#bbruins

Still, each time that your phone received a notification that Jake had come online you immediately stopped whatever you were doing to watch. You weren’t part of the group that regularly played with him and Pasta, nor did you even really participate in the chats, you just watched. And for a couple hours each time, you felt a little less alone. For weeks this continued, with you only popping in to chat to wish Jake’s sister a happy birthday when he let her take over his stream for a little bit. To be honest you were just grateful for something to do. Never did you expect to log on one day to find a whisper sitting in your inbox. 

Jdebrusk: Hey. Saw you’ve watched quite a few of my streams. Just wanted to reach out and say thanks. 

You weren’t shocked by the fact that he could see a list of viewers, you kind of expected that. What shocked you was the fact that he actually cared enough to reach out to some stranger who he had never actually interacted with before. You weren’t sure what had pushed you to respond, maybe it was the Southern friendliness or maybe it was something else but after typing and deleting a response multiple times you finally pressed send and then immediately closed your browser in a failed attempt to not freak out. 

Yourusername: Pretty sure I should be thanking you for sharing your time with us and making things a little easier. 

____

With no one you followed coming online to stream for a few days, you didn’t even check the site to see if Jake had responded. But when you next logged on and saw a message notification once again you found yourself getting nervous for no reason as you opened it. 

Jdebrusk: Well you’re welcome. Feel free to join in the chat anytime. Streaming has helped keep my family from driving me insane.  

Yourusername: I’m more of a lurker. It’s just easier. And family can be a lot but be grateful you aren’t just staring at 4 walls every day. 

Stepping away from your computer you grabbed your camera and attempted to go for a walk to take some aesthetic shots. As you slipped your memory card into the computer a while later, you noticed another notification. 

Jdebrusk:  Fair enough. You quarantining alone? 

Yourusername: yep. But I guess it could be worse. I could live where it’s snowing in May. 

Jdebrusk: Can I ask where you’re at?

For a split second you debated giving up this information but it didn’t seem like giving away your state could hurt. 

Yourusername: North Carolina. 

Jdebrusk: Nice! Cool state. Been there a few times. 

Yourusername: I’m aware. No need to rub in sweeping my team, Debrusk. 

Jdebrusk: And she’s got a sense of humor ladies and gentlemen. Well, or he...I guess I don’t even know that. AWKWARD. 

Yourusername: She works. 

Jdebrusk: Cool cool. So a hurricanes fan huh? 

Yourusername: Yeah. My family would probably disown me if they knew I was talking to a Bruin. 

Jdebrusk: Yowza. 

Yourusername: So if anyone asks I’m only here for Rocky appearances. ;)

Jdebrusk: She’s only here for my cat. Got it. 

You couldn’t explain why talking with Jake felt so easy but it did. When he came on to stream next you chirped him through whispers the entire time and seeing his reaction in real-time as he read them had you giggling uncontrollably. By the time he got off, you were just waiting for his comments to come streaming your way. Instead of some long-winded rant brushing off all your jabs you just got a single comment in response. 

Jdebrusk: It’s not fair that you can chirp me and I don’t know anything about you. 

Yourusername: What do you want to know? 

Jdebrusk: I mean your name would be a good start. Age might also be important...you’re not like 12 right? 

Yourusername: Would I be quarantining alone if I was 12? I’m 24. Y/N. 

Jdebrusk: right. Right. Y/N from Carolina. Who likes cats. Got it. Are you a student or…?

Yourusername: Freelance Photographer. 

Jdebrusk:  Alright. Nice. Do you do like weddings or nature stuff or what?

Yourusername: A little bit of everything. @wildflowerphotography is my company name if you want to go on insta and see some of my work. 

No reply followed and you tried not to dwell on it. Instead you poured a glass of wine, lit a few candles, and settled into your bathtub, trying to relax for bed. Still nagging thoughts lingered in your brain. Was sharing your company page too much? He probably wasn’t asking for you to promote yourself, he was just being polite right? Though you hated yourself for letting it bother you, you were the type of person who overthought everything...which thinking about it was probably why you were still single. 

