#binchan angst

“I-I didn't say it like that,” Changbin stammers and punches Felix's arm awkwardly. “Oh my God, this is so bad, I'm leaving,” he gets up, eyes widening as Chan's hand finds his and holds him back. 

“No, no, let's talk about this, yeah?” he asks soothingly, and Changbin sits down heavily. “Thanks, Lix, I'll take it from here.”

Felix smirks and gets up. “Have fun, you two,” he says cheerfully and hops out of the room, making Chan giggle. 

“Menace,” Changbin chuckles before glancing at Chan nervously. “I'm sorry for throwing it into your face like that.”

“It's fine,” he giggles and tilts his head at him curiously. “But you'd like to try that out? Being submissive?”

Changbin nods gently and can barely meet his eyes. “I just felt like…I don't know. Whenever I thought about it, I imagined I'd feel safest with you trying that out.”

“That's sweet,” Chan smiles softly. 

“You don't have to if you don't want to,” he quickly adds. “I wouldn't want you to be uncomfortable or anything just to help me out and-,” his eyes widen as Chan's hand cups his cheek. 

“Breathe,” he says soothingly, rubbing his thumb across his cheekbone. “I'd love to share those intimate moments with you, Binnie. I wouldn't see it as me helping you out or doing you a favor. I'd enjoy it, honestly, and I love that you're willing to trust me with this.”

Changbin exhales a breath he didn't know he was holding. “Oh, okay,” he smiles shyly. 

“But you've never been on the receiving end? Also, no fingers, no tongue, nothing?” he asks gently, and Changbin shakes his head. 

“Nothing…is that a problem?” he asks timidly. 

“Not at all,” Chan reassures him calmingly. “Means we can slowly work our way up, see what you like and what you don't like,” he tells him, and his friend nods, relieved. “You wanna cuddle and set up some boundaries and stuff?”

Not much later, Changbin’s head is comfortably lying on Chan's chest as the older plays with his hair. They've talked through their boundaries and settled on the color system and preferences. Chan does most of the work, asking his way forward and trying to ease Changbin, who's still awfully embarrassed about it all. It gets better here in Chan's arms, who doesn't seem to be bothered by one bit he reveals about himself. 

“Feeling better now?” Chan asks gently, scratching his scalp. 

“I still feel shy but not as nervous anymore,” he confesses, and Chan hums softly. “Can we…Can we just kiss for a bit tonight?” he asks timidly, and Chan giggles adoringly. 

“Of course, we can,” he says and gently pats his back, sitting up against the headboard of his bed. He locks eyes with him and pats his thighs. “Come here.”

He swallows softly and chews on his lower lip. “I'm too heavy,” he whispers timidly, and Chan's face falls at the pain in his eyes. 

“Binnie,” he says softly before lifting him into his lap effortlessly and smiling at him. “You're not, not to me.” He soothingly fondles up his thighs and searches his eyes. “You're okay?”

“Yeah,” he nods quickly and hesitantly wraps his arms around his neck. He shivers as Chan's hands find his hips and locks eyes with him. 

Chan flashes him a reassuring smile and squeezes his hips before leaning in a little. “Can I kiss you?” he asks politely. 

“Yes, please,” he breathes out so naturally it surprises him for a second. He doesn't have much time to think, though, because Chan's hand cradles his cheek, and their lips brush together. He melts into the kiss, body automatically searching Chan's, eyes fluttering close. 

Chan hums softly and weaves his fingers into Changbin’s hair, keeping him in place as they kiss. His unoccupied hand travels below his shirt and up his back, making the younger male melt into his touch with a soft sound. Chan is testing the waters as they kiss, hand roaming his strong back, and he slowly detaches himself from his lips. Leaving a trail of kisses down his jaw, he gently pulls him back by his hair before kissing his neck. 

Changbin breathes out shakily at the change, hand hesitantly burying itself in Chan's curls as he paints his neck with loving kisses and tiny nibbles at his skin. “Chan hyung,” he whispers after a while, squirming a little in his lap. Chan hums against his collarbone, leaving a trail of kisses there. As he doesn't answer, Chan pulls back, and Changbin blushes furiously. He wants, no, needs more, but he doesn't know how to ask. 

