#asellus.writes

His embrace is enough to make you forget that today is your last day. Your mind is so jumbled that it’s hard to process what you should do next. You have to go back, you know that. You start work again in two days, putting an end to your little summer fantasy, as much as you hate it. But the pull to stay with Iwaizumi and keep pretending that this could lead somewhere is just as strong. He makes you feel safe and loved, welcomed within his arms like you belong there, even after such a short time.

A short time.

It makes you sigh, hiding your face in your hands with a groan. Are you really considering giving up your entire life—especially the job you worked for tooth and nail—for a guy you just met?

You know it’s a bad idea. You’ve told your friends the same when they were sure their new boyfriend was “the one” (and were, as expected, wrong). So what makes your situation any different? Reality smacks you in the face harder than Iwaizumi punched Oikawa. You don’t really know Iwaizumi, other than the date you had and the night you shared. And yet you had willingly given him your virginity, in front of his ex-boyfriend no less, because for just a moment, you wanted the world to stop for the both of you.

Only it can’t.

“Hey.” Iwaizumi’s voice is gravelly with sleep, his chin sharp on your shoulder as he pulls you impossibly closer. You hadn’t even noticed him wake up. “What are you thinking about so hard?”

“It’s nothing,” you smile, tilting your head back to give him a small reassuring smile. “Only that I want to say goodbye to Mattsun and Makki.”

“Hm,” Iwaizumi hums, trailing his lips over your sweaty shoulder as his hands begin to wander over your skin. You swallow, putting a hand over his wrist to intertwine your fingers, but it doesn’t stop him from swiping over your inner thighs with your joined hands. “Can you talk to them later?”

“Hajime?”

When he swipes his fingers over your sore cunt, you gasp, grinding back into him. You can feel him growing hard on your back again, and he grinds into you to make sure you know it, too.

“I want to spend a little more time together.” His voice is more than gravelly now—it’s heavy, laced with the want that is prominent against your ass. “Go later.”

His fingers pry open your folds, fingertips running over the remnants of his cum in you, gathering the slick to move up to your clit. You’re tired and sore, but you cling to him anyway, letting go of his hand to grab the back of his thigh. Your nails dig into his flesh as he starts rubbing circles, lips ghosting over your shoulder and neck until you’re murmuring at him to kiss you.

It’s an awkward angle but you make do somehow, the drags of his lips and tongue against yours much too slow and calculated for it to be just a one night ordeal. You aren’t sure what hurts more: that your body is already singing for him after such a short time, that you know this happiness and pleasure can’t last, or that when he pulls back, his eyes hold so much love and concern for you that it makes you shiver.

“If you’re too tired, we don’t have to,” Iwaizumi offers.

You wish he wouldn’t be so caring toward you, because it makes your heart flip and your decisions that much harder.

“I’m okay, promise.” You force a smile to reassure him before turning in his embrace, hands on his shoulders pushing him to lay down on the bed. He goes easily, smirking up at you as you climb into his lap and settle with your throbbing pussy over his hard cock. “Can I?”

“You don’t even have to ask,” he grunts, hands on your hips helping you grind against him.

Your cheeks burn at the sight of him below you. His chest is already heaving, skin flushed and slightly dewy from your multiple rounds. His stomach ripples with his groan when the head of his cock bumps against your clit, and you steady yourself on his chest before grabbing his cock and sinking down on it. It burns slightly thanks to your soreness, but it’s not enough to make you want to stop. Especially not when Iwaizumi’s grip tightens and he helps you squirm until he’s fully buried inside of you for the third time.

“Fuck, I could live here,” the lumberjack jokes, rocking up into you with a heavy exhale as he momentarily throws his head back at the sensation.

It’s scary how much you mean it when you immediately respond, “Me too.”

There’s something about the way he stares up at you—at your blown pupils, swollen lips, marked body thanks to his passion from earlier. It’s like he can see right through you, can read your troubling thoughts, and it makes your breath catch in your throat. It’s too vulnerable, too nerve-wracking. You’ve never had someone be able to read you like a book, and you have to tear your eyes away from him before you can reveal anymore of your secrets.

Before you can show him how much you already want to be his.

Instead you start moving, lifting and dropping your hips to sear the feeling of his cock inside you into your memory. When your walls squeeze him, he grunts, hands moving up your back and sides until he can cup your breasts. He kneads as you move, lifting his legs to fuck up into you to get even deeper. You whine, falling into him as you move faster, trying to clear your mind of the jumbled mess it’s becoming.

The bed squeaks beneath you, mixing with your pleasured sounds as Iwaizumi continues to hit that spot over and over that has you mewling and digging your nails into his pecs. Your thighs burn as you move but you don’t dare stop, not when Iwaizumi sounds so good grunting beneath you every time he ruts up.

