*cliNGs to and kisses*

not even angel magic can heal nipple wounds now let us do the mouth battle

you're surprised by how smooth i am aren't you

will the state of my nipples affect weather or not we make out?

About three things I was absolutely positive: First, Barack was a vampire. Second, there was a part of him-and I didn't know how dominant that part might be-that thirsted for government. And third, he was unconditionally and irrevocably the President of the United States.

siddown son, lemme tell you a war story. So once upon a time after the pineapple child thing, another pineapple pops up and this fugly bitch’s name is piney, who then starts freckling adam which is weird cuz we’re in the same bod and you can bet ur ass it’s inconvenient, tropical fruit isn’t my kink. im not saying it’s bondage but it isn’t not

I mean, um ew