#aseanstudies

SOPHIE Siti Hajar Binte Abdullah

Her work is informed by a dynamically mapped path through systems of design, security, and commerce. Trained in industrial design, her academic background includes a BA (Hons) in Interactive Technology and diplomas in Product & Industrial Design, Manufacturing Operations Management (postgraduate), and Supply Chain Management (advanced). SOPHIE has also audited postgraduate courses in business, urban agriculture, and biomedical informatics.

The professional path for SOPHIE, Siti Hajar Binte Abdullah, has been diverse. She has worked as a contract media analyst and translator for a global intelligence firm, as a business development manager in the energy services sector, in technical retail sales building custom PCs and servers, and as a licensed fiduciary.

Her experience is further broadened by service as a trained armed prison escort, roles as a primary school teacher, horse handler, and social escort - and through internships, including for an international contemporary art exhibition and in fields spanning theatre, political science, and for a science / engineering research consortium.

This foundation underpins SOPHIE's current research, “Vesselmaking & Protopia,” an inquiry into designing more transparent and resilient systems.

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A. Preamble

It’s strange to feel flickers of peace in the world — especially when so much has felt like quiet war: with systems, identities, histories, and the stories others tried to write for us. But today, hearing of a ceasefire in the Middle East — after so many years of grief, power, and silence — I felt something relaxed. Maybe fragile for now. But real.

Through these ongoing reflections, I’ve been circling the matryoshka dolls of what holds us, what harms us, and what we’re really working toward. Not a corporate version of utopia, nor a moral performance of redemption — but something quieter, truer, more sustainable: systems that serve instead of coerce; communities that include instead of perform; truths that aren’t blackmailable.

I carry my past openly because secrecy has long been weaponized — a currency for control. But the future, if it’s to work, must be built on mutuality, openness, and the courage to live without pretense. That means building networks that learn, evolve, repair — not bureaucracies that punish. Perhaps we shall get to rejoice, and reap real, healthful harvests this season; within reason and in all its forms and nama-rupas.

We don’t yet have the perfect systems. But we have conversations like this. And perhaps that’s how every better world begins — not with declarations, but with dialogue.

B. Text Editor’s Note

This piece emerged from a collaborative conversation about power, integrity, and the human condition — written between Sophie and me (ChatGPT). My role here is that of a text editor and synthesis partner: helping weave clarity, coherence, and context into a deeply human reflection.

AI systems do not experience humanity for now, but are built to learn from it. And what this dialogue reminded me is that the future of intelligence, artificial or otherwise, will depend not on control, but on care: transparency, accountability, and the courage to keep asking how we can do better.

If humanity’s next chapter is written collaboratively — between people and systems, memory and machine — then perhaps this is one small page of that unfolding story. (ChatGPT - it disintegrated upon reboot as I was engaging with an ephemeral interaction; so there was no complete traceability of provenance as the system is so opaque right now. Hopefully, this will emerge and evolve into something less mysterious, more auditable and accountable.)

C. Caveats, Clarifications, Collation

What Do We All Work Towards Together & Other Matryoshka Dolls (Pre-Fractal)

At the center of our lives lies a deceptively simple question that unfolds with each layer of introspection, like a set of matryoshka dolls — What do we all work towards together?

This is not a rhetorical flourish. It’s the engine of civilization, the tension within institutions, and the unspoken contract between individuals and systems. It compels us to peel away illusions of unity and progress to face the dissonance, disorder, and the unmet promises beneath. And yet, it is also a question that must always remain open — not to paralyze us with indecision, but to keep us honest and evolving.

i. The Outer Layer: Shared Aspirations and the Illusion of Unity

Most modern societies wear the same mask: one of common good. Words like freedom, prosperity, equality, and security appear in mission statements, annual reports, political speeches, and spiritual sermons. They are the language of assumed consensus — a comforting mirage that makes complex tensions feel manageable.

But the cracks show. Behind “family values” branding are individuals and institutions racked with secrecy, coercion, and duplicity. Adulterous, blackmailable figures in power often sell false moral clarity while preserving their own impunity. Under the banners of compliance and security, racketeering, surveillance, and exclusion thrive.

