#bad angels

Aziraphale’s face through this whole scene is so calm. He has no fear of Crowley at all. Not even much astonishment. That’s because Aziraphale knows that Crowley would never physically hurt him.

I can't stop thinking about Aziraphale, being sent to protect Job's goods, assuming that he's the victim of a joke.

Of course, it turns out even worse than he imagines. But the simple assumption that he is being pranked by heaven reveals so much about his experiences there and demonstrates the disconnect between this most sincere and loving being, and the callous, manipulative machinations of his ethereal colleagues.

irregular angels

So I am fascinated by Trauma and Abuse (both as a scholar and as a survivor of a toxic home environment myself) in Good Omens. This is an extension of one of my multi-part theory segments

Heaven’s Masquerade

Good Omens shows us Aziraphale and Crowley constantly coping (although often unhealthily) with the after-effects of their respective abuse and trauma. Both entities reference the way Heaven claims to “love” their angels but not once does Heaven actually cultivate healthy relationships with Aziraphale.  Instead, they masquerade as “love”.  

What they’re really asking for is ”control”. 

Example: Intimidating An Angel

Let’s examine one of the most blatant examples of Heaven’s abuse. Three angels corner Aziraphale. His supposed “siblings” who should be his closest allies, his most understanding companions,  his “side”, attack him. We can see in the above gif that although Uriel loosely holds his lapels Aziraphale is visibly shaking and terrified. Which is evident that it’s contact without consent. 

He immediately responds to the imposition wi terror, he knows that the could, and more likely would, be harmed by this contact. Which, is later seen to be correct when Sandalphon (not pictured in the Gif) punches his stomach as an act of intimidation.  Unlike Crowley’s mirrored actions, Uriel’s physical invasion of boundaries lacks respect and demonstrates an unequal power struggle.

Compare that altercation to the one that is Mirrored by Crowley:

Look at the immediate difference in body language. Sure, in the first Gif Aziraphale is surprised but the lunge, but he’s not intimidated by the attack. At first glance, it would seem Crowley’s invasion of boundaries is more aggressive and violent than Uriel’s.  However, upon closer inspection, the second gif shows that he’s not being pressed into the wall or lifted into the air. Crowley respects Aziraphale not to actually hurt him or put him into a position where Aziraphale could not escape.  There is no sign of struggle between the two. 

Whereas with Uriel Aziraphale is clearly panicking, there is no such concern in Aziraphale’s face with Crowley. There’s no shaking, no fear, no threat of death with Crowley, so we can presume that the boundary Uriel violated has not been crossed.  Rather, the consent to be touched hasn’t been violated. And that the closeness from Crowley while unexpected, is not unwelcome. In fact, Aziraphale takes advantage of the situation by taking the time to longingly inspect Crowley’s profile. 

While not the “nicest” way to be approached by his partner, Aziraphale is not scared. In fact, there’s an intimacy to the closeness. Besides the obvious hip thrust a la Crowley, and the nose touches, the second Gif shows a delay between Aziraphale’s reaction to the ex-satanic nun’s interruption and his gaze at Crowley. There’s an erotic element to the shared looks and a sense of trust here that Uriel’s attack does not share. 

Crowley’s goal is to “prove” his no-niceness, but Uriel’s goal is to intimidate. Crowley isn’t pushing against Aziraphale to show how “superior” he is to the angel, he’s doing it to show that “nice” isn’t a word he’s comfortable with. Uriel wants to make Aziraphale feel inferior to them.  

For Uriel and “the gang” it’s a means of controlling Aziraphale for his disobedience to Heaven. 

For Crowley, it’s intimacy. 

So...How Does Aziraphale Start Healing?

Aziraphale specifically needs to come to terms with the fact that Heaven, (not just angels, not just the bureaucracy, not just God, but ALL of Heaven) is the emotionally abusive, neglectful, cruelly judgmental, physically intimidating, and unsupportive “parent” to Aziraphale.  However, for much of the story, he hasn’t acknowledged it yet. 