Your anxious thoughts lingered and you tossed and turned all night before finally pulling yourself out of bed the next morning. It was only as you dug through your company dms, responding to a few potential clients that wanted you to take socially distant photos for them that you stumbled upon a familiar username. 

Jdebrusk: You took all of those? Holy shit that’s talent. 

The timestamp showed the message was sent only twenty minutes after you gave him the username and you sighed to yourself before chuckling at the fact that Jake was too lazy to switch back to twitch to respond. 

Wildflowerphotography: Thanks. I’m really proud of them all. 

It was still early in the morning so there was no way he was awake with the two hour time difference so after making yourself some breakfast you took another short walk, trying anything to get your mind off of the loneliness that felt worse today than most days. Your mood had definitely been a rollercoaster recently with higher peaks and lower lows than normal. It was something you were trying to manage the best you could but sometimes it was just hard. 

With the rest of your afternoon spent binging a random tv show you didn’t even look at your phone until dinner time, but waiting for you was another dm from the Canadian hockey player. 

Jdebrusk: You should be. 

Jdebrusk: So listen...this is probably weird but can I get your number so I can stop wading through a bunch of dms and whispers I don’t care about and just talk to you? 

It was a fair question but to be blunt, today was probably the worst day for him to ask because your anxiety-riddled brain kept wanting to know why he even cared about talking to you. You didn’t know what he was looking for from all of this but your mind immediately assumed the worst. So instead of just being open with him, you blew him off, completely ignoring his message. And when he logged onto twitch next, though you wanted to watch, you forced yourself to avoid that as well. 

Three days passed before another message appeared. 

Jdebrusk: You okay? You didn’t watch the last stream. I’m sorry if I fucked up. I’ll back off if you want...I just want to know that you’re okay. 

The concern he was expressing was honestly something you didn’t expect and you found yourself crying as you read it over and over. Jake was nothing but a joyous person and the last thing you wanted was to bring him down with the mess of your own mind. 

Wildflowerphotography: you didn’t fuck up. I just...this is all on me okay. 

With your phone left open to your message string with him you watched as little dots appeared before vanishing repeatedly. Eventually a new message appeared simply containing a string of numbers composing a phone number. Jake was putting the ball in your court and a few minutes later the part of you that was aching to hear his voice won the mental war and you found yourself dialing the number. 

“Y/N?” Jake questioned the second he answered and a shaky sob slipped from your throat at the sound of him speaking your name for the first time. “What’s going on?” He murmured and by his tone you could tell he was both confused and concerned. You wanted to speak, wanted to pretend everything was fine but you’d already gone over the edge and it was too late for that now. Another sob spilled through your body and you faintly heard Jake mumble a curse. “Do you want me to just talk to you? I’ll just keep talking okay and you can hang up if you want.” He offered. And talk he did, you weren’t even sure what he was telling you, you were more focused on the grounding sound of his voice itself rather than the content of the words he was speaking. Eventually your breathing steadied out and the elephant sitting on your chest lessened allowing you to murmur his name. 

The second he heard your voice he paused mid-story.

“Thank you.” You whispered into the phone. 

“Are you okay?” He inquired, his voice tentative like he was worried anything he said would push you back over the edge. 

“Better.” You admitted. “Not great but better.” 

“I’ll take better.” He insisted. “It’s nice to actually hear your voice.” He added, causing your cheeks to flame up unconsciously. You opened your mouth to apologize again for your breakdown only to be stopped as he insisted you not do so. “But really...are you okay?” He repeated his question and you sighed. 

“It’s been a rough few days mentally for me.” You admitted. “But I will be okay.” You added. 

“Okay enough to stop ignoring me?” He teased and when you let out another shaky breath he backtracked. “It’s okay, I get it. I was just worried. You don’t have to talk to me ever again if you don’t want to.” 

“I do want to.” You breathed. “Talk to you that is.” As if he sensed you had more to say, Jake remained quiet, only the sound of his breathing coming through the phone. 

