#blayes

It was late, maybe early, he didn’t know. Raven was still asleep, snoring softly next to him with a small puddle of drool on her lavender sheets. He gave her a soft smile and kissed her shoulder, then her rib cage, noticing she had discarded her shirt sometime in the middle of the night. Wells was gone, on vacation for two weeks with his family, leaving the house to Raven to do whatever she pleased. Apparently that meant forcing Bellamy to spend every night with her because the house was ‘scary’ by herself. Not that he was complaining. He headed into the bathroom after placing his glasses on his face to wash his face with some soy-based cleanser than smelled like lemon Raven had in her cabinet.

Looking in the mirror, he ran his hands over his face, deciding not to shave for the day—then something caught his eye. He pushed his hair from his face, finding a single, stark silver hair. Bellamy plucked it from his hairline and stared at it in his palm, seeming to glow against the gold in his skin.

“Bellamy?”

He jumped at the sound of Raven’s voice behind him, and she stood in the bathroom doorway, rubbing her right eye free of sleep. “Hey, babe. What’re you doin’ out of bed?” He questioned.

“I heard you get up.” She leaned against the doorway. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine. Can’t sleep. I’m gonna go for a run—you want anything from the store while I’m out?”

“I think we’re good. I’ll text you if I discover we’re out of something.”

Bellamy went towards her and kissed her cheek. “I’ll see you soon.”

The minute he was outside, he hailed a cab and watched as people got their day started, rushing towards cabs and subway stairwells, talking on phones and scarfing down breakfast sandwiches.

“Here you are, sir.” The cab driver announced, gesturing to the Starbucks they were parked in front of.

“Thanks, man.” Bellamy tossed him a twenty and slid out, opening up the door to find that the coffee shop was only inhabited by a few patrons.

“Bellamy!” He heard from behind the counter, and Clarke beamed a bright, white smile. “How are you?”

“Hey, I’m good.” He mirrored her smile, brushing his hair out of his eyes.

“What can I get for ya?”

“Venti Americano with an extra shot if you don’t mind,”

She chuckled. “One of those days, huh?” She moved over to the machine and got to work, brewing the espresso. “How’s Raven doing?”

Bellamy leaned against the counter. “A lot better. The physical therapy is going well and she’s walking well on her own. Still on the crutches though.”

Clarke let out a sigh. “Body needs time to heal. My mom was talking about her last night, was wondering how she was doing.” It was by pure coincidence that Bellamy and Raven discovered that Clarke’s mother was the responding physician after Raven’s car accident. Despite how large the city was, New York could often be a tiny bubble when it came to population interaction. “Hey, you got a minute? I’m about to go on my thirty, I’d love to catch up some more.”

“Yeah, I got time.” He nodded, sliding over a ten dollar bill. “I’ll go hang out outside at a table.”

“Great, I’ll meet you out there.”

The morning was a bit chilly, but nothing a warm drink and a light jacket couldn’t fix. Bellamy leaned back in the metal chair and propped his ankle on top of his knee, enjoying the sounds of the city until the sound of a gate shutting brought his attention to the petite blonde making her way towards him. She uncapped a venti-sized cup and inhaled the scent of her coffee with a happy smile.

“First one of the morning?” He questioned.

“Oh god no, it’s my fifth. I’ve been here since five o’clock in the morning.” Clarke laughed, letting her hair down from its bun, which revealed some fading pink tips in her golden locks. “What prompted the visit?”

“Haven’t seen you around. You and Lexa holed up somewhere having a honeymoon?”

She chuckled. “I wish, no, I’ve been so busy. School’s finishing up and I’ve been so stressed with everything…” Clarke trailed off, brushing her fingertip around the mouth of her cup. “Lexa and I have been fighting, nothing super bad but it’s enough, enough to…”

“Bother you.” He nodded. “Yeah, she mentioned you guys were hittin’ a rough patch.” Clarke frowned. “Nothing bad.” Bellamy assured her, leaning forward. “Lexa’s…as sad as this sounds, she’s not used to this. Neither of us are.”

