and denying that, or rather simply ignoring that, really wasn’t right on Maggie’s part.

Especially considering the situation. Maggie wasn’t just some woman Alex had poured her heart out to, she was the first woman she’d ever poured her heart out to. She was the reason Alex had been so confused, so upset, the reason she’d spent nights awake thinking and thinking, the reason she’d come to terms with her sexuality, the reason she’d actually come out. The fact that Maggie was ignoring all of that made her angry. Or maybe frustrated was a better way to describe it.

Alex knew she couldn’t change the fact that Maggie didn’t want her, but perhaps talking about it would help her heal, and maybe relieve some of the tension between them. Though, it could also easily ruin the thing that they still had together. Going along with what Maggie was doing, simply ignoring it and pretending it never happened, seemed like the easier and safer choice.

Though, Alex knew communication was important in any relationship, whether platonic or romantic.

“I don’t know.” Alex said. “I’ll think about it.”

And she did. For a long time. So long in fact, that a full week went by without either of them talking to each other. The only time they’d actually seen each other was at a crime scene downtown, which had been quite awkward.

Maggie had tried to make eye contact with Alex, she’d tried to start a conversation but Alex hadn’t complied, had simply focused on the case, only addressing Maggie when she had to and only in a strictly professional way.

It wasn’t that Alex didn’t want to talk. She did. She simply didn’t know how, she wasn’t very good with words. So every time she planned on doing so or was given the chance to, she chickened out last minute.

And so seven days went by without really hearing from Maggie, or even hearing her name for that matter. That was, until one game night at Kara’s place, Kara so occasionally dropped it.

Alex was stirring the batter for the cupcakes while Kara took the first batch out of the oven, the sound of Winn and James arguing over what game they were gonna play first in the background.

“-and until Maggie gets here to-”

“I’m sorry.” Alex interrupted her, pausing the stirring, “until who now gets here?”

Kara looked up at her from the counter where she was displaying the freshly baked cupcakes, eyes all innocent.

“Until Maggie gets here.” She said as if it were the most normal thing in the world.

Alex looked at her sister for a moment, wide-eyed.

“You invited Maggie?” She hissed. Kara didn’t even flinch.

“Yeah.” She stated.

“Uhm, why?”

“Because she’s a friend.” Kara argued.

Alex just stared at her, look of disbelief plastered onto her face. She couldn’t believe this. Why on earth would Kara think it was okay to invite Maggie to game night?

“I don’t know if you’ve paid attention the past couple of weeks, but she’s not exactly my friend.”

Before Kara could say anything in return, she was interrupted by James walking into the kitchen.

“She is kind of my friend.” He said, seeming a bit hesitant to interrupt. “Well, the guardian’s.”

And now Alex was staring at the both of them.

“Since when?!”

James opened his mouth a couple of times to speak, but nothing came out. Alex knew he was intimidated by her, basically everyone was when she was angry, really angry, so after a few moments of him just fumbling and stumbling over his words, he simply retreated back to the living room, back to discussing board games with Winn.

Alex pinched the bridge of her nose as she tried to get her breathing under control. This fun night was about to turn into a nightmare and she wasn’t sure if she could deal with that at the moment.

She glanced back up at Kara, who was still looking at her all innocent as she was eating one of the cupcakes and Alex sighed, deeply. She could see, under those oblivious and cute puppy eyes of hers, that Kara was grinning, laughing maybe even, because she damn well knew what she’d done.

“You did this on purpose.” Alex muttered and she could see a flash of amusement pass across Kara’s face.

“You have no proof of that.” She simply said before taking another bite of the cupcake and flashing a fake, sweet smile at her.

“I hate you.”

“You love me.”

Alex grunted at her, muttering swear words under her breath, before simply continuing to help her with the cupcakes. She knew Kara was just looking out for her, that she was trying to find a way to force her and Maggie to talk things out, but right now Alex really wanted to punch her. Kara was lucky she was Kryptonian.

Alex considered leaving, to flee the apartment before Maggie got there, but she didn’t really get a chance to, because only a few minutes later there was a knock at the door.

Shit.

Kara went to pull it open and was greeted by a smiling Maggie, dimples and all, followed by J’onn, and Alex wondered if suddenly everyone had befriended her without her knowing about it.

She leaned back against the kitchen counter, arms crossed, face stern, trying her best to focus on anything other than Maggie. She failed though, and the second she accidentally glanced up at her, they immediately locked eyes.

Maggie gave her a bit of a hesitant smile, one Alex barely returned, before heading over to the living room to greet the others.