Luckily, Chan seems to understand and gently tugs at the hem of his sweater. “Can I take that off?” His friend nods timidly, and Chan kisses him soothingly as he eases the fabric up his chest before pulling back to take it off. “Mine as well?” he offers and lets Changbin take his sweater off for him. 

Chan lowers Changbin onto his mattress and straddles his lap, hovering above him. He continues his trail of kisses down his neck, gently sucking at the small bites to mark him up. Moving further down on top of him, he kisses down his chest, groaning softly as he can bury his teeth in his pecs. He laps at his nipples, sucking softly and grazing his teeth over his buds. Changbin beneath him moans sweetly, clearly trying to keep the noise down, and Chan lets him for now. 

Chan takes his time, painting a beautiful picture of love all over his torso. Small bites growing into pretty marks adorn his hips, featherlight kisses trail along the hem of his boxers, and Changbin can't stop squirming beneath him. After checking in and getting consent, Chan gently shoves down his sweatpants, continuing his trail down his thighs before going back up on his inner thighs. His fingers sink into his skin, spreading his legs when he tries to shy away the closer he gets to where he needs him most. Very obviously by now. 

Chan rests his head on his thigh once he's done after what felt like hours of soft pleasure for Changbin. He glances up at him through his lashes, and Changbin gulps softly at how blown his pupils look. “We don't have to, but would you like to try how my tongue feels for now?”

“You mean…,” he trails off as Chan nods and a low moan escapes his lips. “Please, Chan hyung,” he nods quickly. 

They change their spots in bed once more, letting Changbin get comfortable against Chan's pillows. Chan smiles down at him and brushes back his hair for him, which is already sticking to his forehead a little. His eyes are wide and hungry, his lips swollen, and his cheeks flushed. “I know I said it before, but you're so beautiful,” he tells him softly, only deepening the blush on his cheeks. 

“Stop it,” he mumbles weakly, and everything about his body language tells Chan differently. 

Chan gently shoves a pillow beneath his hips and locks eyes with him again. “You're ready?” he checks in, and Changbin nods, blushing softly as Chan eases down his boxers, already stained a little from Chan’s body brushing against his lap whenever he has moved on top of him. “Say yellow if you need a break, red if you want to stop, okay?” he reminds him, and the younger male nods, biting his lower lip hard as Chan gets comfortable between his legs. “Words, beautiful.”

His lips part softly, body shivering at the small compliment and Chan makes a mental note of it for another time. “Yes, Chan hyung,” he nods, and Chan hums, clearly pleased. For a second, his nervosity takes the upper hand, and he’s about to stop Chan as he spreads his cheeks, but all protest dies in his throat when Chan’s tongue licks up slowly between them. His lips part with a soft gasp as Chan’s tongue circles his tensing hole, hands gripping the sheets tightly at the unfamiliar feeling. “Oh, fuck,” he whispers, and Chan chuckles softly, making Changbin gasp at the vibrations shooting through his body from it. 

Chan gently presses his tongue inside after a while, and Changbin falls apart above him with a soft whimper. He gently guides his legs onto his shoulders and soothingly rubs his thighs as he pushes in deeper. A strangled groan leaves his lips as he tries to keep quiet, unsure if Chan would mind him being loud or maybe even whiny if he kept going like that. He throws his arm over his face, trying to hide as Chan makes him fall apart with his damn tongue only. Chan glances up at him, pulling back and smirking at the whine that leaves his lips. “Binnie,” he says softly, giggling as he glances at him shyly. “Make as much noise as you want to,” he assures him, and Changbin can tell he means it. “Also, you can touch, baby,” he tells him and gently guides his hand down to his hair.

“O-Okay,” he stumbles over his words, not trying to be desperate and beg him to continue. 

Chan giggles adoringly and squeezes his thighs. “You’re so cute.”

