#avoiding confrontation

Be blunt: Aries, Taurus, Gemini, Scorpio, Sagittarius, Capricorn, Aquarius

US!Sans/Plum:

-- Plum is okay with it, but he is a little worried for you. He thinks it's natural for conflict to be something you want to avoid - but hiding your feelings all the time doesn't help either.

-- He'll tell you so one day, maybe after he's seen you completely dodge a bad situation in a conversation. Plum lightly suggests that you try to bring up the problem instead of letting it go - that way, you won't be left feeling hurt and the other person will know not to do that again! When you bring up your past, Plum recognizes that this is something that may be further ingrained in you than he thinks and it fuels him to help you change the habit.

-- If you aren't up to it, or you try a few times and it goes wrong, Plum tries to step in for you. If a situation arises he thinks can be resolved with a conversation, he'll initiate the talk between both parties and moderate. You should tell him if it's too much for you, though, or else he may go overboard and start speaking for you.

US!Papyrus/Cherry:

-- Cherry understands where your coming from, but he doesn't think it's the right way to go about things either. He thinks you should stand up for yourself when needed, even if it isn't in an upfront way.

-- He generally lets you do your own thing and acts as your feelings sponge, letting you vent to him about your extreme dislike of conflict and the things you've managed to avoid. He will listen to you and at the end, after you've told him about memories in your childhood that contribute to your hesitance, he wraps an arm around you and assures you that you won't have to do much confronting now that he's around.

-- And it ends up being true - you find out in the following months, whenever you tell him about a sprouting issue he helps you handle it. He won't facilitate a talk like Plum, but he'll maneuver the conversation until both sides have to acknowledge it and then watch as you hash it out yourselves.

SF!Sans/Hunter

-- Hunter is a firm believer in facing your problems head on if the situation allows. It irritates him somewhat that you don't stand up for yourself - you're his S/O, he wants you to be able to handle yourself in most situations.

-- He probably brings it up the quickest in your relationship, and most often. He questions why you would let problems slip and eventually bubble up like that. When you reveal why, his features twist into something more annoyed. If your past is the case, then why wouldn't you make an effort to subvert that? To prove to those events or people that you are much better?

-- If you won't budge, he'll eventually accept it. But it might be a long time before he does - he's still going to badger you about it when he sees that something could have been solved had you confronted it. Nevertheless, he also begins to threaten anyone who shows any signs of being the type to take advantage of your nature - so everyone, really.

SF!Papyrus/Hound:

-- Oh boy, Hound completely understands. All he ever wants to do is avoid conflict at all times, even though he knows it's necessary to deal with it. He's the type to let things slide or quietly direct things on to a more harmonious path.

-- You don't even need to tell him about your past for him to just accept it. Hound won't bring up every instance where you've skirted a problem, but he will take note. He's more focused on helping you feel comfortable with sharing your feelings - and it doesn't even need to be with him. Hound doesn’t mind as long as you’re not letting the negativity of things sit inside you for long.

Aesthetic Moodboard || Brody Weston || Moving to Florida

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Most of the time, I behave myself. I don’t say anything I’m not supposed to. I try to make sure I don’t ruffle any feathers. I just want our time together to be as painless as possible, which typically requires me to grin and bear it.

But certain topics trigger me and I don’t play along the way they expect me to. Then everything blows up and becomes a mess, because I’m supposed to be the peacekeeper. When I start acting out, all hell breaks loose.

The good news is that in the morning, they will all pretend that nothing happened. The last thing they want is more confrontation.

So they will refuse to address it, allowing it to fester along with all of the other issues we have sidestepped over the years.

And we will keep on pretending everything is fine.

How to Avoid Confrontation with Tenants by Dan Borrero, Real Estate Investor since 1989.

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