“Used to what?”

“Being happy and okay.” Bellamy let out a sad laugh. “She’s had a crush on you for so long. You know she blew through a chunk of her savings just going to Starbucks to see you.”

A smile spread across Clarke’s pink-painted lips, the color almost matching her dyed ends. “She told me about that. She’s such a dork.” The girl let out a long sigh, picking at the cherry red polish on her thumb nail for a moment in thought. “I want to take things further…you know, introduce her to my mom and my stepdad—which she’s all for, she’d love to meet her formally but…”

“But what?”

“Whenever I bring up her family, you know, suggesting we go meet them…she shuts down.”

He nodded. “That part of Lexa’s life is complicated.” Mostly because everyone she’s ever known, loved, or had a familial connection to is dead and has been dead for centuries, his mind finished for him. “She’s…a tough one, Clarke. I’m gonna be honest with you. Your best bet is to wait for her to break down her own walls then try to do it yourself.”

A shrug lifted her shoulders, and then she let out a sigh “I mean, you know her best.” Clarke lifted her gaze to meet his. “Thanks for talking to me about this, Bell. I know it must be weird—”

“It’s not. Lexa’s my sister. We’ve been like that for years. We’re bound to talk about each other.”

“You know, Bell, they’re both lucky to have you. Raven and Lexa.”

The statement brought a smile to his face. “I’m the lucky one. I was so lost and I found Lexa…in the strangest of places, but I found her. She found me. Raven….I feel like I had been looking for her for ages and there she was.”

“Like the sun coming out from behind clouds,”

“Exactly. Very poetic of you, Clarke.”

She blushed. “What can I say? I’m a moody art student.” Taking a long sip of her coffee, she tipped her head back and finished it off. “I gotta head back, but thank you for the visit.”

“No problem.” Bellamy stood up and pulled the girl into a hug. “I’ll see you around, Griffin.”

“Right back at’cha, Blake.”

Bellamy hailed another cab, and the minute he slid into the interior, his cell phone rang with a picture of Raven at the Intrepid Air, Space and Sea Museum. “Hey, baby.” He greeted her warmly.

“Bell, I need coffee, a bacon and spinach omelet from Freddy’s and a foot rub.”

He chuckled. “Anything else I can get you, Princess Raven?”

“A kiss too, if you’d like—but! I’m leaving the apartment, I gotta stop by the shop real quick and since your place is closer, can we stay there tonight?”

“Sure,” He nodded. “I’ll see you soon, be safe.”

“See ya.”

Bellamy ran his errands, remembering half way through ordering breakfast that he needed some groceries, so he stopped by the bodega and took the long way home. He made it up to his apartment with all his bags in one trip, though, a silent victory. When he entered the apartment, he called out a greeting for Raven and she came out from his bedroom, limping until she leaned against the separation wall.

“Hey, gorgeous.” Dropping a bag on the counter, he smiled. “Bake n’ spin omelet and a large coffee. Got some groceries too. I was thinking we could stay in tonight and watch a movie, unless you got plans?”

“I don’t.” Raven said softly, but something in her voice startled him and he frowned as she turned back into the bedroom.

“Rae?” Bellamy questioned, following her into his room, and then coming to a dead stop.

Spread across his comforter was his life.

Hundreds of state IDs, Drivers Licenses, Social Security Cards, photographs, land deeds, letters were finely combed through and displayed on the dark brown comforter than covered his bed. Panic spread through him, and he had to fight against his own body to look at Raven, who was hugging herself tightly, fighting back her own tears.

“I um, I was getting the extra wraps you said you had up in your closet to wrap my ankle because it…it was swelling and, a bunch of stuff fell out of some boxes.” She explained, much too calmly for his liking.

“Raven—”

“I want to…I don’t know if I want to know, but I knew it was—I knew you were too good to be true.”

His jaw set, “Rae, if you just give me a chance—”

“What is it, Bellamy? Who the hell are you? Is Bellamy even your real name?”

“It is. I promise you it is.”