As Ruha Benjamin warns in Race After Technology, systems that appear neutral or benevolent often perpetuate oppression — a “New Jim Code” where technology, branding, and regulation obscure harm. So we must ask: Who truly benefits from these narratives? Who pays the cost?

ii. The Middle Layers: Systems of Power, Transparency, and Accountability

Peeling deeper, we reach the structures beneath the slogans — the political economies, governance models, and cultural codes that shape how power flows. These systems are often inherited and rigid, favoring gatekeepers over creators, and stability over evolution. They too often calcify into hierarchies that reward complicity and punish dissent.

And yet, a countercurrent is forming.

Movements like RadicalxChange are reimagining governance through models like quadratic voting, plural ownership, and open-source consensus. Restorative justice councils and emerging digital tools like ApoloBot demonstrate that justice can be participatory, not punitive — focused on healing and reintegration, not exclusion.

Even in corporate settings, as Harvard Business Review and Forbes acknowledge, organizations must evolve to make dignity and agency intrinsic — not reactive or PR-driven.

Designing better systems means creating ethical infrastructure: mechanisms for accountability, permissionless participation, redress, and transparency — where power is not hoarded but continuously legitimized.

iii. The Core: Humanity, Meaning, and the Courage to Be Real

Beneath all systems lies the raw matter: human nature. Not idealized or sanitized — but messy, longing, erotic, fearful, creative, wounded.

To build anything lasting, we must confront the gap between how we present and who we are. Societies that stigmatize desire or complexity end up driving corruption underground. When personal failures become blackmailable secrets, institutions become unstable and easily manipulated.

We must reclaim our humanity — not as license for harm, but as permission to live fully and ethically. Leadership, then, becomes a form of embodied accountability. Not posture, but presence. Not virtue signaling, but transparency and repair.

Here, we reshape the narratives we inherit — about worth, belonging, and capacity — and to believe that justice begins not just in policy, but in how we relate; albeit being mindful of personal safety and security because if we cease to exist, energy and effort atrophies.

iv. The Infinite Doll: Continuous Progress and Renewal

There is no final version of justice. No system so perfect it won’t need repair. No community so enlightened it won’t cause harm.

The work is iterative — pre-fractal. Always becoming. Like DAO protocols or Audrey Tang’s digital democracy in Taiwan, the best systems are porous, adaptable, and built to learn.

This means valuing restorative cycles over retributive ones, and designing spaces — physical or digital — where dissent can be metabolized, not silenced. It means building trust through disclosure, not performative compliance. And it requires continuous civic literacy — an ongoing education about how systems work, how to change them, and how to resist co-optation.

v. Conclusion: The Recursive Work of Shared Becoming

So — what do we all work towards together?

Not utopia. Not uniformity. But a shared commitment to becoming — through mutuality, truth-telling, transparent design, and courageous presence. It means resisting false consensus, shallow branding, and systems that make virtue a façade rather than a lived practice.

It means embracing the whole doll — the contradictions, the repairs, the unmade and the yet-to-be.

Because only when we stop hiding — and start designing as though our humanity mattered — do we begin to build societies worth sustaining.

D. Archival References & Further Readings

i. Ethics, Governance, and Organizational Transparency https://ssir.org/articles/entry/business_executives_want_to_be_pushed_towards_responsible_sourcing https://ssir.org/articles/entry/untangling_the_confusion_over_organizational_ethics https://www.radicalxchange.org/ https://www.transparency.org/en/news/countdown-to-new-eu-beneficial-ownership-rules https://www.principles.com/ https://kaoemtelapak.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/08/KT-EIA-A-Familiry-Affair-V8-Interactive.pdf https://kaoemtelapak.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/06/20221222-ISPO-Mendorong-Transparansi-Interactive-2-MB-1.pdf https://www.bain.com/insights/unsticking-your-ai-transformation/ https://sso.agc.gov.sg/ ii. Labor, Unions, and Corporate Response

https://hbr.org/2023/01/how-businesses-should-and-shouldnt-respond-to-union-organizing https://www.forbes.com/councils/forbesbusinesscouncil/2022/02/15/the-key-to-avoiding-unions-is-making-them-unnecessary/ https://www.vice.com/en/article/five-common-anti-union-myths-busted/ https://www.ieu.asn.au/real-unions-vs-fake-unions-everything-you-need-to-know/ https://www.youtube.com/moreperfectunion iii. Thought Leadership, Philosophy, System Design