“I’m not cute-” he protests and breaks off with a sweet moan as Chan eases his tongue back inside. “Nevermind,” he huffs, grip tightening on Chan’s hair to steady himself. He pulls at the sheets with a desperate little sound, and Chan reaches up, gently easing the fabric from his hand and replacing it with his own. He intertwines their fingers and lovingly squeezes his hand. 

Chan pulls back after another while when Changbin’s moans turn needy and at the edge of frustration. “Need more?” he asks, and Changbin nods weakly. “Would you be okay with me using my fingers?”

“Yes, hyung,” he nods, heart warming at how caring Chan is with him, always making sure he's okay. 

“Okay, try to relax, yeah?” he tells him and fumbles for the bottle of lube stored away in his bedside table. He spreads some on his fingers and watches Changbin observantly as he pushes the first one inside. “Breathe,” he tells him softly, and Changbin’s head falls back with a soft noise. Chan gently pulls his finger out a little before pushing back in. “Feels okay?”

“s’good,” he groans and soon asks for more. A loud moan leaves his lips as Chan scissors two fingers inside of him, stretching him out deliciously. He covers his mouth in shock, and Chan giggles softly, leaning down. 

He gently takes his hand away and replaces it with his lips, kissing him and stifling his next moan. 

Changbin shudders beneath him and kisses back fiercely. He's so close, and he can't even blame himself because Chan's kissing session before had worked him up so much already. “Hyung,” he moans out weakly, subconsciously fucking back against his fingers. “I'm so close.”

Chan hums and curls his fingers, dragging them over his prostate. Changbin’s body tenses, eyes rolling back and mouth dropping with the prettiest moan so far. 

His world explodes before his eyes with white, hot flashes as he paints their chests with thick ropes of cum. Chan's name tumbles from his lips, and he can't stop shaking at the intensity of his orgasm. He doesn't fully register Chan leaving as his brain tries to accept the fact that he just came untouched. 

Chan gently cleans him up and reaches up to brush his hair from his face once he's done. “You're okay?”

“More than okay,” he smiles shyly and leans into his touch.

“Let's take a nice shower, and then we can cuddle if you want,” he offers, and Changbin nods gently. 

Once they're in the shower and Changbin gets a full view of his hyung, his brain stops working for a moment. He's on his knees before he can fully process it and stares up at him with wide eyes. “Can I make you feel good in return?” he asks, blushing a little at Chan's intense gaze. Chan gives in, suspecting Changbin feels like he has to repay him. 

The moment Changbin welcomes him in the wet warmth of his mouth Chan's head drops back against the tiles of his shower with a loud groan. He definitely knows what he’s doing.

Two weeks later 

Changbin glances at Chan in the recording booth and shifts a little in his chair. Since their night together, none of them had made a move. Chan wanted to give Changbin the time he needed, and Changbin chickened out at least three times this week at the thought of asking for more. It's getting harder to stop himself today since it's just them. Watching Chan work has always been something he enjoyed. 

“How was that, Binnie?” Chan's voice pulls him from his thoughts. 

“Uh, let's listen back to it,” he says and tries to listen, but Chan groans as he hears the recording, bringing up memories of their shared shower. 

“No, delete that one,” Chan shakes his head before lifting his shirt to wipe his face, getting hot in the booth. 

Changbin can't help but stare at his bare stomach, the waistband of his boxers clearly on display. Shit. “Chan hyung?” he asks quietly. 

“Yeah?” Chan asks, grabbing the sheets with his text and mindlessly switching them. 

“How long did Jisung say he'd be gone?” he asks, and Chan frowns. 

“I don't know, I think another hour or two,” he shrugs. “Why?”

“Because I…I need you,” he admits, and the sheets slip from Chan's fingers. 

He quickly bends down to gather them and hits his head at the microphone coming back up. “Yeah, okay, shit,” he curses softly and steps out of the booth. “Here? Now?” he asks, and Changbin blushes heavily. 

