#barbi.trc

the first time the 300 fox way ladies meet ronan theyre like hrm. hes pregnant. and we all say hahahaha no silly hes not pregnant hes just creating!! but lo and behold a few months later what does ronan birth into the world but a real actual child

do u ever think about how niall lynch was a devilishly handsome son of a bitch who was impossible not to like, naturally commanded the attention of everyone in the room, told stories as easily as breathing, ruled over his own particular corner of the world, didn’t even seem real until you knew him, died facedown on a gravel driveway, and then do you ever think about gansey.

fuck dating apps i want to meet someone the old fashioned way (you’re walking your bike up the last hill into town wearing your school uniform. i’m hanging out the passenger side window of my best friend’s car. your hands are beautiful. we know nothing about each other. you disappear in the rear view mirror. i close my eyes and send up a simple, inexplicable, desperate prayer to god. i say please. i have never said please in my life)

sorry for not blogging last night guys :( i was in the graveyard talking to the ghosts of people who are going to die this year

he lets me hit bc i follow him around like a guard dog and i say stupid shit just to see him smile and i drive way over the speed limit bc he wants to so bad but he never will and i stay up with him when he can’t sleep and we share a carton of orange juice and he looks like a prince in the middle of a dollar general at three in the morning and he leans back on the headrest and the dashboard lights turn his throat green and the bite of possibility is so urgently present i can feel the teeth sinking into my throat and i wonder if mine looks green to him too if he’s even looking and the car is so quiet until he says when i’m gone dream me the world something new for every night and it rips my heart out of my chest because i want him to stay or i want to go with him i just want to be by his side and there are a thousand things i want to say but i don’t say anything i just want him to come back please come back i promise i’ll be better i. where was i going with this

you spend years trying to save your best friend’s life for reasons you can’t understand because you don’t even know he’s going to die but you feel like you need to save him anyway. you think if he does die it will be your fault. so you follow him around and snap at anyone who looks at him wrong and devote yourself to him completely like a fighting dog to its master. and in the end it’s him who dies to save you and you didn’t even get to tell him how much he meant to you

me and the bad bitch i didn’t pull even though i gave him presents and free beer and called him slurs and taught him how to dream and told him my deepest darkest secrets (i killed my father and my best friend is a homonculus) and compared him to a dog and kidnapped his brother and killed myself in front of him to forever alter the trajectory of his life