#aster gemini

The mass of computer banks lining the walls was mostly for show, to give the appearance of superior computing power without needing to actually purchase enough silicon to render an atom-perfect simulation of a large galaxy. A holoscreen sixty feet long lit up one wall in a soft blue glow, pulsing gently with a standby message and the AceraTech logo. "Well. This is it. Should get us everything we need to know." Aster slid herself to the floor next to a particularly large computer which was probably real.

"And you're going to hack it with your mind?" Lana had always wanted to see this in action, but now she was a little apprehensive. Was it dangerous? If it went badly, could Aster be hurt?

"Not with my mind, per se. The bots will do most of the hacking, but I will be processing and storing the information myself, they don't have anywhere near enough memory. Shouldn't be too difficult, quick in and out, figure out how they heard about me and what they're planning to do..." She pulled a sort of cable out of one of the bodysuit's many pockets and connected it to the base of her skull, hesitating a few moments to give the nanobots time to travel down it before connecting it to the side of the panel. She smiled reassuringly at Lana, then closed her eyes, concentrating.

"Just eating through the casing here, nothing to be worried about. Ahh, there we go. Mm. Data. I've missed this, haven't had my mind hooked up to a station level computer in maybe a decade... Let's see what we can find here... Dossier, mostly incorrect... Travel logs, wonder how they got those, gonna have to be more careful if I'm being tracked... Whoops, that looks private, shouldn't have that on your work computer... Oh! Oh no. How did they get this?"

"What?!" Aster's alarmed tone put Lana right on edge.

"Those are real, accurate schematics of what one of my nanobots looks like, correct serial number algorithm, unique metal alloy, everything. They've got DynaCorp research on how the slurry works, they know every detail of how the replication and construction are done, tissue repair, even how I fly the ship. Everything. And the files seem to have been pulled off of a DynaCorp server during a hack six months ago. All of this is Steele's stuff. He must have stolen bots without my knowledge and done these experiments..."

"You are blackout drunk on the station a lot..." Lana reminded gently.

"I don't- nevermind. Probably my fault, yeah. But this is not good. I'm going to see if I can do a wipe of this data, nobody should have this... Almost there-aah!"

"Aster?" The biomech's face was screwed up in pain, hand hovering near the plug but not pulling it out yet, strangled sounds scraping from her throat.

"Been caught... firewall... burning me out..."

"Then disconnect it!" Lana nearly screamed, lunging for the cord herself. The force with which she slammed herself into Aster's free arm, now extended, holding her at a distance, winded her entirely.

"No! I need to delete that data... Have to... argh!" Not only was the alien's nose starting to bleed, but green streaks of bloodstained tears were also beginning to stain her face.

"It's not worth it! You'll kill yourself!"

"Have... oh... okay, let's go then..." She ripped the cable from its dock and stood up entirely too quickly. "Come on, don't have all day!" She stalked off toward the way they came in, still bleeding from the nose and eyes. No way was she alright, but Lana couldn't push her up into the vent anyway, so might as well let her do it herself.

Aster almost made it all of the way through the vent system to the Infinitas, but upon dropping out of the aperture on the other side wasn't able to keep her feet and crashed to the floor. With the destination in sight, Lana heaved the other girl up and dragged her toward the ship, banging on the outer door. Nova had it open in moments.

"What's she done to herself now?" they asked breathlessly. "It doesn't matter, let's get her in, we need to go! This whole place is going to be in lockdown in a moment." Nova could carry Aster all on their own, and placed her into the strange pod-like contraption Lana had seen upon first entering the ship all those months ago. "Keep an eye on her, I'm going to have to fly this thing, and I'm not sure how good I'm going to be at it..."

They installed themselves into Aster's chair, the locking mechanism biting into their skin, bereft of the usual ports, but their bots began wiring them to the ship's systems almost immediately. The Infinitas lurched into the air and out of the docking bay out into the stars.

Everything had seemed fine before then. Both biomechs had been stuffing themselves full of various edibles Lana had never seen before (though they were taking the time to teach her how to eat the few things she dared to try), a little girl had been fascinated with Aster's seven-foot height and asked to take a tri-film with her, the chef who seemed to know them had brought out a cake at no charge. Lana had been having fun until the conversation had turned to an eventual return to the stars.

