#assholeface

I was ranting to kayla about you today and your stupid shit and ughh fuck you i hate how i'm holding this damn grudge like a stupid child

and your stupid face comes into my stupid head and UGH

i feel like such a little kid because all i can think is STUPID

idk I just need to STOP doing this how can one move on from stupid emo shit when they sit there and take it upon themselves to LOOK THE DICK UP ON FACEBOOK

nahh I'm friends with his girlfriend SOMEONE TELL ME WHY PLEASE IDK

But he's bitch ass deleted me sometime last year. Why? BECAUSE HE'S A DUMBFUCK and he probably got tired of all my indirect-direct "hey fuck you ____ you amazingly fucking dicky-dick" statuses because that's how i vent my feelings oN THE INTERNET LOOK AT ME NOW

and what pisses me off more than anything is the fact that seeing pictures of he and his girlfriend stirs up some fucking ridiculous feelings inside me and for some reason I can't let that go EVEN THOUGH I WANT TO

I am so DONE with these dumb fucking feelings! Nothing in my life and I mean fucking NOTHING has ANYTHING to do with that fucktard bitch ass fucking assholeface DICK anymore than my life has to do with fucking kangaroos or something shit idk

letting someone affect you THIS FUCKING MUCH after more than a year of never speaking is UN-FUCKING-HEALTHY but that doesn't change anything does it nope not with me because I'm fucking RIDICULOUS

It's like for some unknown to me reason God took a rope and tied my heart to Assholeface's and only I know that ITS STILL FUCKING THERE that dickwad is totally unaware and even though I think about him daily multiple times a fucking day i barely TALK about him so my friends aren't totally aware you know

I mean Kayla and Kamari know but we don't continually talk about it I think that Rae knows but she NEVER brings it up like the good best friend she is... hell even Taylor knows but he is smart enough to realize it's deeper than I let on... I dunno like just because they know doesn't mean they get it and I don't mean that offensively I am simply stating a fact.

I mean I seriously DO think about him everyday which is pitiful and shameful but whatever I'm used to it now. What I'm getting at is that some days I can think about GOOD memories and even smile even if it's vengefully or wryly or even a smirk I SMILE but then there are the rare occasions where I LOSE MY SHIT when he comes into my head and I just.... I DON'T KNOW I JUST LOSE IT

I hate to fucking cry I really do but HOW MANY FUCKING TIMES HAVE I CRIED FOR HIM?!

Ugh I fucking hate him. I really fucking do. And I'm not sad, not crying, no. I AM PISSED

I am irreversably PISSED right now because it just NEVER ENDS

there ARE certain times when it goes into the recesses of my mind and can just hole up there for awhile. Like when I'm with my best friends doing something fun, or when I'm with Kamari. You know, positive feelings take over so the negative are ignored... but that doesn't mean that the moment I'm alone again they don't come back.

I really wish he knew what the fuck he's done to me but then again what difference would it make? He doesn't get two fucks he barely did when we were friends he's never cared how I felt

No matter if he asked or seemed concerned or not

I fucking hate you, Assholeface. I hope you realize that. Obviously you can live with it