“I didn't exactly think this through,” he confesses, and the grin that covers Chan's lips at that makes him squeeze his thighs together tightly. 

“Mhm, I think to go all the way for the first time, we should stick to home,” he says, and Changbin nods agreeingly. “But I do have something in my mind since last time.”

“Yeah?” he asks softly, heart warming at the fact that Chan's been thinking about him as well. 

“Mhm,” Chan hums softly. “I really want to eat you out while you sit on my face,” he says, ears burning up a little. At first, Changbin seems intrigued, but suddenly, a shadow travels over his face, and he timidly lowers his gaze. “Or not?” he asks gently. 

Changbin fidgets with his hands and shakes his head. “I can't.”

“We don't have to if you don't want to; that's okay,” Chan promises, worried that he overstepped a boundary now. 

“No, I-I want to, I just-” he swallows hard, feeling tears burning in his eyes as memories crash down on him in waves and threaten to drown him. “I'm too heavy,” he whispers. 

Chan kneels down on the floor in front of his chair and gently unclasps his hands, taking them. That's the second time he mentioned this. “Binnie,” he says softly. “Where's that coming from, hm? Who told you such bullshit?” Changbin exhales shakily and glances at Chan, whose face softens, spotting the tears in his eyes. “Heyy, you can tell me, baby.”

Chan listens patiently as Changbin tells him about some guy he's been seeing before they started messing around among the group. He explains how they'd get intimate, but whenever they wanted to switch things up, he backed out last minute, blaming his weight. “I'm fine. I forgot about it, but…it's coming back a little now that I could have it,” he admits, and Chan cups his face, wiping away a tear for him. 

“My beautiful Binnie,” he says so softly it tugs at Changbin’s heartstrings. “You're perfect, and that guy is some massive asshole,” he tells him, making him chuckle. “Please, I'm literally on my knees, please sit on my face and let me give you what you wanted.”

Changbin gently shoves his chest. “You're not the one supposed to be begging here.”

Chan giggles. “I will, just this once,” he winks at him and gets up, kissing his forehead sweetly. “If you still want it, I will make it happen. If not, it's okay.”

Changbin searches his eyes timidly and finds nothing but genuine interest and love in them. He swallows down his anxiety and nods weakly. “Please, Chan hyung,” he breathes out. 

Chan cups his face and gives him a gentle but long kiss. “Do you trust me?” he asks calmly. 

“Yes,” he nods, sinking deep into Chan's soft chocolate orbs. “I do.”

“Good,” he nods and soothingly rubs his thumbs across his cheekbones. “So if I tell you to move or sit down, you'll be a good boy and do as I say.”

Changbin swallows down his worries and feels a sense of trust and calmness taking over as he looks into his hyung’s eyes. Chan can see the change in his eyes, heart skipping a beat at how soft and vulnerable his friend looks. “I'll be a good boy.”

“That's right, my pretty boy,” Chan smiles satisfied. 

“Yours?” he asks, growing shy at Chan's stunned look. 

“Mine,” he nods sweetly and gives him another quick kiss, making the younger melt into it. “Now come on, before Ji gets back,” he whispers and winks at him mischievously. Chan grabs everything they need and quickly locks the door, getting comfortable on the sofa. He guides Changbin into his lap and pulls him into a kiss, trying to ease his nerves. 

Changbin anxiously positions himself above Chan’s face, taking a deep breath as Chan’s hands find his thighs. At first, he shies away from his touch, suddenly insecure again, but Chan doesn’t let him. His tongue continues its delicious play from two weeks ago, and Changbin can’t think much anymore. He still tries to take some weight off, but he doesn't succeed for long because Chan notices and pulls him down, gaining a groan from both of them. The longer Chan goes on, the weaker he grows, and he ends up bent over, arms resting on the sofa, his face buried in them with weak sounds. 

Chan moans deliciously beneath him, shuddering at the soft whines leaving Changbin’s lips. His hands knead his ass and thighs, eyes rolling back as Changbin starts fucking back onto his tongue. 