And even though Alex hadn’t looked at her for very long, she’d noticed the exhaustion in her features and the bags under her eyes. She wondered if those were her doing, if this was getting to Maggie as much as it was getting to her.

Maggie settled in the living room, joining the board game discussion, and Alex remained in the kitchen, not even daring to even so much as look at them. Kara eventually returned to her, to help her with the last batch of cupcakes.

Once the last of the baked goods were out of the oven, Alex was inevitably forced to join the group around the coffee table for a round of Monopoly.

To say it was awkward was definitely an understatement.

Alex was quiet, and despite Maggie’s attempts to get her to at least look at her, to try to get her involved in the game, Alex remained quiet, distant.

And the tension to build by the second.

The others seemed to catch up on it as well, because even though they were laughing and whining like tiny children every time they had to pay, they’d occasionally exchange confused glances.

But Alex simply sipped her wine, only speaking or moving when she had to and she ignored the pointed looks Kara was giving her. She wasn’t in the mood for this.

After Winn lost another two hundred bucks to J’onn, much to his displeasure since he’d picked the game, it was Alex’s turn again.

She rolled the dice and ended up on Tennessee Avenue. “Ha! That’s me.” Maggie laughed. “Pay time, Danvers.”

Everyone seemed to be holding their breaths as Alex handed over the money, and Alex suppressed the urge to roll their eyes at them.

“I’m just gonna buy myself a nice little hotel and continue beating the crap out of all of you.” Maggie snickered and everyone simply grunted as a response.

“I’m pretty sure you’ve already done enough damage.”

The words were out before Alex could stop herself and the room went quiet.

She hadn’t been talking about the game, and Alex was pretty sure they all knew that. Everyone, including Maggie, who was looking at her with the saddest, most hurt eyes Alex had ever seen and she wanted to take it back, god, how she wanted to take it back but before she could even open her mouth, Kara snapped.

“Okay, that’s it.” She jumped up and grabbed Alex by the arm, hoisting her up and in turn grabbing Maggie by the arm and dragging them both down the hall.

“Kara!” Alex protested. “What the hell!”

But Kara ignored her and damnit it were times like these when Alex wished her sister wasn’t so goddamn strong.

Kara shoved both of them into her bedroom, flicked on the lights and gave them a pointed look.

“Talk.” She said.

And then she was gone.

Alex stared at the closed door for what felt like eternity, processing what had just happened, what was about to happen, before taking a deep breath and crossing her arms.

Minutes and minutes passed, before she dared to even look at Maggie.

She was standing there, head duck and arms crossed tightly around her chest, and she looked so small, so fragile, something Alex wasn’t used to seeing, and the longer she looked, the more her anger faded.

Maggie seemed hurt. She was hurt.

Alex had been so caught up in her own pain, her own thoughts, in what all of this was doing to her, that she hadn’t even stopped to think about what this was doing to Maggie, how everything that had happened was affecting her. Because of course this was hurting her, too. They hadn’t known each other that long, but they’d build something together, something that was now basically gone, and that ought to cause pain, to both of them.

And she didn’t want Maggie to hurt. God, that was the last thing she wanted.

“I’m sorry.” She said. It seemed like the best way to start this.

Maggie snapped her head up, confused.

“For what?” She asked. Her voice was unsteady, small, and it made something inside Alex’s chest ache.

“For what I said earlier. And for ignoring you.”

Maggie’s eyes were searching her intensely, searching for something, though Alex wasn’t quite sure what it was.

Eventually she seemed to accept it, nodding, releasing some of the tension in her shoulders. It went quiet for a while, neither of them sure what to say, before both of them spoke.

“Alex-”

“You hurt me.”

Maggie tightly shut her mouth, her eyes darting between Alex’s, and she visibly swallowed.

“I know.” She said.

“And then you played it off like it never happened.”

She swallowed again.

“I know.” She said. She sighed. “Alex, I-”

“I can’t keep pretending everything is okay when it isn’t, Maggie. It might work for you but it doesn’t for me. I just can’t-”

“Alex-”

“After everything, after all of it, I thought that- that you-” She couldn’t find the words, a lump forming in her throat, and this time Maggie didn’t try to interrupt her. She seemed to know what Alex was referring to. “I kissed you, Maggie. I kissed you, and you weren’t even that fazed by it, it’s like you don’t even ever think about it-”

“It’s all I think about.”

The words caught Alex off guard. She wasn’t sure what to say to that, so she just stared, processing and processing, while Maggie avoided her gaze, and Alex could feel her entire body go into to turmoil.

