#ask para

“This is the most disgusting thing I’ve ever tasted.”

“Neil, it’s a brownie.”

“It’s so rich. Only saving grace is the nuts.”

“That is what I’m know for.”

“Your nuts?”

“Fuck you, you know that’s not- oh my god, Jesus Neil why are these salty?!”

“That’s what I’m known for.”

~

Andrew: and now we carefully fold in the eggs

Neil: okay * folds in whole eggs without cracking them *

-

Andrew: separate your egg whites

Neil: how do I do that

Andrew: I thought you watched all my videos

Neil: I did, I did.

Andrew: I’ve separated egg whites before

Neil: …are you sure

Andrew: we’re moving on. There’s lots of ways you can do it. Some people use a bottle to get the yolk out, some people do like a seesaw motion-

Neil: oh, okay. * vigorously shakes egg *

-

Andrew: grab your fruit-

Neil: * reaches back and grabs Andrew * got it

-

Andrew: now I’m not one for dramatics

Neil: * looks into the camera like he’s on The Office *

-

(Blindfolded)

Neil: okay now eggs

Andrew: what kind of eggs?

Neil: uh. They’ve got brown shells. Free range

Andrew: good to know. But whole eggs?

Neil: no last time you got mad at the shells being in your food

Andrew: so…the egg minus the shell?

Neil: yeah. No shell, just how you like. Oh, also I added bacon grease and cinnamon

Andrew: what…what the fuck are you making

Neil: it’s one of your recipes

Andrew: I have never used that combination in my life

Neil: well I had to make a few substitutions

Andrew: a few?!

Neil: I couldn’t find the butter

Andrew: did you check the drawer in the fridge? Where we keep the butter?