He growls in protest as Changbin suddenly grows lighter on him again, taking some weight off him again. Changbin bites his lip, already missing how deep Chan got only seconds ago. But the strangled sounds coming from him worry him, and he feels like he can't do this to him any longer. He has to help a little. 

Chan pats his thigh twice, signaling him to sit up. He blinks at him once he does and frowns. “What did I tell you?”

“To be a good boy,” he answers shyly. 

“You enjoyed it, didn't you?” he asks gently, and Changbin nods, a heavy blush creeping up his neck and settling on his cheeks. “Why did you stop then?”

“Are you enjoying it?” he asks quietly. 

“I fucking love it,” Chan says bluntly and squints at him. “Now sit down properly, baby; I won't ask again.”

“Y-yes, hyung,” he nods quickly and gets back into position. 

The next time he tries to take some weight off, Chan's grip is firm, keeping him in place. Changbin whimpers in protest as his hips start stuttering, pace growing a little rough as he chases his high. But Chan doesn't budge, moaning filthily against him and guiding him through. Changbin’s stomach flips hard, and tears shoot to his eyes. Chan was not only able to carry his weight on top of him, he even enjoyed it.

Five days later

Changbin smirks to himself as Chan drives them back home. Today, everyone would be out for a movie and dinner after, which seemed like the perfect opportunity for them to take the next step without having to keep quiet or anything. Changbin had made up an excuse of feeling overwhelmed, and Chan had assured their friends he'd stay with him. So once they knew everyone would be gone, they stopped working and started their way home. Chan had been touchy all day, driving him mad, seemingly excited as well. 

Once they're inside, Changbin strolls over to their kitchen island, inspecting the various cookies their friends made. He reaches forward to grab the note Minho wrote them and yelps, surprised when Chan suddenly wraps his arms around his waist, pressing his already hardening dick against his bum. “Chan hyung?” he asks, and Chan groans softly in response, burying his face in his back. 

“I swear I could take you right here if I wouldn't know better,” he confesses, making Changbin’s mouth water. “You're so cute, you don't even know; it's driving me insane,” he tells him and runs his hands up his torso. “Couldn't stop thinking about it all day.”

Changbin blushes at his words and bites his lower lip, pressing back against him. His lips part in surprise at Chan's growl, and he feels like he's about to pass out when Chan starts grinding against his ass. “Really, Chan hyung?” he asks innocently, pressing back against him more. “You think I'm cute?”

Chan moans needily as he grinds against him. “So cute,” he tells him. “Made me so hard I had to take a long shower after dance practice.”

Changbin moans in response. “That's why you were gone so long?” he asks, and Chan starts fumbling with the waistband of his trousers. 

“Sofa, now. I need some release right now,” Chan announces so casually it makes him dizzy. “Right now, I'm thinking with my dick; that's not good when I should take my time with you,” he admits honestly. 

“Fuck, do whatever you want to me, hyung,” Changbin moans needily. “Use me, please.” He finds himself on the sofa within no time, with Chan straddling his lap. 

Chan drags his hips across his lap and moans loudly at the needed friction. He braces himself on his chest, and Changbin’s hands find his thighs, fingers digging into his skin as Chan humps his lap forcefully. “You can move,” Chan pants, head falling back as he does. “Yeah, just like that, Binnie,” he praises him, and their moans mix beautifully. “Doing so good for your hyung,” he tells him, head dropping forward with a broken moan as Changbin rolls his hips up against him. 

“Feels so good, hyung,” he moans out. 

It doesn't take long, and Chan above him tenses up with a soft, relieved cry, shuddering as he cums in his pants. His eyebrows furrow with bliss, lips parting with silent moans, hips stuttering their way through his high. Changbin can't get enough of the sight of his hyung stumbling over the edge; he's a different type of pretty then. Also, it makes him all fuzzy, knowing he's the reason. Chan drops down onto the sofa next to him with a soft grunt and rubs his face, trying to catch his breath. “Okay,” he says after a moment. “That's better.”

