Dec 6, 2020
one day i’ll move out one day i’ll move out one day i’ll move out
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one day i’ll move out one day i’ll move out one day i’ll move out
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That one scene in Parks in Rec when the coffee pot’s broken but as my family... always blaming me
My mom: Who broke the coffee pot? I’m not mad, I just want to know.
Everyone:
My brother: I did it, I broke it.
Mom: No, no you didn’t. Mary?
My sister: Don’t look at me, look at Abby.
Me: What? I didn’t break it.
My sister: Huh, that’s weird. How’d you even know it was broken?
Me: [deadpan] Because it’s right in front of us, and it’s broken.
My OTHER sister: If it matters, probably not, Abby was the last one to use it.
Me: Liar! I don’t even drink that crap!
The first sister: Oh, really? What were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?
Me: I use the coffee cup for my aesthetic! Everyone knows that, MaRy!
Daniel: Okay, let’s not fight. I broke it. Let me pay for it, Sara.
Mom: No! Who broke it?
Dad: Abby has been awfully quiet…
Me: Really?1 Oh my god!
[everybody arguing]
My third and final sister, off to the side because she’s the youngest and can’t do anything wrong: [evil cackle] I broke it. It burned my hand so I punched it. I predict 10 minutes from now they’ll be at each other’s throats with warpaint on their faces and a pig head on a stick.
My brother gets fucking irrationally angry over literally everything and i get told I’m the one with the attitude
okay