“Can you touch yourself for me?” The question makes you squeak in surprise, and there’s a small smirk on his face when your gaze flicks up to his. “I wanna see it.”

He’s already given you plenty of orgasms that you aren’t sure you can have another, but you oblige anyway, fingers trailing down to your swollen clit. Iwaizumi exhales through his nose as you start to finger your clit, digits sliding easily thanks to the mix of your wetness and Iwaizumi’s earlier cum. His eyes are focused on the movement, cheeks red as he bounces you on his cock for his own benefit.

“Hajime,” you whine as you move faster. It feels so good with him hitting deep and your movements flushing heat through your body. Your clit throbs as you work quickly, chasing another high that surprises you with its intensity.

“Fuck yeah, that’s it,” he compliments, voice choked off with his groan. “So fucking pretty.”

His words spike pleasure in your stomach, and it doesn’t take very long until you’re whimpering and clinging to his chest, your eyes squeezed shut as you try to finish. His hands come to your ass, gripping your cheeks as he rocks you, gruff voice edging you along. Come on, you feel so fucking good, show me. It’s all too much—you snap with a hoarse cry of his name, biting your bottom lip as you shudder forward with your orgasm.

Iwaizumi helps you along, keeps you rocking as your walls spasm and clench around him, juices dripping down his cock. Only when you grow quiet in hopes to catch your breath does he flip you over so you’re beneath him again. You squeak, clinging to his shoulders when he pushes in again, your legs wrapping around his waist to bring him closer. He sets his hands next to your head and begins a brutal pace, one that has you raking your nails down his back and pushing to bring him closer.

His lips mash against yours, his tongue as fast as his sloppy thrusts. You can barely keep up, not that you mind, because Iwaizumi’s cock dragging along your sensitive walls feels too good. The way he pants and groans against your lips leaves you dizzy, and when he bites down on your shoulder with his orgasm, you cry out and tug him closer. Warmth floods you another time, and you don’t think you’ll ever get used to the way it feels like it spreads throughout your entire being, letting you panting and needy for more.

Iwaizumi collapses against you, head resting on your shoulder as a hand runs up and down your side. You’re both gasping for breath, bodies pulsing and flushed hot, and it would be a beautiful moment if not for his sheer bulk making it hard to breathe.

“Hajime, get up,” you pant, and end up laughing when he scrambles up with an apologetic smile.

“Sorry. Forgot I’m so heavy.”

“It’s all the lumberjack muscles,” you joke before pausing. You shouldn’t be joking like this, not when you have to make a decision within the next day that will leave you heartbroken either way. “Do you want to shower first…?”

Iwaizumi looks positively confused when he answers, “We can shower together.”

“Wait, no!”

Why is it so embarrassing to think about?

“You can go first, I don’t mind.”

“Give me a break, we just slept together three times,” he grumbles good-naturedly, “I don’t know what else there is to hide.” Then he grins and it nearly takes your breath away. “Afterwards, I’ll take you to town to see Mattsun and Makki.”

You want to deny him, tell him that it would be better to do it alone, but then he kisses you one more time and you forget all about it. The shower is warm, but Iwaizumi’s hands on your body are even warmer, but maybe that’s because of the way it feels so domestic. He washes your back, you wash his hair, and in between you share a few kisses that certainly mean more than what your muddled relationship status is.

Iwaizumi steps out first, giving you time to stand beneath the warm stream of water. You stand there for a short while, your entire mind blank. You know you need to do something—talk to him, make a decision, go home—but everything is so overwhelming. You’re so used to having a plan, just like you always did. School, work, busting ass to get to the top at your job. You had always had something to work for, some kind of road map to get to where you wanted to be. But whatever this is with Iwaizumi is uncharted territory for you, enough that your hands are shaking when you turn off the faucet.

Before you can even exit, there’s a knock on the door, and Iwaizumi peeks in, looking annoyed.

“Hey.”

“What’s the matter?”

“Fukunaga asked me to drive him to the city to get an ingredient he’s missing. Apparently he can’t find it here.” Iwaizumi scratches the back of his head, looking sheepish as he leans against the doorframe. “I know I said I’d take you to see Mattsun and Makki, but…”

“It’s okay!” You respond a little too quickly, grabbing a towel to wrap around yourself. “Really. I can go see them myself.”

“You sure?”

You nod a few times, like you’re trying to both convince yourself and him that it’s okay. Iwaizumi nods with an exhale, checking his phone one more time before glancing back.

“I’ll be back as soon as I can then. See you at the cafe?”

You nod your answer again, afraid that opening your mouth will make everything come tumbling out. Maybe talking to Mattsun and Makki will help sort out your feelings and give you the courage to talk to Iwaizumi. You hear him walk over to the door, his shoes shuffling out to the graveled parking area, and then his truck roars to life. You wait until he’s gone to slump against the sink, holding onto tightly to the counter.

