#b99oneshot

Hi! Okay so i made this lists specifically for me to write about Peraltiago (please leave me suggestion, please I need this) but everyone/ anyone feel like using this list have at it :)

1. “Wait, you want kids?”

2. “Awww look how cute this baby is!”

3. “I’m late”

4. “You used protection right?”

5. “I don’t think I’ll ever want a baby”

6. “Um, why is there a pregnancy test in the trash can?”

7. “I’m pregnant”

8. “Get that pee stick away from me!”

9. “What do two lines mean?”

10. “How much do you want to bet the babies a girl” 

11. “Its a...”

12. “Wow is that the heartbeat?”

13. “Wait is that an arm or a head or a body?” (for an ultrasound)

14. “Look at the baby bump!”

15. “Woah babe, is your stomach moving?”

16. “We are not naming our child that!”

17. “Can I touch the bump?”

18. “I’m as big as a whale!”

19. “Woah babe, you’re huge!”

20. “You know what I’m craving...”

21. “This is going to be a crazy baby shower”

22. “Not if it's my kid, it's not”

23. “My feet hurt”

24. “I can't fit into any of my pants”

25. “I just can't stop sobbing”

26. “Thank god it was just a false call”

27. “I think my water just broke”

28. “I’m never having another kid”

29. “Come on, just push, I believe in you!”

30. “What do you mean you forgot the hospital bag!?”

31. “Woah, I just had a baby...”

32. “Im a mom!” / “I’m a dad!”

33. “It’s your turn to feed the baby”

34. “There name is *insert name*

35. “Holy shit i have a baby”

36. “No-one will ever hurt you kid”

37. “I love you so much right now”

38. “He/She is perfect”

39. “So will you be the Godparents?”

40. “Im so scared im going to fuck this up”

41. “I love baby clothes”

42. “We need to go shopping again?”

43. “Did you hear that?”

44. “Say mama / dada”

45. “Haha i made her/him laugh!”

46 “I cannot believe that was her/his first word”

47. “No don’t say that! Thats a no-no word!”

48. “You’re so stinking adorable”

49. “Your mom/dad is not going to be happy...”

50. “Did she just walk”

51. “It’s dangerous with her/him crawling around every where”

52. “ how are you so fast?”

53. “Just let me call the babysitter one last time..”

54. “Do we look alike?”

55. “Maybe we should go home”

56. “Hey, youre okay”

57. “Mommy/daddy tell me a story”

58. “Its bath time!”

59.”where’s *name’s* Favourite toy?”

60. “Youre going to look so cute when im done with your hair, baby”

61. “If i kiss it will it feel better?”

62. “Stop crying now!”

63. “Hey babe, *name* is having a tantrum? What do i do?”

64. “Wow this is such a good drawing! What is it?”

65. “You got to eat it”

66. “Yeah I’ll play with you”

67. “I am now princess daddy”

68. “You’re just a little mommies/daddies girl/boy, huh!”

69. “Im sorry i cant help”

70. “Watch it again?”

71. “Im a bad mom/dad”

72. “Im so scare of being a dad/mom”.

73. “They (the kid) fell asleep in the bed”

74. “I’ll take care of you, the flu is no big deal”

75. “They (kid) wanted to cuddle”

76. “ Like parent, like baby”

77. “Its your birthday!”

78. “Surprise daddy/mommy!”

79. Holidays: Christmas/ Chanukah/ Halloween/ thanksgiving

80. “Dont freak out but i think (kid name) just broke something”

81. “I fell off my bike”

82. “Im pregnant... again”

83. “I want another kid”

84. “(Kid name) doesnt want to be an older sibling”

85. “It’s not just one (baby)...”

86. “(Kid) said that they hate me”

87. “No I’ll never be my father/mother”

88. “I juSt want one normal day”

89. “They (kid) told me i was there favourite”

90. “No i dont have a favourite child”

91. “So how was the first day!”

92. “Oh okay so a normal day of school then”

93. “Mommy im a big girl/boy now”

94. “I love you mommy/daddy”

95. “Shhhh youre my baby”

96. “That was the best recital ever!”

97. “Youre homework is too hard”

98. “Mom, dad, I have a boyfriend/girlfriend/s.o”

99. “No one can hurt you”

100. “Im a cool mom/dad”

101. “Just shut up!”

102. “I hope youre happy!”

103. “I want to be more like you”

104. “How do I change a diaper!”

105. “Yeah im a pretty good mom/dad”

106. “No more fighting”

107. “Just do the freaking dishes”

108. “I love you all evenly”

109. “Yeah i made that”

110. “But the kids want a dog so badd!”

111. “You’re being a brat”

112. “Im so proud of you”

113. “You’ll alwaya be my baby”

114. “That’s it, Youre grounded for a month”

115. “She/ he hit their little sister/brother”

116. “You got suspended?!”

117. “Im gonna kill him/her”

118. “But the daddy, daughter dance is tonight!”

119. “Her/his forehead is warm, babe”

120. “Its 3 am... what do you want?”

121. “Im not teaching you how it kiss a boy”

122. “Dad/Mom did it!”

123. “I want peanut butter and onions and i want them now”

124. “Did you take *name* out of school?”

125. “There is a baby growing in me right now...”

126 “mmm i dont want to make *name* get a shot

127. “I cant move *name* is sleeping on me”

128. “No sex ever again”

129. “Our poor kid has the weirdest uncles and aunts”

130. “I hate that im the stricked parent”

131. “Why does it looks like you have a whole circus in your hair?”

132. “I have to take *kid* to work with me”

133. “We’re going to the er”

134. “*name* teacher wants a confrince”

135. “Do you think something is wrong with *kid name*”.

136. “God you’re just like your mom/dad”

137. “I miss when you were a baby”

138. “Did you cut your hair on your own?”

139. “She/ he drank my coffee and now she’s/ he’a bouncing off the wall”

140. “Why cant i bond with them?”

141. Your own :)

Fandom: Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Ratings: General

Warnings: None

Characters: Jake Peralta, Rosa Diaz

Summary

Rosa comes to Jake with an issue that reminds him of their past.

Link

Note: no-one asked for this. literally. No-one. but i reallly wanted to write okay 😪. anyway please go suggest a drabble for me to write & enjoy:).

“Nothing bad is going to happen baby, I promise”

“Daddy?” A small voice called from where the hallway and living room met.

Jake’s head turned sharply in his daughter’s direction the second he heard the calling.

It was later into the evening, almost ten at the time. Jake had been up, trying to wrap up a case load that he couldn’t seem to solve while simultaneously watching Diehard for the third time that week.

“What’s up, mandms?” He paused the tv screen, pushing this folders of work to the side as he stood up abruptly, walking in his child’s direction.

Almost instantaneously a smile consumed his expression. Emi leaned against the wall, a tiny yawn emerged as she attempted to rub the clear triedness from her eyes. Jake almost chuckled to himself when he saw her curly dark hair amess, and her pink pajamas shifted on her body from when he had tucked her in.

‘God,’ The father though to himself, ‘She looks so much like Ames’.

“There’s a monster in my closet! I can’t sleep when there is a monster in my room!”

Jake’s expression instantly softend, he couldn’t argue with that logic, plus this was a pretty standard routine in the Peralta household.

Like many times before, Amy, now a captain, was on mission that lasted overnight. And while Jake knew that Emi liked to spend time with him, the four year old missed her mom.

He had never dismissed Emi’s blatant attempts for attention. He knew that she was way to smart to believe in actual monsters, afterall, Amy was her mother.

But he still entertained the proclaim, plus Pimemento had actually been hidding in Emi’s closet once.

He frowned slightly, leaning down to pick the little girl up “Good thing detective daddy is on the case! Nothing bad is going to happen baby, I promise”.

Jake lightly tickled her little belly, getting the littlest giggle in response that lit up his expression.

“Look,” He plopped Emi ontop of her mattress as he made his way over to her closet.

As he turned on the flashlight of his phone with one hand, the other swung the doors open, feeling his kid eye him from bwhind with anticipation.

“No monsters, Em” He shined the lights, revealing nothing but a perfectly organised closet curtesy of a one mrs Amy Santiago- Peralta.

Emi sat down, nodding her head in what was almost defeat.

“Now let me tuck you back in because it is wayyy past your bed time and mama is going be real mad if she finds out I let you stay up this late”.

“I won’t tell her, promise,” she let out a little squeak, which was an obvious lie because she told Amy everything, “But I miss mommy” her tone became sadder.

Jake sighed, nodding his head in agreement. “Here scoot your boot”. He gestured for her to move, and of course, shed obeyed as Jake smooshed his way into her tiny twin sized bed.

Immediately, Emi clang to his side, burrowing her face into his neck.

“Hey I miss her too but mama has a very important job to do” He tried, but failed, to grasp her eyes, so he kept talking.

“We both just need to go to bed and she’ll be here in the morning, okay? Then we can all go out to get ice cream?”

He looked down to kiss her forehead, ready to get up and let her be when she nearly screamed.

“No! Daddy don’t go!”

Jake just sank back to where he was, putting an arm around his little girl “Okay cool cool cool,”

He felt as Emi was content with his answer, shifting so she could fall asleep easier.

Meanwhile Peralta laid there, staring at the ceiling and smiling like an absolute idiot.

“I won’t leave, Baby... I never will”

And he didn’t. He waited until she fell asleep, but he was soon to follow.

Fandom: Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Ratings: General

Warnings: None

Relationship: Jake Peralta/ Amy Santiago

Characters: Jake Peralta, Amy Santiago, Ray Holt

Summary

She curled into him, leaning against his side as she whisper shouted at the contestants on TV. He was playing with the curling ends of her hair when it struck him how beautiful she looked right then - passionately muttering about Jeopardy of all things, dwarfed in the over sized Harry Potter hoodie she had stolen from one of her brothers. And later that night, as she pressed one last kiss against his bare chest before falling asleep next to him, hoodie long since abandoned, he felt a series of tumbles and swoops in his chest and stomach that he couldn't quite explain.

Or the one where Jake Peralta goes home to Amy Santiago every night and really wants to scream from rooftops about it. Or you know, announce it in the bullpen. Both work.

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