“I guess...you should probably know that I tend to overthink things. I want to talk to you. Hearing your voice makes my entire day. I just...I guess I’m just confused on why you want to talk to me. What your intentions are, etc. And you...you don’t have to answer that just...that’s where my head is at.” 

Jake was silent for a minute before his voice reached back through the phone. 

“I’ll be honest, I don’t know what this is either. But I’m intrigued by you and I guess my intention is just to get to know you better if you’ll let me.” Jake’s honesty was refreshing and you nodded even though he couldn’t see you. “And if I can make your day just by talking...well that’s a pretty sweet bonus.” 

______

Quarantine continued to drag on, paused only by some carefully planned photo sessions with your distance lenses getting extra abuse. You continued talking to Jake, mostly through text but with the occasional phone call. He’d whine about the crap he was getting from his sister when he’d disappear to talk to you but he’d insist that it was worth it in the next breath. Between the streams, the phone calls, the texts and the memes he’d send you, suddenly you felt a lot less alone, at least emotionally. 

A month since your first phone call had passed before Jake sent you a text that made your heart stop. 

JD:  So how come I send you pictures all the time and yet I still don’t know what you look like? 

For weeks he had been sending you photos of him snuggling with Rocky or hanging with Jordyn and there had even been a shirtless workout pic or two which had left you debating whether a cold shower was appropriate. At the same time, you hadn’t worked up the courage to send him any photos in return other than ones you took of nature on your walks or snippets from photoshoots you’d done. Trying to downplay it all you sent back a teasing response. 

YN: What can I say I’m a behind the lens person. 

JD: Y/N...c’mon I just wanna see how beautiful you are. 

Leaving him on ‘read’ you sighed and bit your lip not sure how to respond. You were afraid if he knew what you looked like that he wouldn’t want to talk to you anymore and you weren’t sure what you’d do if you lost something that had sort of become a saving grace in this crazy time. 

JD: Is this one of those insecurity things? Is that why I haven’t seen you yet? 

It was starting to amaze you how well Jake could read you. It had been a long time since anyone was able to see through the walls you put up, see behind the camera that you hid behind, but it had only been a month or so and already Jake was starting to read the silences between the words. 

JD: Do you want me to get Jordyn to pump you up? A picture isn’t going to change what I think of you…

YN: You don’t know that. 

JD: C’mon YN give me a little more credit than that. You know I’m not that shallow. I like you okay. I like the woman that chirps me. I like the woman that listens to me and always knows what to say. I like the woman that sees me as Jake and not Boston Bruin Jake Debrusk. And since none of that is based on your physical appearance I’m going to like you no matter what you look like. 

YN: Promise? 

JD: Yeah Y/N, I promise. 

Scrolling through your camera roll you attempted to decide on which of the few photos of yourself made you look at least somewhat pretty before biting the bullet and attaching it to the text conversation. The moment you hit send you winced and your anxiety didn’t ebb until your phone rang in your hand. 

“You’re stunning.” Jake’s voice breathed lowly the second the line connected. “Just as beautiful outside as you are inside which I wasn’t sure was even possible.” By now you knew when Jake was trying to play something up versus when he was being genuine and his voice now was 100% the latter. But taking compliments about your body was never something you’d been good at so you didn’t know what to say in response. 

“I hope you believe me.” He added. “I knew you wouldn’t believe a text even if I sent it 100 times so I hope you can believe me, hearing me say it.” 

“I...thanks Jake.” You finally mumbled. You did believe that he was being honest, he had no reason not to be with you living thousands of miles apart, but at the same time, you still felt uneasy about it for reasons you’d never fully be able to explain. 

___

Tearing down the last barrier of anonymity seemed to open up a new world between you and Jake. If it was even possible you communicated more frequently, adding facetime calls to your usual methods. Seeing the way he looked at you while you talked sent heat flooding through your body and you quickly came to the realization that you were falling hard for him. 

