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MY NAME IS SLEIPNIR AND I’M HERE TO TELL YOU ABOUT BIOSHOCK AND DISNEY.

THESIS STATEMENT: ROBERT LUTECE AND ELEANOR LAMB ARE WORKING TO STOP THE EVIL MAD GOD MICKEY MOUSE FROM CONSUMING THE WORLD.

Now hang on that sounds wild but I’ll convince you

Let’s start with the obvious question: “But Sleipnir, what makes you think Robert Lutece and Eleanor Lamb have anything to do with Disney at all??”

Because THEY’RE BOTH IN DISNEY TV SHOWS, RIGHT NOW.

Let’s start with Eleanor. I have a little sister, okay, so I see these shows pretty often and imagine my shock when I looked up and saw a girl who looks just like Eleanor on the new Tangled show, right down to the pattern of her armor looking like a Big Sister suit:

She looks familiar doesn’t she??

A competent, driven young warrior with short black hair?? Clearly, Cassandra is just an alias for one Eleanor Lamb.

How would Eleanor get into the Tangled universe though?? There’s only two people who have the power to get her there and only one of them seems to have the emotional drive to put any effort into helping others.

It should come as no surprise then that on another Disney children’s show, there happens to be a man who owns two pugs -- a ginger with blue eyes, wears a vest suit, and also happens to be a scientist -- a man who goes by the alias “Bob” with no full  name given. What is Bob short for? ROBERT.

Robert “Bob” Lutece, gentlefolk.

But why would these two have implanted themselves into Disney? Simple. They’re trying to keep a malevolent mad god from taking over the multiverse.

Mickey Mouse.

There is no other explanation for the insane obsession the Mickey Mouse world has with him -- statues. Everything is named after him. There is no fewer than three different Mickeys living in this universe in different variations; the Original Mickey, a Vampire “Count Mickula,” and “Martian Mickey”, both of which meet Mickey Mouse and clearly are not just Mickey in disguise. Even entire planets are shaped like his head. No one questions these anomalies -- clearly, Mickey is a god, and a narcissistic one at that.

The only explanation is that Eleanor Lamb and Robert Lutece have teamed up to stop the mad god before he consumes the entire multiverse.

Special thanks to @jackrabbitwynand and @dadtron-3000 for making this possible