Fanfic Writers: Director's Cut: ā! But maybe talk about an aspect of a fic you changed last minute? Up to you!
I have a very recent example of this, actually!
Half of Me, chapter 8 of Fugue, gave me fits. I wrote the first draft in December 2020, when I was burned up creatively, and getting what I got on paper required pulling teeth. It was excruciating. And then it sat for about a year and a half. Occasionally I picked at it, but never more than pick. Then I finished Cantata and came back to Fugue, which meant turning the lights back on for a story that is very complex and very difficult to write. Getting back in the right headspace was a hell of a thing, and I was working with a draft that hadn't been clicking quite right when I wrote it.
That chapter needed to punch on a lot of different levels, and it just wasn't punching hard enough. I needed to capture Kaidan floundering in a state of purgatory, unable to go back where he wants to go but unwilling to move forward, and then being forced to reckon with a world that was moving on whether he liked it or not, forcing him to choose whether or not to move along with it.
This was very hard to accomplish, lol.
I rewrote it three times, all three with pretty substantial changes. The final draft re-ordered scenes, changed the location and context of a scene, and added new scenes. Several of those eleventh-hour changes gave me the punch I needed:
Kaidan forgetting to pick up the eggs and berating himself for not being able to complete simple tasks.
Breaking the light bulb.
Reflecting on the 'Yang after finding Sam's shirt.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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The project is complete and I can finally share! Here is my handbound double-sided book of fics by the awesome @bagog, namely āOne New Message Waitingā andĀ āSomeoneās Waiting.ā The dust jacket and title page art are original drawings by myself, as well as a special illustration in the middle where the two stories meet. Thank you so much to bagog for the blessing and the amazing stories youāve written. Everyone please go read their work, theyāre truly a gifted writer.
Fandom: Mass Effect
Pairing: Kaidan Alenko/Male Shepard
One New Message Waiting
Someoneās Waiting
Keep reading for pictures of construction and the art inside!
Handsewn headbands my beloved. Used plain black, so that the focus wouldnāt be taken away from the jacket and endpapers.
And flipped over:
And the art in the center, where the stories connect. Given one is an AU of the other, acknowledging that in the meta felt appropriate.Ā
3) Do you prefer writing OCās or reader inserts? Explain your answer. ā¢Writing OCās. I guess Iāve done reader inserts in a way?23) Do you prefer listening to music when youāre writing or do you need silence? ā¢MUSIC!!!!33) Whatās the biggest compliment youāve gotten? ā¢That my writing style is sometimes lyrical or rhythmic. Thatās one I remember off the top of my head.41) Whatās you favourite minor character youāve written? I guess Zaeed. I wasnāt even intending on writing him to be quite honest. I didnāt even get him for awhile, but it only took one dream to set things into motion then it was all downhill from there.Weird thing is, whenever I have a dream about a character, I can usually get a better feel for them. Like some small detail like the way they smell, or something theyāre feeling in the dream, something about their presence, or how they kiss. Yes, Zaeed was a semi-sex dream. It was a little weird but I remember kissing him. Then I went on to write like a four part thing about Shaeed.Thanks B <3 You rock <3
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I write a lot of Mass Effect shorts that get posted once and then never again. Been asked a few times to make a Master List of all my fanfic stuff by year, so here we go!
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Original Works
New Skill Set
Post-war, Shepard confronts his trauma and masters all new skills to be a good father for his and Kaidanās son, Sean. Fluffy, sweet, and domestic.
An Expert on Bad Dreams
Unconventional Swim Instructor
Post-War Parallels
A series in which the āsame storyā is alternated between a universe where Shepard did not survive the war, and one where he did. Angsty, bitter-sweet lovey dovey, and angsty, respectively.
One New Message Waiting
Someoneās Waiting
Backlogged Messages
N7 Hoodie - Kaidan sorts through Shepardās belongings after he has died. Short, angsty.
Ask Box Fills
I am always super stoked to fill any random request that comes into my ask box, and in 2015 I posted a lot of Ask Memes. Below are the memeās filled according to character and then prompt. They range in length from 100-1000 words.
MShep x Joker -Surprisingly popular and the fans are great.
āGoing to Need You to Put Some Underwear On...ā
āLeave Me to Die--No Wait! Just Kidding, please help!ā
Ā First Time Cooking For Each Other
Mshenko - Much love for the OTP
āShh, thatās the Sound of Me Falling in Love with Youā
āPaid to Punch You in the Faceā Continued here...
The Fake ID with @gayscottryderāās Cal Shepard OC
Falling asleep on a date
Trembling Hands
Comfort Food, More Comfort Food
When Words Arenāt Enough
Coming Home, part 2
Yawn and Stretch
Fire, Flames and Excessive Heat
One Missed Call
Other Prompts
James and Kaidan and the Cat
Legion - The Skirt is Short on Purpose
EDI - Someoneās Greatest Fear
Archives of Special Runs
Where I try as often as possible to engage in theme weeks/months or make my own mini-series when the right request strikes me.
Sometimes I see a someone elseās headcanon and just start writing.
Kaidan and Shepard both Make it to the Citadel...
Kaidan and Shepard, SoulMate AU
Same Old Places - Ā a drabble based on @ltleflrtās Feels Like Home AU
Kaidan and Shepard - AU Shepard is the one who gets hurt on Mars
More below the cut!
Longer Prompt Fills
These fics are gifts or prompt fills that got longer than intended and became proper one-shots. Many are cross-posted to AO3, though some are not. AO3 links will be provided through the tumblr link, should you wish to see them there. They are Mshenko unless otherwise stated.
Things that Change, Things that Stay the Same
Inspired by @shepard-alenkoās story Household Hoodies, a number of thematically connected threads showing the progress of their relationship and Shepardās healing post-war, centering around the boys wearing and sharing each othersā hoodies
Thinking Back
Ben Shepard and Kaidan lie in the snow, and consider when they first knew they loved each other.
Two Rings
Far future where Shep and Kaidan have been married for years, and are still on missions together... sort of.
Pillows and Photographs
Post-war, Shepard is finally ready to sleep in a bed again. Kaidan has been making himself sick keeping a watchful eye over his recovery, but now they can both rest.
In London
Post-war, Shepard and Kaidan are making a modest living, thinking about Kahlee Sanders and David Anderson. Flashback to the first night Anderson moved into his Citadel apartment.
A Perfect Memory
In a conversation with Thane, Kaidan realizes why all of his memories of Shepard are so muddied and hard to make sense of. He realizes he is in love with Shepard.
There Are Things I wanna Say
The end of the end. After a long and wonderful life together, Shepard attends Kaidan at his deathbed. It was always a gamble who would reach the finish line first and who would go on alone.
Starting From Scratch
Post-war, Shepard and Kaidan take a well-deserved camping trip to settle down and get to know each other. Fluffy and warm.
Interspecies Cooperation
Reapers defeated, Javik reflects on his relationship with his own kind and with other races at a post-war conference for interspecies cooperation.
There, thatās all of 2015! Always love knowing what your favorites were, what you might like to see more of, or hearing requests!
Iāve had some requests to post more of these on AO3, does that seem like a thing I should do? Or would that be muddy and complicated? Any thoughts welcome. Thanks very much for always supporting me and for taking part in this game that has meant so much to me.