“Your brain restarted?” Changbin teases softly, making him giggle. 

“Mhm, until you're undressed and moaning that beautifully,” he tells him, and Changbin blushes furiously. Chan gets up and helps him off the sofa before lifting him up. 

Changbin wraps his legs around his waist quickly and holds onto him with wide eyes. “Channie, hyung, let me down. I'm-” his words die in his throat at Chan's firm look. 

“Do I look like this is exhausting me?” he asks patiently, stopping in his tracks. 

“No,” he whispers. 

“I wouldn't pick you up if I thought I couldn't handle that, Binnie,” he tells him, and Changbin’s eyes brim with tears. “Okay,” he whispers and walks back to the sofa, sitting down with him in his lap. “Come here,” he says softly and pulls him into a strong hug. 

“I'm sorry,” he sniffles timidly, and Chan runs his hand through his hair. 

He soothingly kisses his head and rubs his back. “You're okay,” he tells him. “Don't listen to that voice in your head, yeah?” he asks and earns a nod and silent hum. “Do you still have his number? I'd love to invite him and show him how it's done,” he says, smirking when Changbin starts laughing. 

“You're so stupid.”

“I know,” he giggles, and they stay there until he's alright. 

Chan then carries him upstairs, kissing his worries away, and kicks his door closed before lowering him onto his bed. 

-

“You think Binnie will be okay?” Jisung asks thoughtfully. “I haven't noticed anything off all day,” he admits. 

“Not really,” Seungmin shrugs, thinking back to the time they all spent together. 

“Oh, I think he's just fine,” Felix assures them, and Jeongin squints at him. 

“You're sure?” he asks suspiciously. 

“Why?” Hyunjin asks. 

“Why what?” Felix tries to stall time to come up with an answer. 

“Why are you sure he's okay when he said he wasn't?” Jeongin clarifies. 

“Because Chan hyung is fucking him stupid right now,” Minho says casually, sipping on his drink. 

“Excuse me, what?” Hyunjin asks with wide eyes. 

“Minho hyung, you can't just say shit like that,” Jisung rolls his eyes at him. 

“You're all so blind if you didn't see that,” Minho rolls his eyes right back at them. “They've been growing closer for weeks now, and we all know Changbin was interested in submitting to Chan.”

Seungmin blinks at him as Minho keeps sipping on his drink. “On a scale from one to ten, how bored are you?” 

“A solid eleven on some days, why?” he asks, tilting his head and pulling a face at him. 

“How do you even notice that stuff?” Hyunjin asks flabbergasted. 

“How do you not?” Felix asks tiredly, and Minho hums agreeingly. 

“You guys are ridiculous,” he giggles happily. 

-

“Okay, try to relax for me, yeah?” Chan asks gently, aligning himself with his hole. “I'll go slow and gentle; you tell me if it hurts.”

“Yes,” Changbin nods, growing impatient. Chan had eaten him out patiently and then fingered him open for what felt like hours. His dick is leaking onto his stomach, his hole clenching around nothing, and his body screaming for a release. He just wants to finally feel him inside, finally experience what Minho has described as “incredible sex” talking about Chan. 

Chan starts pushing inside, groaning at how tight he still is, and closely watches his face. Once he's past the tip, Changbin tenses up beneath him, and Chan stops moving immediately. “Everything alright?”

“Yeah, keep moving,” he nods quickly, heart sinking a little. Did Minho have a thing for pain? This doesn't feel exactly comfortable. 

Chan eyes him suspiciously and pushes in a little more, watching Changbin’s eyes clouding with a pained expression. “I'm hurting you, right?”

“No, it's fine,” he shakes his head, sounding a little strained. “Just keep going, please.”

Chan shakes his head and pulls out again, grabbing the bottle of lube. “Binnie, we have all the time you need. I won't rush and hurt you in the process,” he tells him firmly and gently pushes in two fingers again. 

Changbin whines softly and pushes back against them. “Please,” he whimpers, and Chan gently caresses his cheek with his other hand. 