That knowledge was terrifying and once again you wanted to pull away, protect yourself from getting hurt. But then Jordyn stole her brother’s phone and called you, raving about how when all of this was over you had to agree to meet her brother in person because she had never seen him like this over anyone. Talking with Jordyn reminded you that Jake didn’t have to go to all of this work, didn’t have to deal with your crazy emotions if he didn’t think you were worth the time and effort. It may be a pandemic but surely there were women in Edmonton willing to break social distancing rules if it meant scoring someone as wonderful as Jake. But yet each and every night he was on the phone with you, taking the time to get to know all of the things that make you tick, your likes and dislikes, your hopes and dreams. 

And it wasn’t just Jordyn that knew about you. You’d been on the phone with Jake when both of his parents came outside and when he’d asked them to come back in a minute because he was talking to you, they just called out your name in greeting and waved. 

“Your parents know my name?” You’d asked and Jake ducked his head shyly before replying. “I mean yeah…” He stated. “My mom can’t wait to meet you.” You were sure from Jake’s point of view that it was probably comical how wide your eyes went at his statement. 

“Jake what...what is this...are we just friends or…?” It wasn’t a question that you ever anticipated asking but it was out there now. From the other side of the screen, you watched Jake adjust his ball cap over his overly long hair. 

“Fuck...Y/N…” Jake started and you opened your mouth to assure him that friends was fine, that it was what you wanted too because if you didn’t put your heart out there than you couldn’t get hurt. Before you could speak though Jake continued. “No...we’re not just friends. I think you know that as well as I do.” He admitted. “I don’t know exactly what we are. I...I was hoping to meet you in person when I asked if you wanted to be my girlfriend. I know...I know that none of this is ideal because even when this is over there’s going to be the whole long-distance thing but...I can’t deny that I have feelings for you y/n. I don’t want to deny it.” 

“I don’t want to deny it either.” You said softly, fingers tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. “I mean...if you’re willing to put up with my emotional baggage…” You shrugged. 

“You have feelings for me too?” Jake questioned, his normal confidence suppressed. “I have no problems supporting you through dealing with your baggage if you’re willing to do the same with mine. I know I’ve fucked up in the past as a boyfriend and I don’t want to do that to you.” 

“I think I’m kinda sorta falling for you.” You stated anxiously, unable to meet Jake’s gaze through the screen until he breathed your name. 

“So can we agree we’re something more than friends and that we’ll figure out the details as part of returning to the new normal?” 

“Yeah...we can agree to that.” You nodded. 

_______

The new normal had finally arrived and that meant that you were going to see Jake in person for the first time. The two of you had been “more than friends” for what felt like forever now but had realistically been a few months but with each passing day you knew you wanted more. You still didn’t know how it would all work with him playing in Boston and you owning a company in North Carolina but you were ready to figure it out together if it meant that you could finally have him for real. 

Jake’s plane was scheduled to land in ten minutes and you were running so far behind. Your senior picture photoshoot had run over and traffic was a mess. You’d texted Jake apologizing but upon getting your text he’d quickly waved your concerns off declaring that he’d just get an uber and meet you at your apartment. It would be a better first meeting anyway because you wouldn’t be time-restricted by parking or pick up zone rules. 

When you finally pulled into your parking lot you checked your phone to see if Jake had arrived yet. It wasn’t until you reached the front steps of your building that you noticed someone sitting there, bags beside them. He looked up at the same time that your brain processed that it was him and he was really there and tears instantly prickled in your eyes. As you rushed to close the distance, Jake stood to catch you as you threw yourself at him. 

No words needed to be said as you tugged his mouth down to your own, kissing him for the very first time. It was nothing like you had expected but at the same time it was everything and at that moment you knew that this was it, you were in love. It had been such a long wait, but the feeling of his arms wrapped around you, his lips against yours was well worth it. It was cheesy but you knew that the physical chemistry was only this strong because you already knew each other inside and out and now that he was here, now that he was finally yours, things could only get better. 

His first few years in the NHL were spent long-distance but even that couldn’t shatter the strength of your love and respect for each other. Tucked against his side in a stolen moment in his truck while Christmas carols played over the radio he kissed your head. 