“Then what the hell, Maggie?!” She finally snapped.

Maggie took a few deep breaths while she seemingly tried to collect her thoughts, wringing her hands together, eyes darting all over the room.

And Alex simply continued to look at her, waiting for an explanation.

Maggie opened her mouth a few times to speak, only to close it again when nothing came out. Eventually she sighed, running a hand through her hair, and spoke.

“I like you, Alex.” She said, followed by a small, nervous smile. “I like you so much it scares the crap out of me. But you have got to understand that now simply isn’t the right time. I mean, I just got dumped.” She tried to play it off with a light chuckle as if it were somehow funny, but Alex saw how heavy the meaning of those words really was, how much it stung.

“Maggie-”

“And I meant it when I said that things are too new for you, that you should experience things for yourself first. I’ve tried those relationships, they never end well.”

She took another deep breath. Alex could see how her thoughts were roaming her brain, how she was trying her best to put them together.

“And I- I can’t have that happen with us, Alex, I can’t have you leaving. I- I don’t think I’d be able to handle that.”

It sounded like a plead, and perhaps it was. She was asking for her to stay, to please give it time and to please not go. Alex thought about it and she could feel her heart pounding. She looked at the woman in front of her, the woman she knew she was practically already falling in love with and she sighed. She knew she could never say no, that she could never leave, even if she wanted to.

And so she nodded, slowly but surely, agreeing that she would stay, that she would give it time, however hard that may be.

Maggie seemed to relax, only just slightly, and she nodded as well.

“So, now what?” Alex asked.

Maggie looked at her, offering a smile.

“I want to be your friend.” She said. “And I’m sorry for everything, I really am.”

Alex looked back, letting her eyes dart between Maggie’s. She really was sorry, Alex knew that. The glint of worry, of hope she saw only confirmed that.

And so Alex nodded once again, accepting the apology, along with the request to be friends, and silence settled around the room for a bit. It was a strangely comfortable silence.

“We should- uhm,” Alex started, “we should probably get back to the game.” She motioned towards the door.

“Right.”

“You know, the game I was kicking your ass at.”

Maggie grinned, gaping at her.

“You were not.”

“We’ll see about that, Sawyer.”

They exchanged smiles for a moment, smiles that said so much, smiles that said they’d be okay, before they headed out the room.

When they got back, everyone’s heads turned, all concerned, worried faces that quickly faded when they realized that things were good, that things were alright again.

Kara was smiling at Alex from the kitchen, hopeful glint in her eyes, and Alex walked over to her.

She smacked her on the arm, as hard as she could because the girl was made of steel and Alex wanted her to know how pissed she was at her.

“Ow!” Kara whined.

“That was for being a shithead and doing that to me.”

Kara pouted up at her as she rubbed her arm but before she could say anything about it, Alex went in for a tight, warm hug.

Alex had left shortly after, all teary eyes and sunken shoulders, and Maggie had waited for her to perhaps return for hours, but she never did. Eventually Maggie had just gone back to her apartment, and it had taken her three sleepless nights and two and a half bottles of whisky to get the feeling of Alex’s lips along with that sad, teary eyed, hurt face out of her head.

The truth was, she did like Alex. In fact, she liked Alex a whole lot. Not liking her was definitely not the reason she’d turned her down, although she was quite sure that that was all that Alex was thinking. No, she’d meant it when she said that the circumstances simply weren’t right, with Alex fresh out of the closet and herself fresh out of a relationship. She didn’t want to be an experiment and she didn’t want Alex to become a rebound. Alex meant too much to her.

Nevertheless, she’d hurt her. She knew she had. And even though she knew Alex was strong, and that she’d get over it at some point, she couldn’t help feeling sick to her stomach every time she pictured Alex’s face. That sweet, excited, innocent face that Maggie had said no to. That face that had gone from happy to confused to utterly sad and hurt within a matter of seconds, all because of her.

I feel like a kid again.

I have you.

I’ve been wanting to do that.

It made her want to puke.

And Alex, she’d gone radio silent. Maggie had tried contacting her, calling her, texting her, trying to make sure she was alright, but Alex had ignored all of it. Maggie understood, though. She got that Alex wanted to keep a distance and she knew she needed space, that time would perhaps heal the wounds, and that she shouldn’t push her. So she didn’t.

However, she was worried that space and time would not be enough. Maybe Alex wouldn’t come back, maybe she wouldn’t want anything to do with her anymore.

The thought terrified Maggie.