Chan stretches him out on his fingers, adding another two in the process, and kisses him, swallowing up his frustrated little sounds. Finally, he gets back into his prior position, trying again. This time, it goes easier, and Changbin beneath him gasps as he slowly pushes inside. “Better?” he grunts softly, reminding himself to go slow.

“Yes,” he nods eagerly, and this time he believes him. His jaw drops once Chan is buried inside him, and he can't help but squirm a little, feeling so full. 

“Take your time,” Chan tells him, holding himself back. He gently rubs his thigh, watching him closely as he gets adjusted to the feeling. 

“O-Okay,” he breathes out after a moment. “I think I'm ready.”

Chan nods and carefully pulls back before pushing back inside. Changbin sighs softly at the feeling of him massaging his walls as he works out a gentle rhythm. Chan lowers himself onto his arms, bracing himself next to his head, and smiles at him. He plants a few kisses down his jaw, and Changbin’s hand finds his back resting between his shoulder blades. “Don't be shy; let me hear you,” he tells him as he notices him trying to keep the noise down. 

“I'm too loud,” he protests softly, biting back another moan as Chan picks up the pace a little. 

“It's just us,” Chan reminds him and moans softly as Changbin clenches around him. “Wanna hear if I fuck you good, Binnie.”

“Fucks sake,” he groans at his bluntness, locking eyes with him. He swallows at how blown Chan’s pupils are, sheer need and passion clouding those usually so soft orbs. The next thrust pulls a beautiful, loud whine from him, and Chan buries his face in his shoulder with a soft groan at the sound. 

“That’s more like it,” he moans, kissing his neck and thrusting deep. “Fuck, you’re still so tight,” he grunts, and Changbin squirms a little. “Such a good boy, taking me so well.”

“Chan hyung,” he moans softly, his whole body responding to his praise. “You feel so good,” he tells him breathlessly.

Chan’s hips slam forward into him as he clenches around him, shifting positions a little. Changbin’s head falls back with an obscenely loud moan, and Chan stops moving, eyes widening. “Shit, sorry,” he apologizes immediately, swallowing as Changbin blinks up at him with glistening eyes.

“Please, do that again,” he whispers needily.

“You want me to be rough?” he asks quietly, and Changbin nods, biting his lower lip hard at the hunger clouding Chan’s eyes.

He arches into him and looks up at him through his lashes. “Please, hyung.”

Chan pulls out and grabs him by the waist, flipping him onto his stomach effortlessly. Changbin moans out, stunned, getting incredibly turned on by Chan handling him with such ease. Chan pulls him onto his knees and pushes back inside, grip firm on his hips as he sets a rougher pace. Changbin arches his back, melting into the pillow and gripping the sheets with a loud whine. Chan makes sure he’s comfortable with this and keeps a close eye on him before covering his hands with his own, intertwining their fingers. He plants soft kisses on his back, leaning down to his ear. “Such a good boy, Binnie. Doing so well, baby,” he praises him with little grunts as he pounds into him. 

Changbin can’t do much but whine his name, shivering as he hits his prostate. “Chan~.” He collapses into the mattress with Chan lowering himself on top of him, covering him with his body as their skin meets with forceful slaps. “Right, there, please,” he cries out as Chan repeatedly hits his sweet spot, moaning sinfully above him. The bedframe hits the wall in sync with Chan’s forceful thrusts, growing sloppier the closer he gets. “Chan,” he moans repeatedly, arching back into him. “So close.”

“Wanna cum?” he presses out, not that far away from his sweet release himself.

“Please, hyungie,” he whines.

“Make a mess, pretty boy,” Chan tells him and buries his face in his back. “Cum for me, yeah? Be a good boy, baby.”

Changbin doesn’t need another invitation and covers the sheets beneath him as he cums with a loud cry, whimpering as Chan fucks him through it, chasing his own release. 

“Inside?” Chan asks, hips stuttering.