The last few days have been a whirlwind, and the silence that lingers now feels oppressive. You try to keep busy by drying off, putting on clothes, packing your things and setting them in your car, but nothing helps. Iwaizumi’s ghost lingers everywhere, enough that it makes a headache form. So you’re in your car the next moment, heading toward the cafe you promised to meet Iwaizumi at.

When you get there, you can see Futakuchi, Mattsun, and Makki through the window. The cafe owner is telling a story as Makki laughs at it, engrossed in his phone like usual. Mattsun looks over, chuckles about something, then elbows his friend. Makki looks offended, shaking his head and arguing, while the other two laugh.

It’s a wonderful moment for them, and a bitter reminder for you.

These aren’t your friends. They have long ties, plenty of memories, and a connection to each other that goes way back. You have a few meetings, one drunken night of embarrassment, and that’s it. That’s the thought that keeps you rooted to your seat, watching the three men laugh with each other.

There’s a vibration in your pocket that snaps you out of your self-deprecating thoughts, and you check it to see another headache. Your co-workers name blazes back at you, a reminder that tomorrow is your last day of freedom before working again.

You pick it up after swallowing your sigh. “Hello?”

“Hey, sorry to bug you.”

No, you’re not, you want to answer but keep silent. You never would have talked to her like this before, but something about your mood is sour now thanks to the situation.

“It’s fine. What’s wrong?”

“That interview you did with the Instagram influencer. I, uh… accidentally deleted the file? But it has to go out by tomorrow morning. Do you have a copy?”

“On my computer.”

She sighs happily. “Perfect! Can you send it to me?”

“No, I’m not in town. My computer’s at my house.”

You can practically hear her sob through the phone. “God, our boss is going to kill me. I’m so screwed. Is there any way you can get it?”

You sigh, setting your head down on the steering wheel. This is how it’s always been: you fixing for other people’s mistakes, giving in to their pleading and picking up their slack for them. That’s the reason you haven’t been able to have a vacation in years—and even on your first vacation away, you’re still cut short with shit that isn’t your fault.

“Um.”

“Please!” She pleads desperately. “Please, I’m begging. I’ll make it up to you, I promise!”

They never do. Two weeks away from the office has allowed you to see that clearly. You glance back up, staring at Iwaizumi’s friends laughing in the cafe, a cold shiver running down your back. It feels like you don’t belong anywhere—not inside with the men, not at your workplace anymore. No matter where you are, it feels so lonely. Iwaizumi is the only person to have made you feel differently, but yet here you are, still on the outside of his life, looking through the glass without an easy way inside.

“...Okay,” you eventually answer, your heart sinking at your co-worker’s relieved sigh. “I’ll e-mail it to you in a few hours.”

“Perfect! You’re a lifesaver. When you come in tomorrow, we can—”

“I’m not coming in tomorrow,” you remind her quickly, annoyance beginning to creep into your tone. “I still have one more day of my vacation.”

“Yeah, but—”

“Release the interview as scheduled,” you cut in again. “I already did everything anyway, it’s ready, so there should be no issues or reason to call me.”

“Alright, alright,” your co-worker grumbles. “Touchy.”

You don’t even bother giving her a response. You end the call without saying goodbye, throwing the phone into the passenger’s seat to be forgotten. Is this what you’re going back to? More stress, more headaches, more work? You glance behind you in the rear-view mirror. You can’t see it, but even the thought of Iwaizumi’s cabin gives you another headache.

It’s all too much. You need space.

Without saying goodbye to the three of them, you set the car in reverse and slowly drive away.

You don’t look at it, but your cell phone looms in your peripheral vision anyway, begging to be used. You have Iwaizumi’s number from the rental—you should call him and tell him you’re leaving. Tell him what the last two weeks meant to you before going. Promise that you’ll come back soon, because you want to see him again, because he means so much to you already. But then a lingering feeling eats away at your confidence. What if he doesn’t reciprocate? What if it was just something fun for him, to help him get over Oikawa and get Oikawa out of his life for good? You don’t think he would do that, but honestly, you don’t really know him well, do you?

Iwaizumi’s cabin approaches, and you hit the brakes to slow down even more. Should you wait for him? Go back to the cafe and forget about your coworker? Is leaving like this the right decision? It will be dark soon, meaning there’s not much time left to make a decision. Shakily, you get out of the car, the key to the cabin tight in your hand. You stare at the “Welcome!” mat in front of the doorway for a few minutes, before slowly bending down and setting the key underneath.

It’s better this way, you think as you turn back to your car and don’t look back.

But that doesn’t stop the tears from slipping down your cheeks the second Iwaizumi’s cabin is swallowed by the thick trees, becoming only a memory you’ll never forget.

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