So, she waited and hoped and hoped that Alex would eventually come around, that she’d be her friend again.

And when one night M’gann texted her that Alex was at the alien bar, drunk, shitface drunk, and that Maggie should probably come and get her before she got herself into any trouble, she didn’t hesitate.

She got there within record time and when she walked in, M’gann greeted her from behind the bar.

“Corner.” She said as she nodded towards the back of the room, where surely Alex was, hung over a table, body sunk in a chair, head resting in her arms and eyes closed.

Maggie shook her head at the sight, thanked M’gann and walked over.

Her presence went unnoticed and for a moment Maggie wasn’t even sure if Alex was still conscious, because judging by the amount of empty glasses on the table in front of her, she could’ve easily been gone.

“Danvers.” Maggie spoke and Alex immediately shot up.

Nope, she was still there.

She seemed confused for a second, blinking heavily and trying to get her eyes to focus, but when she noticed Maggie, she seemed to perk up.

“Hey, look it’s Maggie Sawyer! Mag- Maggie Sawyer.” She was mumbling, stumbling over her words and then she was giggling to herself, laughing almost, as if she’d just made some hilarious joke and Maggie swallowed.

Maybe coming here was a bad idea.

“What are you doing here, Danvers?” She asked and it took a few moments for Alex to process the question.

“Oh,” she started, “you know, drinking my problems away, just like last night, and the night before that, and the night before…” She trailed off and suddenly seemed utterly interested in one of the empty glasses in front of her, studying it as if it were the most fascinating thing in the entire fucking universe.

Maggie swallowed again. She was fairly certain that she was the reason behind all this. It was like a punch in the gut.

“Care for a ride home?” She asked and it got Alex’s focus off of the empty beer glass.

“No, no. I’m fi- fine.” Alex assured her while making dismissive hand gestures. “I’ll walk. Yeah, walking’s good.”

She continued mumbling and Maggie sighed. She really wasn’t in the mood to argue with a drunk Alex right now.

“Alex, you wouldn’t even be able to stand.” She stated as she crossed her arms over her chest.

Alex looked at her, almost offended, before clumsily moving her chair backwards.

“S-sure I can.” She said, determined to prove herself.

Maggie shook her head, although more to herself than to Alex. This wasn’t gonna go well.

Alex actually managed to lift herself up from the chair, although not without difficulty, and stand up. But when she tried to take a step she lost her balance, and Maggie managed to catch her before she went face down to the floor.

“Okay.” Maggie said as she tried to keep both of them steady. “I’m taking you home.”

Alex mumbled something inaudible that seemed a lot like the words no, I’m fine in return but Maggie wasn’t having any of it. She was taking her with her, whether she liked it or not.

She swung one of Alex’s arms around her neck and one of her own arms around Alex’s back to keep her up, and suddenly Alex was close, really close.

“You’re really pretty, you know that?” Alex mumbled as she looked up at her and Maggie could feel Alex’s breath on her neck, on her face, and it took every fiber in her body not to combust.

“You’re not helping, Alex.” She said as she continued to guide the both of them towards the back entrance. Alex seemed to ignore it.

“Like, beautiful.” She said. “So beautiful.” She giggled to herself as her eyes continued to sweep all over Maggie’s face, and Maggie tried her hardest to simply focus on keeping both of them upright, to get Alex out of the bar and back home.

She barely managed.

On the way out she thanked M’gann again, who in return simply shot her a sympathetic look, and before she knew it they were outside and Alex was in her car’s front seat.

“I’m fine.” Alex mumbled again, but Maggie simply ignored it and shut the door.

The drive to Alex’s apartment was mostly quiet. Apart from the few mumbles and giggles, Alex seemed to be dozing off. Maggie really didn’t mind. She didn’t think she’d be able to handle any more of her drunken compliments.

When they finally arrived, Alex regained consciousness.

“Hey- hey, that’s my apartment.” She mumbled while she glanced out the window, as if she’d just made the discovery of a lifetime.

Maggie unbuckled her seatbelt. “Sure is, Danvers.” She said before getting out of the car.

When she got to Alex, she held out a hand for her to take, but Alex simply looked at her with a bit of a pained expression.

“Carry me.” She said.

“Danvers, I’m not going to carry you.” Maggie deadpanned but Alex didn’t seem satisfied with that.

“Please.” She whined, and the pout she was making almost convinced Maggie to actually carry a drunk Alex freaking Danvers up to her apartment. Almost.

“Take my hand or stay here the rest of the night. I don’t care which.”

She did care which, but Alex didn’t need to know that.

