#author ramble

Now that I have caught up on ComicFury here, I will explain how uploading will work on Tumblr.

I will continue uploading in bulk, trying to do a scene at a time. That means that ComicFury will always be ahead of Tumblr.

This is purely just to make it easier for me, since I upload four pages in a week and unlike ComicFury, I can't schedule the uploads here so I would have to do it manually (idk maybe you can schedule but I would still have to come in and fix the links manually) and I got tired of manual uploading on Instagram. That was also one unspoken reason I left that app.

hi everyone💞 as some of you perhaps have noticed, I haven’t been very active recently, and that has culminated because of many reasons which I will simplify and hopefully explain

1.) I’m in love!🙈

I met this wonderful guy at the airport (of all places???) whom I’ve now been seeing for a month, and things have been going steady, and we’re inching toward a relationship that I think will be very very good for me!🥰 y’all would like him if u saw him tihi he’s eye-candy and he unironically reminds me of a certain somebody, because this guy is also 6’4, Scandinavian, has green/blue eyes, and the world’s most wonderful nose😭😭 he works in an office and godDAMN he reminds me so so much of Mr. Godfrey in Brat because holy shit this man is also a freak tihiiiiii ANYWAY

so… yeah, I’m very in love with this guy. crushing badly, to put it lightly, and I’ve always said that I lose interest in writing whenever I’m in love/have a crush/have anything with anyone in real life, and that’s exactly what’s happening rn

I’ve honestly tried to get back into writing and editing, but I’m very not interested and I don’t have a passion for it anymore, mostly because all my passion is getting poured out into something happening to me in my real life, and writing has always been a form of escapism when I feel alone… and I don’t anymore. I have companionship. I have love. I have sex (soon tihi). I’m content, and therefore don’t have a drive which makes me want to write anymore

also, I feel a bit odd writing about another man now?? now that I’m in love w my guy, I feel rlly weird trying to fantasize about Bill, and I feel like I’ve therefore kinda lost my attraction? no, back up, Bill is hot as fuck, but the only man who makes my tummy flutter now is MY man😛😛😛 lol it’s so weird but oh well

2.) this place is weird

yep. the title. more often than I’d like, I encounter a lot of naggers (and NOT those of you who are lovely and write sweet messages and genuine questions about updates and stuff!!!! I love you sweethearts!!!!!) and now I’m only talking about the annoying ones like

‘where’s the chapter’

‘next update when’

‘update’

‘bruh why don’t you update xyz’

‘are you still writing brat? why did you discontinue brat? write brat.’

what happened to hello? I AM NOT A FUCKING MACHINE. OH MY FUCKING GOD. THERE IS A PERSON BEHIND THE SCREEN. I AM A PERSON.

I BLEED!! I HAVE STOMACH ACHES!! I OBSESS OVER MY NEW GUY’S EX!! I CRY!! I SMILE!! I BREATHE!!!!!!!

I AM A PERSON.

holy fucking god I am so fucking annoyed with internet culture these days!!!!

but I also want to specify that the sweet messages I’ve gotten are all screenshotted and put in a wonderful folder on my phone, and you guys have meant the world to me. I’m always reading my inbox, so please always feel free to send me something, just PLEASE, I beg, if you want to ask about the progress of a chapter, ask NICELY🫠 literally adding an emoji does all the difference ugh anyway

3.) school!

failed all my exams except for one. I have a lot to prep for my re-exams at the end of this month. I have been way too occupied with being in love, which is very on-brand for someone as emotional as me, but at least I’m getting eaten out OOP WHO SAID THAT??? omg scandalous, must’ve been the wind or smth…..

ANYWAY, TO SUM IT UP, I will take an official break from writing from now on, just until I feel like I want to do it again! I have no idea how long that is gonna take, but I am still here on tumblr and I check it multiple times every day, so I will not be gone! I might pull up with a oneshot here and there, but for now I’m parking my projects… ugh my heart feels so heavy writing this out, but this is gonna be a huge relief for me as well.

my tumblr has become my second life and my undercover business. I need to focus on my real life for the first time in one and a half years

The Stranger will be gender-locked to female.

