I have to say, out of a lot of random conversations I've had, a few I've had with you might just earn the prize of "Most Random", because honestly; what haven't we talked about? We've discussed how it seems that most of us RP'ers were once upon a time serial-accidental-animal-killers (and you laughed at me, even though I'm technically the only one who never... killed anything). We've had a near hour conversation (it really was, because I kept laughing at you because of your adorbs reaction and everything) about how you severely injured your boob when walking into a door and that the whole floor was covered in your tears—the room was flooded. You've tried to convince me that my cats aren't cute at all and that the only cute animals in the entire world are ducks; you've even chased them (I swear you told me this) because you wanted one so badly. You call all that cute, I call it an unhealthy obsession yet so totally you. We've had discussions that would sometimes last hours over a ship. We're not crazy, I swear. We're just.... dedicated, right? Yep, that's it!

But on a serious note, what I'm really trying to say is thank you—for always having been there for me in case I needed someone to talk to. For putting these endless smiles on my face and for being a first-class goofball with me. For laughing, for not judging me as much as you most likely should (...well, you do kind of judge me pretty hard). For just being an overall amazing friend who I will never, at any point, take for granted. You're in my pocket and I'm never letting you leave, you precious human being.

I hope your birthday is a wonderful one and that you're showered with love, smiles, laughter and an endless supply of Nutella. Because you must always have Nutella and if you don't, you have to go to your local supermarket and let your obsession be known, so that an employee keeps a secret stash of it hidden for you; trust me, people understand the craving of the Nutella. Anyway,

“I remember what drove him. I understood it, I understood him. And for you to do the same, you need a take a step back and realize what happened a very long time before you were ever born. He was someone very unfairly mistreated, told every day he was inferior by a man who he had viewed as his father for perhaps his entire life; a man who he learned to fear as he grew up. He had a mother who turned her back on him when he needed her most. His baby brother died in his arms. And me—” The elder Petrova swallowed to restrain herself from finishing her sentence, “Him and his siblings were murdered to become what they are today, only to be hunted down for centuries by the same people who were responsible for their turning—their parents.

“Our emotions are heightened, fear is led by our emotions… the fear amplified. The spell his own mother cursed him with—breaking it would result in him, for possibly the first time in his life, being strong, untouchable. He wouldn’t need to be afraid anymore, because no one could hurt him any longer. I get it, you have no idea how much I get it. He just wanted to feel safe, for longer than just a mere second. A feeling almost estranged to him.” 

“How could you ever expect someone whose life had been dictated by mental, emotional and physical pain, someone who never truly experienced any form of acceptance—how could you expect anyone who’s been put through that, to not break as a result? His fear is what has become the one thing that has driven his entire existence and it turned into greed.”

“How could I still be in love with him? Because despite everything he’s been put through, he still possesses the ability to forgive me for my wrong-doings. I still love him because somehow, he still is and wants to be strong for me, just like I want to be for him. I’m still in love with him because our pasts are responsible for having created a bond so strong, that even eternity can’t break it. I’m still in love with him because he’s the reason I’ve pulled through—he’s the reason I’m still alive today.”