“You know I’m going to ask you to marry me someday.” He mused. “Because I want nothing more than to wake up with you in my bed every day for the next 105 years. You and the cat that I know you so desperately want to get when you move in.” He teased. 

Again, you had no doubt that he would make good on his promises. Right now he was focused on his career but your time would come and you were patient. 

There was the good and the bad that came with falling in love with an NHL player, but seeing Jake accomplish his dream of winning the Stanley Cup filled you with nothing but good emotions. Though the days following that were a bit foggy you remembered Jake promising once more that he was going to ask you to marry him...soon. 

Jake’s day with the cup had finally arrived and the two of you had planned to spend it back in Edmonton surrounded by your friends and family. Food had been ordered, as had the booze, and the yard of the house Jake had purchased for the two of you the summer before was filled with games and plenty of tables and chairs. 

You’d barely awoken for the day and already you were filled with more excitement than you could contain. You’d been debating on surprising Jake for weeks now, had talked about it with his sister Jordyn and if you were actually going to go through with it, today was the day. 

Jake was hanging with his dad and some buddies, laughing as he proudly showed off the Cup when you slipped out of the house with a small box in hand. Seeing the box, Jordyn immediately perked up and pulled her mom from a conversation, their eyes trained on you as you made your way across the yard. 

Your free hand was shaking as you rested it along Jake’s back and as he turned his head to look down at you, you were suddenly left without a voice for a moment. 

“What’s up, babe?” Jake inquired, his brow raising as he saw the box in your hand. 

“Can I steal you for a second, I have a present for you?” You responded, your heart pounding in your chest. Standing in front of the Stanley Cup, surrounded by all of your family and friends (more of which were turning to look at you every second), you took a deep breath. 

“We’ve been together for what feels like forever...except forever will never be long enough with you.” You spoke, your voice measured but loud enough that you knew people could hear you. 

“And for just as long you’ve told me that your goals were to be able to take care of me and provide me with everything I need and want. You’ve done that. You’ve told me that you want to wake up with me in your bed every morning. Roadtrips aside you’ve done that. You’ve promised me that one day you’d be a Stanley Cup Champion...I know that’s not really a relationship goal...but you’ve done that too. I could not be prouder of the man you’ve grown to be with me by your side. I could not be prouder of all you’ve achieved…” 

Pausing to breathe you watched as Jake tried to stop you but you insisted on continuing on. 

“So I was hoping that now that you’ve achieved the one goal you had before we had even met that you’d be interested in achieving another goal together.” Gingerly you handed over the box, your hands shaking as you watched him tear the paper and open it. Inside wasn’t a ring...you weren’t certain that an engagement ring was really his style, but instead was a slip of paper with four simple words printed on it in a fancy script. 

Will you marry me?

“I’m not going to get down on one knee because I think that might be a little too cliche…” You whispered, waiting with your heart in your throat for Jake’s reaction. When he nodded and kissed you, you felt your heart settle and then soar, your arms wrapping around his neck. The kiss was broken far sooner than you would have liked because Jake pulled away, his hand digging into his pocket. With whatever he was looking for in his grasp, he did drop onto one knee and the tears you’d barely managed to hold back started falling. 

“For the record...you stole my idea.” He teased. “I know I’ve been promising you for years that someday I would ask you to marry me. I fully intended to make good on that promise today…” He smirked. “So I know technically we’re already engaged but...Y/N....will you marry me?” 

“You know I will, you idiot.” You exclaimed laughing while crying. A delicate and elegant ring was slipped from the box onto your left ring finger and Jake pulled himself to his feet before pulling you in for another kiss. This one lingered as he dipped you backward, the sounds of your family and friends cheering from all around you. 

With Jake’s arm wrapped around your waist and a yellow and white diamond ring glittering on your left hand, you spent the rest of the day celebrating a Stanley Cup victory and the start of the rest of your life with the only person you could have pictured spending it with. 

It may have been years in the making but you were finally getting married.

Ring Inspiration: