#azullucent

This blog post is long overdue. I started working full-time again in April after 9 months of freelance writing. I had to adjust my sleep schedule from staying up late writing every night to working a 9-5 again with a commute. The transition into balancing a new role, spending time with X, spending quality time with Mike, and maintaining my health (both physical and mental) was not easy. 

June was completely consumed by E3, Disneyland with family in L.A., Mike’s birthday, and Pride. E3 proved that my job is going incredibly well! The entire month leading up to E3 was full of long days prepping materials for the Xbox briefing. Then, at E3 I hosted 15 or more shows on the official Mixer channel interviewing game devs and publishers while promoting the next year of games coming to Xbox. It was an incredible experience leaning into my career in video games, but it was also exhausting and created the need for some chill time after we returned. 

I am finally in a really great place! However, if I’m being honest… I haven’t had time to sit and write in many weeks. I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about my new outline and consuming media to inspire a few of the additions in my story, including playing through Final Fantasy XII, which has similar themes and a surprisingly parallel story arc to my book. But sitting at my desk and actually writing has been a seemingly overwhelming feat in the midst of keeping the rest of my life afloat. 

Good news: I have two weekends dedicated to writing coming up and have crafted some time in my nightly schedule to get back to it.

I apologize for the potential delay this may have caused with my novel progress, but I think this time of stabilizing myself and finding new perspectives to help influence the characters and story will result in an even more polished final product. 

What’s next? Chapter 4 is almost ready for your eyes and instead of having another set of peer-reviewers this time I would love to open up the feedback channel to my Kickstarter backers. When I post the next chapter I’d love to hear what you love, what you didn’t like as much, and what you want to see more of.

When the Widow’s Walk expansion for Betrayal at House on the Hill was in development, I was honored to be asked to create a new Haunt with Mike. Not only do I love the game and appreciate it’s deeply thematic feel, but getting to game design with my husband was very exciting. 

Soon into brainstorming ideas, I brought up how awesome it would be to immortalize one of the characters from my novel. When Mike agreed, the choice was obvious. My absolute favorite protagonist, Captain Sting, the swashbuckling pirate captain, was perfect to be a powerful villain in the world of Betrayal at House on the Hill. 

Spoilers for the Widow’s Walk expansion - Haunt #61 below:

It was important to me to catch the feel of Sting’s sea-loving nature, her obsession with treasure, and her ability to be brutally nefarious. 

Thanks to the amazing Amanda Sharpe, I have the finished cover art for my upcoming novel! She did such an incredible job and really captured the essence of my story and my beloved characters. 

My novel, which has been in the works for over 16 years, is entitled The Explorers of Azullucent. Publishing this novel is a lifelong dream of mine and I’m thrilled for the opportunity to pursue this dream into reality. 

The Explorers of Azullucent is a young adult fantasy novel about the coming of age story of three women - a pirate, a princess, and an aspiring head chef that all want more out of life. On the brink of a raging war, all three of the women become acquaintances with a drifter who eventually brings them together. Upon meeting, it becomes clear that these women have more in common than expected. They all own the same necklace, which appears to have magical properties when the three gems are brought together. They must join forces to learn the truth behind their necklaces and also attempt to stop the war before it's too late. Follow the story of three adventuring women in the world of Azullucent, the necklaces that bring them together, and how they all find what they've been looking for.

Azullucent was inspired by my love for RPG video games and my core feminist values. I wanted to see women as the main protagonists in a fantasy story about fighting pirates, royal kingdoms, enchanting magic, and catastrophic war. I wanted to create characters I could relate to and character arcs that were empowering.

I've been creating stories since I was old enough to pick up a crayon. I started my novel at the age of 14 and finished the first draft 3 years later. I moved across the state to attend the University of Washington for a degree in Creative Writing. While in college, I got deeply involved with the gaming industry and like most adults, pursued a career.

As I approached 30, I knew something was missing. I had never followed my dream of publishing my novel. In July of 2018, I quit my job to finish my novel once and for all, revising it using the tools I'd learned while getting my degree and diving deep into my personal experiences for inspiration. 

First of all, I appreciate all of the love and support I received after my last novel progress update. 

Everyone was so understanding that life sometimes throws us more than we can handle and that my novel might take longer than expected because a full time job, motherhood, chronic health issues, and writing a novel is a lot. The numerous messages that came into my inbox full of love really made my anxiety level and fear of failure easier to deal with. Thank you <3 

All that being said, I just shared Chapter 4 with my backers! I am currently about 1/3 of the way done with my final revision before it gets sent to my editor. I have a very ambitious November goal to complete one chapter a day starting Sunday, Nov 10 through the rest of the month. If I can manage to tackle this ambitious schedule, I will have my manuscript ready for editing before the end of 2019! 

I’m a couple of weeks late posting this announcement here, but the Kickstarter for my upcoming novel was successful! 

We had an amazing party featuring local artists, writers, and game designers. Plus, a raffle to show my appreciation for all of the support.

It was down to the wire and funded with only 6 hours left. We ended with roughly $1000 over what my funding goal was. I am so grateful for the generosity of my friends, family, and the amazing community that I am blessed to be a part of. 

Honestly, I am overwhelmed by the support. I will do all I can to craft the best story that I can for my debut novel, dedicated to all the love that was given to me over those 30 stressful days. 

My plan is to finish the final revision this summer and I hope to have the eBook edited and ready before 2020. I also plan to have the physical copies in your hands in early 2020, just in time for the Seattle convention season.

You can follow my progress via my blog here on Tumblr. Feel free to reach out any time with questions or for updates. I’m happy to share every step of this journey. 

After all of the sleepless nights, sweat, and tears, the Kickstarter for my novel is finally live!

Recently I received my first round of peer-review feedback for my upcoming novel, Azullucent. 

First of all, I have updated the name of my novel to “The Explorers of Azullucent” 

This just sounds better when I say it out loud. 

I have to be honest. When I first received the feedback, I was crushed. This story that I spent years thinking about and working on (off and on) for 16 years was read by people for the first time since I was 17... and they didn’t, IMMEDIATELY love it? 

Of course not! And that’s okay. 

This was only the sixth rewrite I’ve ever attempted: the first draft being hand-written on lined paper between the ages of 14-15, the following draft being when I first typed it up at 16, and the third time was when I went through making heavy additions, finishing my novel up at 17. I did one rewrite in college and once when I first gave Mike my novel and he read it. This last summer was my first real attempt at a rewrite in six years! 

I was out of practice and returning to the world I loved with fresh eyes and a whole slew of new life experiences. I was as rusty as I feel when I try to remember how to blues dance with someone that isn’t Mike. It’s not that I don’t know how or am bad at it, I’m just not going to be flawless on my first try. 

For reference, most authors write ten or more rewrites before publishing a book. Hemmingway wrote “A Farewell to Arms” 39 times. I expect to hand my manuscript over for final copyright editing by draft 9. And I expect to finish during this calendar year. 

My friends were amazingly honest and provided incredible feedback that I totally agreed with, but there is still a lot of work to do. Most of my fears about the weak points of my novel were accurate, so at least I already knew what I needed to work on and have plenty of ideas ready to go. I feel more confident than ever in this story and believe that Kristina, Liz, and my mom are all helping me reach my true potential. 

I added a bunch of scenes to the outline for the next revision. I wrote out 5 pages of ideas for changes and completely rewrote the beginning of my novel, adding a brand new first chapter. I believe that the upcoming draft will address many (hopefully all) of the weaker traits in my writing and will strengthen the investment for the reader. The backgrounds that have been simmering in my head for all these years are coming onto the paper in ways that make sense and inspire me. I have never felt better or more excited for this story! And that is saying a lot after 16 years of feelings... 

Happy New Year! Before I dive into the list of my resolutions for the year, I’d like to take a moment to do some reflecting. I’m not where I expected to be in 2019. As scary as that feels, I am so excited for the possibilities that the new year has for me and peer hopefully into where I will be in 2020. 

2018 was full of lots of unexpected changes. Some intentional and many not. Due to where we are and what we have planned, 2019 is bound to be another year with lots of transitions.  

2019 could be a really difficult year for us. We aren’t starting from a great place, both essentially jobless, limping into the year both as freelancers. That being said, this will likely be one of the most memorable years of my life. I am launching a Kickstarter in less than 2 months from now. That is happening and decides the fate of my novel, how and when it will get published, and if I can afford to do more with it like attend conventions with my own booth, etc. This is a big leap of faith for me, but I’m thrilled to jump into the unknown this time.

I’m tenacious. I haven’t always had the easiest path in life. I grew up in poverty in a town where I didn’t belong. I’ve had my fair share of health issues. But I’ve always managed to make the best out of what I have. So far, I have approached life attempting to always be grateful and appreciative for what I do have. This isn’t always easy and I don’t always succeed, but when I do, I realize that my life is amazing. I embrace how blessed I am to have so many loved ones and incredible people in my life who truly care about me and push me to be my best self. I know that with my family and friends by my side, I can get through anything. No matter what happens, I have a wonderful partner and the most perfect child. 

With all that being said, I do have some ambitious goals for the year, including a couple that I didn’t get to last year.

2018 Goals: Here is a quick review of the goals I had for 2018 and where I currently am on meeting them:

1) Final revisions to my novel and finally getting it self-published. 

I didn’t expect to quit my job to do this, but I totally did. It isn’t published yet, but it should be by 2020.

2) Cook more and learn to cook some cool things.

Thanks to Imperfect Produce, this definitely happened! A LOT!  

3) Officially make The Lady Planeswalkers Society a non-profit organization.

This took a rather unexpected turn of events and I have now resigned as the organizer for the group to focus on other areas of myself and my career goals. 

4) Audition for at least one singing competition.

Didn’t get around to this last year, I intend to follow through this year. 

5) Learn to cut a steak (and bread) with a knife without feeling like I have no idea what I’m doing.

I think I achieved this? Progress was made at the very least. 

6) Clear out and set up our garage. 

This is embarrassing. I don’t know that we even spent one day on the garage in 2018... we intend to fix that, and soon. 

2019 Goals! 

1) Publish my novel, Azullucent!

Sorry to restate the obvious, but this is my number 1 goal of the year. Kickstarter failure or not, I plan to find a way. It will just be a lot easier and more successful if I can get some funding help.  

2) Write 1-3 Blog Posts per Week

I really want this to say 2 blog posts per week, but being realistic I want to at least make sure that I don’t miss a week. I also have no idea if or when I might start working fulltime again. Writing a blog post every day in November taught me a lot (something I intend to write about soon) and helped prepare me to blog more regularly. 

3) Read More Books

This is a complicated goal for me, and one I’m a little ashamed of given how few books I have read since college. As a writer, I believe it is crucial that I read to become better. However, I have dyslexia and reading can be quite challenging. I am a very slow reader and often have to reread paragraphs multiple times to understand them. I like reading, but it isn’t something that I often do for fun or to relax, simply because it’s hard to find a book that feels relaxing and fun to read. I have a huge backlog of books that are on my to do list and I hope to make a significant dent in them this year. My hope is to read at least 1 book per month. This might sound like a small number, but I am intimidated by the concept so I want to start small and allow myself room to grow. 

4) Rerun: Audition for at least one singing competition.

5) Rerun: Clear out and set up our garage. 

General Goals:

In a more general view of what I want for the new year, I hope to continue budgeting time for all of the things I view as important. This includes self-care, finances, and relationships. 2018 was filled with figuring out how to budget my time for my own mental health and I am very impressed with how far I’ve come.

Of course, I want to continue spending quality time with my son and my husband, but I also want to continue to find time for myself and time out with friends. My family is always my number one priority, so that isn’t really related to 2019 goals specifically. I hope to continue seeing my parents regularly, keep teaching Xander about his family, and maintain monthly date nights with Mike. 

Getting in touch with myself in 2018, I found more than ever that my extrovert nature requires socializing to feel fulfilled. There was a big shift in this realization when I stopped working in an office beside other people 40+ hours per week. I was surprised to find that I actually love time to myself, a very new feeling, and carve out time for me almost every night. On top of that, I’ve been getting out with friends on my own more often after Xander’s bedtime and find that this has been huge for my self-esteem and identity. I’m very lucky to have a strong network of empowering women to hang out with. For this, I guess I want more of the same and I hope that if I end up working a fulltime job that I can continue to fill all these buckets to a happy level. 

Lastly, I hope to keep the house clean more often than not (something that also improved when I started freelancing).  

If you are interested in my gaming goals for the year, you can read about that tomorrow on tabletop-test.com! 

I really hope that 2019 is a kind year to my family. The last couple of years have been rough and we could use some brightness.