“Yes,” he groans, getting a little overstimulated by now. His jaw grows slack at the sensation of Chan reaching his high, painting his walls with thick ropes of cum before collapsing on top of him. For a minute, they stay silent, both calming down a little before Chan moves on top of him, kissing his shoulder gently.

“And that wasn’t too rough?” he checks in and Changbin weakly shakes his head.

“That was amazing, you’re amazing,” he tells him, making him giggle. “Don’t laugh, I mean it,” he pouts, blushing a little as Chan kisses his cheek.

“You’re so cute,” he grins, and Changbin huffs.

“Will you stop calling me cute?” he laughs, and Chan squeezes him gently.

“Never,” he smirks before pushing himself up with a soft grunt. “Alright, let’s get cleaned up before the others return back home.”

Changbin smiles to himself and hums agreeingly. Minho had been right; Chan is incredible.

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Changbin frowned, stepping further into the cluttered room, his gaze lingering on the multiple coffee cups and the disarray. "When did you last sleep? Or eat something real?"

Chan shrugged, the despair he'd been fighting to keep at bay now creeping into his voice. "I don't know. It doesn't matter. I need to finish this track, but it's not... it's just not right. Nothing I do is good enough."

The room seemed to shrink with his confession, a tangible weight settling between them. Chan turned away, embarrassed by his own vulnerability. He couldn't afford to break—not now.

But then, a gentle hand landed on his shoulder, squeezing reassuringly. "Hyung, you're doing more than enough. You always do. Let's pack up for tonight, okay? You need rest."

Chan shook his head, tears pricking at his eyes as he faced the console again. "I can't, Bin. I can't stop until it's perfect. I'm letting everyone down. I'm supposed to lead, to make things work, and I'm failing everyone."

Hearing the break in Chan's voice, Changbin moved closer, his own heart aching. He turned Chan to face him, his hands gripping his shoulders firmly. "You're not failing anyone. You're our leader, but you're also human, Chan. We don’t expect you to carry all this alone. We never have."

Chan's defenses crumbled, and tears streamed freely down his face. "I don’t know how to stop, Bin. I don’t know how to just... be okay with it not being perfect."

Changbin pulled him into a tight embrace, his voice soft and steady in Chan's ear. "It's okay to not be perfect. It's okay to ask for help. Let's go home, Channie. Let me help you through this."

Chan clung to him, his body racked with sobs. After a moment, he whispered, timid yet desperate, "Will you... stay with me tonight? Just... I think I need to be held for a while."

Changbin tightened his hold, his heart swelling with protectiveness and love for his friend and leader. "Of course, Channie hyung. I’ve got you, always."

They left the studio together, the early morning air cool and refreshing after the stuffiness of the room. Changbin drove them back to their dorm, a silent promise hanging between them, filling the car with a comforting warmth.

Once inside, Changbin made sure Chan ate something and got ready for bed. The normalcy of the routine seemed to calm Chan, his earlier panic receding with each passing moment.

As they settled into bed, Chan curled into Changbin's side, his head resting against his chest. Changbin wrapped his arms around him, a protective cocoon against the world outside. They lay in silence, the steady rhythm of Changbin's heartbeat a lullaby that slowly lulled Chan into a much-needed sleep.

Changbin stayed awake a little longer, watching over Chan, his thoughts gentle and forgiving. In the quiet, he made a silent vow to ensure Chan never felt so overwhelmed again, to remind him that he was not alone in his responsibilities. They were a team, a family, bound by more than just music.

As dawn crept through the curtains, its light gentle and unassuming, Chan stirred, his eyes fluttering open to find Changbin's steady gaze. A small, genuine smile crossed his lips, a stark contrast to the tears of only hours before.

"Thank you, Bin," he murmured, his voice thick with sleep and gratitude.

Changbin smiled back, squeezing Chan slightly. "Anytime, hyung. We’re in this together, remember? Now get back to sleep, it's way too early."

And in the soft glow of the new day, Chan felt something shift inside him—a relief, a release. Maybe, just maybe, he thought, it was okay to lean on others, to not be perfect. And with Changbin by his side, he felt ready to face whatever came next.

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