Alex simply scolded up at her before finally taking her hand and letting herself get dragged out of the car and up to her apartment.

When they got upstairs, Alex seemed to have become less chatty, less giggly. Instead, she was quiet and not all that aware. Once inside, Maggie went to guide Alex to the couch so that she could rest her head for a bit and not feel as crappy as Maggie imaged she was feeling at that moment, but before she got the chance, Alex stopped her.

“I’m pretty sure I need to throw up.” She mumbled.

So Maggie took her to the bathroom, and surely Alex puked her guts out, and Maggie held her hair back and stroked her head, all while reassuring her that it was okay, that she’d be okay and that tomorrow things would be better. And when Alex was done, she sunk back onto the tiled floor, exhausted, completely worn out and Maggie sat across from her and held her hand, rubbing her thumb over her knuckles, trying her best to comfort her, to make her feel somewhat better.

And Alex stared, at nothing, for what felt like hours.

“What is wrong with me?” She suddenly mumbled. Her eyes locked with Maggie’s and something inside Maggie’s chest stung at how empty and yet full of everything they looked. She hated seeing Alex like that, like this. She didn’t want Alex to think anything was wrong with her, because Alex was everything. She was everything and so much more.

“Nothing’s wrong with you, Alex.”

“Then why don’t you want me?”

The question made Maggie’s stomach twist and churn until she was sure she herself was about to throw up. She was the reason for this, she was the reason Alex was in this state, on her bathroom floor, drunk an exhausted and in such pain, looking at her with those sad and tired eyes, and Maggie wanted to scream and puke and cry and scream again.

“Alex…” Was all she managed to get out and it were times like these when she wished she was better with words.

Alex’s eyes shifted back to the wall in front of her. She looked completely and utterly defeated, and it took everything for Maggie to not just take her in her arms and kiss her and tell her how she really felt. It wouldn’t have been right for so many reasons.

Alex suddenly flinched.

“Everything’s spinning.” She murmured as she tightly shut her eyes and it took a few seconds for Maggie to process what she’d said.

Finally, she snapped out of her roaming thoughts and jumped to her feet. Making sure Alex was okay was what was important right now.

And so she guided Alex out of her bathroom and into her bedroom, slowly letting her sink onto her bed, telling her to not lie down just yet.

She disappeared out of the room and returned a few moments later with a bottle of water and some aspirins.

“Take these.” She ordered as she handed them over. “And the entire bottle. You’ll thank me in the morning.” She grinned slightly and to her surprise Alex showed somewhat of a grin herself, and she hoped and hoped that maybe they’d be okay after all.

Once Alex finally got to lay down, a long, exhausted sigh escaped her lips and she let her eyes fall close, her body visibly relaxing.

Maggie sat down next to her on the edge of the bed, small smile briefly appearing on her face. She grabbed the folded blanket that lay underneath the nightstand and covered Alex with it, tugging her in, making sure she wouldn’t be cold.

She could see Alex’s lips curl upwards just slightly, and when she went to gently remove some of her locks from her face, Alex opened her eyes again.

“Thank you.” She murmured, and Maggie smiled down at her, at the soft look in her eyes, before bringing her hand up to caress her face ever so lightly.

“Anytime.” She said as Alex’s eyes fluttered shut again.

They may have not be on the best of terms, but Maggie had promised she’d be there for her, that she’d be her friend. And she intended on keeping that promise.

When she got up to shut the room’s curtains and to maybe get another bottle of water for in the morning, Alex spoke again.

“Stay.” She pleaded, and when Maggie turned around to face her, she was met with innocent and vulnerable eyes looking up at her, asking her.

She was about to tell her that she really shouldn’t, that it probably wasn’t a good idea. But something in that look told her that Alex wasn’t trying anything, that she was simply asking for a friend, and so Maggie nodded.

“Of course.” She said softly.

She walked around the bed and lay down on the other side as Alex rolled onto her back to face her, and Maggie could see her eyes following her as she got under the blanket with her.

“Thank you.” Alex murmured again while she blinked slowly, heavily, obviously trying her hardest to stay awake. Maggie propped her head up on her elbow and simply smiled down at her.

“Go to sleep, Danvers.” She said.

Alex’s eyes finally fell shut, and after a few moments her features softened and her breathing evened out. And Maggie watched her, for minutes on end, watched her simply breathe peacefully, quietly, until she was sure she’d fallen asleep.

“Someday,” she whispered as her eyes caressed every single inch of Alex’s face, admiring her, taking her in, “the timing will be right.”