i’m home now and i’m going to take step 2 tomorrow. it’s been a bit strange-- sandy is in india for the next two months to do her food internship, and my parents just sold our house the day before i got home. they are moving out in two to three weeks. i’m alone for most of the day because wesley is taking a coding class and my mom is trying to get our house in order and gardening outside. i feel baseline anxiety about this exam, stress over all the tasks i have coming ahead of me, and pretty sad that so much of my past is being packed up in boxes and put away. i expect that the latter two emotions won’t come into full force until after my nine hour long exam (cry) tomorrow. yesterday i got pretty freaked out and cried on and off throughout the afternoon. today i am alternating between reviewing last minute topics and watching old kpop youtube videos. this year is passing by so quickly and i need to remember what my mom told me last night-- i should look at my problems in a different light. how many people get to be where i am now? 22 and graduating med school in one year, planning a national conference, at home with my family members that are healthy and happy. i have so much going for me and i need to recognize that too, along with everything else that my life comes with. i need to believe in myself. i just feel scrambled? weird? like i am having an out of body experience, almost.