No more Paul. Say Hi to Paula.

Why? For so many reasons. And I have to admit, even for plot reasons I like this even more now... you'll see 😏

Hi Lilith,

Thank you so much for this amazing share! You brightened my day—several days, actually, as I read it as soon as you sent it but didn't have time to properly reply until now.

I'm thrilled to hear how much you're enjoying The Eternal Library!

This is my favorite story I've come up with thus far, one that's been brewing for five years. I'm so glad to hear the work I've done on it comes across in your reading experience. I've gone deeper into the character building of this cast than any other I've written.

A large part of that is because I'm writing this IF on my own time, rather than under contract. It was an honor writing for Heart's Choice, and I'm immensely grateful to my editor for guiding me as I figured out how to move from linear writing to interactive novels. I'm glad to have two titles published by HC, and grateful for everyone who plays those games!

But I tell you, I don't miss the deadlines.

Deadlines are extremely helpful to get a project to completion, but now that I've written two IF novels in under three years (TMP and INK), I know I can do it. I know I can get through the hard parts in the middle and the seemingly-impossible task of tying up all the lose threads and variables at the end. But without deadlines writing doesn't have to be all consuming, and rather than forcing myself to get it done I can let this story breathe and enjoy life along the way.

I've given myself permission to take my time with TEL, which is doubly good as it's the most challenging and ambitious project I've worked on. One of the results of that decision is that I get to write character interviews and POVs that give me more insight into who they are. Some of these are free on my Patreon, while others are available to paid subscribers. Having a Patreon has been fabulous motivation to go deeper into character building and worldbuilding, and I'm honored that people enjoy the story enough to want that kind of content.

As for heat level, yes, Their Majesties' Pleasure goes from zero to sixty in three chapters flat. It's a romp and a revel and I really played around with having sweet options and extra spicy ones, plus everything in between. I pushed the limits of my writing in ways I hadn't before, and tried to allow a range of choices for all types of readers.

In Ink and Intrigue, I explored the intimacy that could be built with the RO characters from a different angle. While there is still plenty of spice, it's a tone or two milder than TMP to fit the setting and culture of that story.

I have to tell you, though, I'm reeeeeeally enjoying writing this slow burn. There's something magical about secret looks and brushing hands, and a romance blossoming over time as relationships deepen and mutual trust unfolds.

the stories just sucked me right in and now i'm trapped and i don't even care it's wonderful 🥺🥺😭😭❤️❤️❤️

Where do you people live? We had a snow storm yesterday and we have 5 to 0 degrees outside.🌨️☃️🌦️

Ya'll, when I tell you that I was absolutely GIDDY when I got this comment. I'm so frickin' happy that someone else appreciates accurate medical stuff in fanfiction, and that MY medical writing is logical.

Healthcare peeps, rise up!

i feel like this connects back to the original vhaeraun of the forgotten realms, back before lolth followed kethryllia to faerun in evermeet. it talks about how much lolth liked the ilythiir for their fierceness and ambition and trappings, but as we've seen in the pressure cooker of menzo, lolth's way of doing things doesn't lead to the sort of society that seems to actually impress her (seemingly). now she does weird gambits like stealing moander's portfolio, trying to make the demon weave (where she'd then subjugate the males further and not allow them to learn arcane magic either)... things that are kinda antithetical to developing the sort of society that made people like ka'narlist. i think in modern times, this is part of the reason she's never used her power to eradicate the twins from existence, they serve a purpose to her... in the sense of building things for her to then twist or corrupt whenever it suits her. children are supposed to labor for the benefit of their mother, as far as she's concerned.

but the vhaeraun of that time (before -24400DR) had a pretty successful kingdom going. like they had negotiated with the dragons and endured a dracorage. i don't think you can manage to have that sort of society solely on evil, especially given when it's talked about it goes from "concerns about expansion" to "actual war crimes" only after lolth's arrival and rise to power. not even with ghaunadaur around did ilythiir act like that. the first recorded major skirmishes that soured things were with orishaar in -20000DR. vhaeraun had about 7,000 years of successful rule before lolth's influence began to overtake his, due to the nobility's bullshit.