#blaida

Y'all may remember Blaida from the last post. You might know how she defeated a goddess with a diagram that was just too gorgeous for this world. You might know that she is very good with throwing knives. But here's a story about Blaida that you don't know yet.

After the incident with the pesky goddess, people came to her for advice on how to escape pacts with their deity overlords. She refused to help them unless they were able to solve a very complicated math problem. Nobody managed to solve this math problem until a very handsome man approached her. He introduced himself as Fyne, which means death in the language of magic. No one bore that name lightly. Now, Blaida was very old at this point and had nothing to lose. She asked him to solve her math problem, and he solved it with very little trouble. So she invited him in for tea.

After some small talk, she asked him why he was there, really there. He said that he was there to take her with him to the afterlife. She was so stubborn, he said, that he had to come collect her in person. She told him "damn right, I am, come back when you have a better reason to take me."

Fyne had heard of her fearsome stubbornness, so he determined to be just as persistent. He knew that force was not the way to go - he had heard of her prowess with knives - so he determined to win her over with his charm. He sent her flowers, he called her on the phone. He respected her boundaries and never returned to the house, but made sure that she knew he cared. Over time, Blaida began to care for her gentleman caller, Death himself.

He found himself laying awake thinking about her one night and that's when he realized that he had feelings for her. Fyne never fell in love with anyone. He knew what would happen if he brought her to the afterlife - he would never see her again. That was the rule. Fyne was bound by eternal law to not fraternize with the spirits in the afterlife. After much debate, he called her in the morning and asked to come over. She said yes. Blaida usually took pleasure in solitude, but she'd been wanting to see Fyne for some time. Today was a special day. It was a leap year. Pit Stop's orbital period was imperfect - the world orbited its star at a rate of 300.3333333 (repeating, of course) and 1/400th days. In other words, there was a leap year every three years to compensate for the imperfect orbital period. This was one such year. Blaida had a surprise for Fyne if he came around on this day.

On Earth, women could propose to men on a leap day. In Pit Stop, though, women would give men melons and ask them to be their partners. Blaida wished to do this, but he had to pass a special test first - he had to present her with a math problem that she could not solve. If he managed to do this, then he would be welcome to come in and receive her surprise.

Fyne came around with a surprise of his own, a melon, which was both of their favorite fruit. The problem he posed to her was "Do you know why I haven't come around before?"

Blaida simply chuckled. "Because you care about me and it doesn't add up?"

Death himself blushed and said, "You know me too well. May I come inside?"

"Absolutely," Blaida said.

There was an awkward silence and then Blaida said "you know what day it is, don't you?"

Fyne said, "Leap Day?"

Blaida smiled. "Indeed. I have something for you."

She went into the kitchen and halved a tiny melon. Fyne was left waiting, so he tossed his melon around and ended up dropping it and shattering it all over the floor. Blaida said "don't worry, I have you covered" and handed him one half of her melon with a wink. They cleaned up Fyne's melon and then kissed. Fyne called his assistant in the afterlife and said "I quit. I've been given a melon."

The assistant took a quick note and said "Duly noted, sir. See you around."