"I've been doing the drive burn calculations and I think I can get us back on schedule if you don't mind spending a good month in deep space with no landings, Lana." Aster took another deep draft of what was probably beer.

"Oh, uh, I guess I'll find out if I mind. I've never done that before but I'm not sure what will happen if I'm late for my assignment. Though they might give me a bit of leeway since it wasn't our fault we got hit..."

The smile fell from Nova's face a bit. "Oh... do you two have somewhere to be? The quantum drive's not really that broken is it?"

Aster blinked confusedly. "Of course it is, why would I have told you I needed to rebuild it if I didn't?"

"I thought it was, you know, an excuse to come see me and everything... You... didn't actually mean to come here at all, did you."

"I have a visiting schedule, and this was definitely early, babe. It's nice to be here and all, but I do still need to get Lana to Alpha Centauri. You did order those parts, right?"

Nova put down what they were eating. "Yeah, I just thought they'd be spares or something. You're really careful about taking care of your ship, I guess I assumed you were combining getting to see me early with giving me extra money in a way I wouldn't refuse. In my head, it was really thoughtful of you."

"I'd give you anything you asked for," mumbled Aster through more food, "you just never ask for anything and refuse what I do try to give you."

"Maybe I'd let you do things for me if I felt like you actually wanted to see me once in a while."

Aster actually stopped eating. "What?"

"You only come to see me once a year, when you do you only stay for a week or two. Your letters are short, infrequent, and newsy, and your new friend didn't even know you had a partner, did she?"

"You did refuse to answer that question," Lana reminded, unhelpfully.

"You asked me if I had a boyfriend, which is a completely different question, and I still don't have an answer for it. They're my partner, we don't use other words for each other, it's not-"

"You refuse to let anybody know I exist! Gods forbid that anyone knows the great Aster Gemini has feelings!"

"It's not about that-"

"Where's the bracelet I gave you?"

"What?"

"When we started dating ten years ago I gave you the other half of my broken-heart necklace, you wore it as a bracelet until you left and I haven't seen it since. 'I give you my heart,' I said, and you won't even wear it. Where is it?" Aster's eyes met Lana's as if looking for help, none of which she could provide.

"It's on the ship."

"Where?"

"Somewhere safe."

"You don't know!"

"Of course I know! It's in a box, under the floorplates, by the quantum drive's maintenance board."

"Oh, yes, because nothing in your entire place can look like you have a partner!"

Aster sighed. "What do you want me to say?"

"What do I- I want you to admit it!"

"Admit what?"

"That you're ashamed of me!" Lana wasn't even sure they heard Aster's quiet protests as they stormed out. The tall biomech sighed deeply once again and continued to eat.

"Wait, you're not going to go after them?" Lana stared incredulously at the still-hungry alien.

"There's little point to that. Talking to them doesn't really get them out of moods like this. Plus, someone's got to finish this food."

"You guys have this argument a lot?"

"Not infrequently."

"Also, you only come see them once a year? That's a little crazy, they must miss you something awful..."

Aster drained another pitcher of some kind of alcohol and let another sigh leak out of her. "What Nova doesn't understand, because I'm too much of an idiot to be able to tell them, is that I love them so much that I can't come see them more often. People I care about die, Lana. Always. With one hundred percent certainty. They die young and painfully. I... can't stand to lose Nova. I can't. If there's no evidence that I have... an attachment... no one will come looking for them as a way to get to me. I can disguise the visits as business, I can hide every present they give me, I can bury my emotions inside of me, and I do because I have to. If something happened to them because they chose to care about me... I'd never forgive myself." Aster's voice broke slightly, she cleared her throat and took another drink. Lana had never seen her cry.

"You should head back to Nova's. I'll finish up here. You can bring the stuff back to the ship if you like, or stay there if they'll let you..." Lana started to speak but was cut off. "No, go on. I'm liable to get blackout drunk tonight anyway..."

Lana pulled her bag off of the chair and exited the restaurant, returning to the afternoon sun and its reflection off of the oily streets and buildings. Somehow, it was no longer beautiful...