#au19

doubt is my companion

she thinks she understands

everything you’re thinking

she holds my heart in her hands

she tries to hold it gently

but she can’t help but squeeze

if you start to lose interest

her nails pierce, i bleed

i can hear her breath shaking

when it starts to get too much

the only thing that soothes her

is the feeling of your touch

a surprise kiss on my cheek

a gentle hand on my thigh

and when i catch you staring

au where you and yukhei are childhood best friends pining after each other (19/?)

i wanna know how you feel

wanna know what you know

tell me something, baby

do you know how you feel?

can you pin it to a word?

can you say it with ten?

sorry, i missed that

lonely in a bed

your voice in my head

at the end of the day

without a word to say

just across the sheets

a memory to keep

time would slow down

having you around

kisses firmly pressed

warmth in my chest

now the window’s open

fantasy is broken

eight days, nine nights

my yellow bedroom lights

a silence haunting

i’m a siren calling out

come to me, don’t make me doubt

i get lost in your eyes

but i’m still lost by the sunrise

i like to act like i’m tough

but am i too much? am i enough?

i could ask question by question

instead i study your expression

make a guess, hope it’s right

you wouldn’t stay if you didn’t like

hide this side of me

i hope you never see

how crazy i can be

anyone would break free

i’m the one locked in by anxiety

i’m scared of society

don’t let me push you away

it’s just that i’m not okay

i wish i was wrong

but i’m writing this song

to get out of my head

wish i was in your bed

you make it easy, babe

but i know it’s too late

my thoughts have escaped

i got them on tape

let me out, let me out!

hey

i just wanted to say

i'm sorry for the way i behave

i hate to blame it all on my brain

but she can be so hard to contain

so will you forgive me babe?

honey

i know you love me

you call me a lot lately 

actions over words, naturally

when you do, i count myself lucky 

one step forward

one step back

one step forward

don’t look back

take care when you step

i feel like something’s changed

maybe something hurt you

maybe it’s not too late

maybe it’s just my mental health

getting in the way

cuz at night, alone, i hate you

when i’ve been loving you all day

vague signals you send

guess i can pretend