#beachbday

Perfect birthdays and perfect people don't exist. I try to make sure everyone knows who I am - only to forget everything about them, how rude can i get?

i haven't written in a while

maybe i’ve had the urge

like a lingering itch after a sunburn

or maybe i just haven't had the right words.

But there's something rising up

like a new building on an empty lot

i want to let it out w/out losing hope

'cause weeds & flowers grow together.

My soul is always composing

hidden thoughts and deep emotions

all behind a locked door but i can't find the key

dread & cold are waiting for me.

I don't desire for everyone to just watch me fail. But I also don't want them to paint a perfect picture of me. I’m not an ad on the internet selling schemes. I'm also not going to let you settle for counterfeit happiness. I want you to know true joy & peace only found in the King.

When God created me he had already planned on saving me. He knew I'd face various trials and know intense pain & darkness. Even as a child of God I'm not immune to sin or its side effects. However, I'm not hopeless. I know everything works together for my good. I know He's making me more like Him. God's not human. God’s love for us means we’ll know hardship & discipline. I suffer w/ purpose and have hope in an eternity greater than this temporary home. I'll never face another dark day alone because I'll never be hidden from the Light.

I don't love perfectly, but I've been perfectly loved.

Romans 8:26-30

Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. And he who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. For those whom he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, in order that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. And those whom he predestined he also called, and those whom he called he also justified, and those whom he justified he also glorified.