for the ask meme: discover & venture
discover: what are 5 things you’ve learned about yourself or life as a whole this year?
1) The qualities I hate most about myself are actually some of my greatest strengths
2) I’m a very angry person, I just don’t show it that often or easily/it’s usually just self-directed. I thought I was just sad but it turns out I cry when I’m super pissed, too. lol
3) I do, in fact, have OCD, despite not seeming to adhere to many of the typical criteria. But uh. Man do I have OCD lmaoÂ
4) I’m not actually that good at some things I thought I was good at, and that’s ok
5) I have no chill. J has been telling me this for seven years and I’m just starting to believe her because I literally don’t know how to relax lmaoÂ
venture: name 3 new things you tried this year
1) coworking on zoom with other PhD candidates working on their dissertations—this was pretty much what allowed me to finally (finally!!!!!) submit my first chapter to my advisor after having worked on it for uh. 3 years. OCD, we hate to see it.Â
2) writing letters to an incarcerated person through Black & Pink
3) taking a novel-writing workshop with a friend and actually seeing my horrible little gay characters causing problems in my horrible little world (I’m pitching it rn as what if The Secret History, but gayer and with Jewish demons?)Â