This isn’t to say he doesn’t notice when Gabriel is cruel to him, or that Sandalphon is about .25 seconds away from smiting everything and that’s dangerous behavior, or that his calls to God are left unanswered, but he denies that these behaviors are inherent problems. The “Heavenly” behaviors we see directed towards Aziraphale, his interests, and his loves are disrespectful and belittling, but he still treats them like unquestionable authorities.  

The first step for a healthy recovery is admitting that there is a problem in the power dynamic.  At the very least, he needs to see that the terms and conditions of Heaven are unjust. 

Now, we do see Aziraphale push against his system of abuse, he lies to God for one thing, and maintains a relationship/agreement with Crowley, consequences be damned for another. But his rebellions still hold Heaven above all other relationships. It is still where his loyalties lay. At least, it’s where he claims his loyalties are, but he’s lying to himself. The bandstand scene shows us a rationalization to excuse Heaven’s treatment of him. 

Until he can admit that Heaven has hurt him, he can’t undo their damage.

Road to Recovery

I argue that the first step in Aziraphale’s recovery is when he admits that he has a problem with the end of the world. It’s not a full admission of Heaven’s fault, but it is an admission that when he does not feel comfortable with Heaven’s actions he should and CAN intervene. 

Before, with Noah and Jesus, he watched, even though he objected and was horrified by the actions against innocence. We see this again when he seems visibly upset with “all the smiting” that Sandalphon does at Sodom and Gamorah. Despite his misgivings, he doesn’t intervene (at least not on-screen). Look at the below gif. He’s clearly pained by God’s decision, but he bites his tongue. It’s not that he doesn’t want to question, it’s that he can not question. He must soldier on.

We can see that when Gabriel brings up the possibility of “something big is coming”, he is visibly perturbed. Then, once Crowley tells him about the coming of the Anti-Christ. He recognizes that his love for humanity and his life on Earth is a tipping point that he’s unwilling to give up.  But, he still does it by operating within the framework of Heaven.

The next crack happens when Aziraphale realizes Heaven is unsupportive of his efforts to save Heaven. His face visibly falls when Michael says they’ll forgive him for is an inevitable failure. He’s also upset by Gabriel who does give him encouragement, but in a tone that is clear, he thinks Aziraphale’s efforts are fruitless.  Heaven makes it clear that war is more important than love for God’s creatures.

Then Aziraphale goes to Heaven, wielding information about the Anti-Christ. He knows where Adam is, he knows the beast is released, and he knows that Armageddon is days, if not hours, away.  Yet, he falters. He’s all anxiety and nerves when he’s forced to talk to his so-called “side”, in a way he’s never like with Crowley. But this scene’s pièce de résistance is his choice to lie about the location of Adam. After first mentioning Crowley and all his wiles, he suddenly becomes uneasy. Gabriel asks “where” and Aziraphale recognizes that no one in the room cares about protecting humanity. Now, instead of the end of the world being his biggest problem, Angels (not yet Heaven) are.  This is further supported by their intimidation of him after the break-up on the bandstand.

While this scene is certainly progress towards naming his problem, he’s not all the way there yet. He meets with Crowley, and Crowley scares him because he’s not ready to admit Heaven is intrinsically abusive the same way Crowley is. He still believes that Heaven, and the angels, are on his side, that they’re doing right. He’s mortified about the very realy possibility that if he chooses Crowley, he’ll lose his divinity. His later scene summoning Metatron shows that he believes so badly that if he can only get ahold of God, everything will be sorted. But, it isn’t.  

It is only when he recognizes “hello god, it’s me Aziraphale” won’t get him shit, that HEAVEN is his problem. Not Crowley, not angels, not Hell, but Heaven is his abusive parent and he needs to pick which side he wants to be on.  

So what does he do? When he finally is pushed to the breaking point?

He chooses Crowley.