“Who are you?” She yelled, tears finally breaking over the lids of her eyes and creating shiny trails down her cheeks as they caught the light in the room. “Why do you have sixty-seven ids from almost every state in the country? Why do you have fourteen different social security cards? Why do you own land in Canada, Montana, California and Pennsylvania? And why are they all from different years ranging from fucking 1908 to two years ago?!” She was screaming by the time she finished her sentence, and Bellamy’s body went into shock.

“Raven, I don’t know how to explain this and I’m afraid if I do, you won’t believe me.”

“How am I supposed to when everything else has been a lie?” Her voice broke on every word, and it was when she went to take a seat on the bed that he noticed her hands were shaking. “I told you I loved you and you didn’t say it back. Is this why?”

He let out a shaking sigh, kneeling in front of her and brushing tears away from her eyes. “Raven, I love you. I do.”

“Are you in love with me?”

“Yes, of course.”

“Are you just saying this to save us?”

“Do we need saving?” A quiet sob broke through his chest, and his eyes blurred with hot tears.  

She reached behind her, picking up one of the identification cards. “Bellamy Alexander Franklin, born in 1940, place of residence at 54 Maple Avenue, Atherton, California.” She listed off. “Bellamy Martin Graves, born in 1956, place of residence at 2360 Crowne Point Boulevard, Suamico, Wisconsin.” He tried to cut in, and she just spoke louder. Bellamy Robert Vincent. 3004 Brick Lane, Decatur, Georgia. Born in 1975.” She looked down at him. “Give me your wallet.”

“Raven,” He whispered.

“Give me your fucking wallet, Bellamy.” He slipped the billfold out of his back pocket and handed it to her, where she furiously ripped the plastic folder than contained his driver’s license. “Bellamy Weston Blake, born –” The tears started coming more, and she rubbed at her puffy, red eyes in frustration. “Bellamy Blake. Why? Why did you do this to me?”

“I didn’t do—this wasn’t intentional.”

“What is it, huh? Are you some kind of fugitive? Do you make fake I.D.s for fun? Why does this one say you were born in 1940? 1956? I’ve been wracking my mind trying to figure out for the life of me why you would have all these.” He stayed quiet. “You can’t even say anything to me?”

“It’s not my secret to tell, Raven.”

“If you love me you’d tell me the truth.” Her words hit him in the chest like a bullet, sending shrapnel-like ripples through his system. His gut rolled with nausea and his temples pounded in pain. So, he stayed quiet.

It seemed to be the wrong choice.

Raven turned and grabbed her coat off the bed, tugging it onto her arms. Her crutches swayed and when one fell over, Bellamy reached for it and attempted to steady her on her feet. “No—STOP! Get away from me,” She screamed and delivered a hard punch to his chest. “Don’t touch me. I don’t need your help.”

“R-Raven, please. Stay. Let’s just…We can talk. Just stay, please.” He was all but on his knees, begging. “I love you, I mean it. I never stopped.”

Her brow rose in confusion. “You never stopped?”

“You don’t remember, I’ve been trying to make you remember.”

“Remember what?” She croaked, voice hoarse from yelling.

“Me,” The word barely came out, his body felt so weak. “Remember…me.” Her lower lip quivered. “Raven, remember us. The tree out back, the cypress…fresh fish, the way you put way too much salt on everything. The wooden swing I made you, the…your birthmark.”

Raven shook her head, the look on her face growing stranger. “What are you talking about?”

“Baby, please. Just…I’ll tell you everything if you just stay, don’t leave me again.”

“How do I know you’re not gonna lie to me?”

“I can’t…you have to trust me.”

Her eyes fell to the barrage of paperwork on the bed, then she closed them tightly for a moment, as if to push out any remaining tears. “That’s the thing, Bellamy. I can’t trust you.”

As she pushed passed him, he got a whiff of some kind of scent. Maybe her soap, or shampoo. Sweet, like honey. It broke him.

His front door closed, and he came to the realization that the first time he lost her, she had died in his arms.