I Forgot Him on Date 5
Your hair is gelled and combed
My head rests on your plain white T
I breathe in the synergy
Of expensive cologne
And strong arms wrapped around me
It's been two dates
And you've outdone him
In every possible way
From the warm compliments
To the way you watch me
Race around the kitchen
And you grab my waist
Pulling me in for a slow kiss
But do I have the heart to tell you
That none of these things could prepare you
Nevertheless myself
For the baggage my heart has been dealt?
It's been three dates
And the words pour out of my mouth
As if each thought in my head
That he always said he didn't get
Was meant for your ears.
I pause to soak in the silence
My foots not tapping
My fingers aren't drumming
For the first time, I've been relieved
I flashback to the nights
That mysteriously turned into daylight
As I struggled for even breathing
And to slow my heart beating
When his mysteries flooded my body
So often with anxiety
That I forgot what it was like
To feel safe.
It's now date four
Your lips are soft and smooth
They lightly press against my forehead
But I can still feel the scratch
From his rebelling mustache
The territorial bites on my neck
The taste of my blood lingering on my lip
Your hands appreciatively trace my body
But I can only feel his rough fingertips
Digging into the dimples of my hips
Throwing me to the bed.
We don't talk about our past
Because if I ask
You might ask
I don't want to feel him
Don't want to see him
And if I explain him
I'm sure you'd see the hallow shadows
in the depths of my eyes
Where the love used to reside
You'd see the missing part of me
That I let him take from me
You'd run for cover
There's no room for a new lover
But I'm praying one day
you'll erase his face
And I will finally
Let myself leave this place
Say goodbye to the ghosts
That I turned into homes
From the tornado of his grip
That just won't let go
But you turn screaming in the rain
To a subtle glimmer of hope
Your hair is gelled and combed.
-Star