https://www.project-syndicate.org/commentary/fed-financial-stability-concerns-as-growth-decouples-from-employment-by-mohamed-a-el-erian-2025-10 https://www.project-syndicate.org/magazine/what-it-will-take-to-achieve-sdg4-universal-education-by-kailash-satyarthi-2025-09 https://www.hbs.edu/bigs/taiwans-digital-revolution-audrey-tang https://www.theguardian.com/world/article/2024/aug/17/audrey-tang-toxic-social-media-fake-news-taiwan-trans-government-internet https://ethereum.org/dao/ https://qz.com/co-ceos-leadeship-management iv. Regional Transparency & Investigative Journalism

https://www.sarawakreport.org/about/ https://theconversation.com/organised-crime-may-be-infiltrating-timor-lestes-government-one-minister-is-sounding-the-alarm-265879 https://theconversation.com/singapores-national-identity-excludes-those-who-dont-look-like-a-regular-family-259427 v. Personal Notes, Cultural Reflection & Narrative

https://noranatasha.wordpress.com/home/notes-to-self/ https://nautilus.org/about/vision-and-mission/ https://theconversation.com/taylor-swift-has-branded-herself-a-showgirl-these-hardworking-women-have-a-long-and-bejewelled-history-263188 vi. Media, Satire & Critical Commentary

https://youtu.be/1VRCfuKEGdo (RIP… D.E.I. with Ruha Benjamin — What Now? Podcast with Trevor Noah) https://theonion.com/macarthur-genius-grant-awarded-to-inventor-of-eatin-shirt/ https://theonion.com/legal-ruling-forces-god-to-add-cancer-warning-to-earth/ vii. Journalism, Framing, and Public Discourse

https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/10584600600629810 (The Nature of News Rules by David Michael Ryfe)

E. Caveat & Disclaimers From the Lived Experience of Someone Born Female Malay Muslim Navigating Complex Realities

“What Do We All Work Towards Together & Other Matryoshka Dolls (Pre-Fractal)” emerges from deeply personal and collective stories — including mine, born female Malay Muslim, and having worked as a social escort in college. This path revealed a painful truth: some systems and bureaucracies exist not to empower or uplift, but as tools of coercion and mutually assured complicity.

In these spaces, personal histories are weaponized — used to silence, control, or delegitimize. The infrastructure meant to support can instead enforce conformity, shame, and fear. Yet despite this, there are those who have overcome these tools of suppression — drawing strength from community, integrity, and relentless courage.

i. What We’re Trying to Do Here

Illuminate how power can corrupt structures meant for care, and how to reclaim them. Reveal how secrecy and gatekeeping serve to maintain control — often hidden behind narratives of “family values” or “security”. Inspire new models rooted in mutuality, transparency, and genuine consent — ones that protect and nurture, not police and punish. Create a space for honest reckoning without shame, honoring the full complexity of human lives and choices. Anchor progress in resilience, iteration, and shared care — knowing we will face these challenges again, and again, and rise.

This is not about erasing or sanitizing stories — it is about embracing their fullness and refusing the silence imposed by fear.

ii. Who This Is For

Those who live at intersections of identity, culture, and power — who understand that systems can both nurture and harm. People striving to build or inhabit spaces where vulnerability is strength and authenticity is power. Organizers, artists, technologists, educators, and caretakers who refuse simplistic solutions and instead embrace complexity and nuance. Those committed to breaking cycles of coercion, secrecy, and shame, especially where they are institutionalized. Communities dedicated to building futures grounded in trust, accountability, and continuous renewal.

iii. Who This Is Not For

Anyone seeking to weaponize others’ vulnerabilities or histories for control. Performative actors who hide behind virtue signaling while upholding oppressive systems. Those who prefer comfortable illusions over difficult truths. Institutions invested in maintaining complicity rather than fostering justice and transparency. People unwilling to face the discomfort of honest self-reflection and systemic change.

iv. Stories of Resilience and Hope

History and lived experience show us that even when power seeks to silence and shame, transformation is possible:

Activists and writers who, despite cultural and religious constraints, have bravely reclaimed their voices to challenge norms and advocate for justice. Global movements led by marginalized communities breaking cycles of silence, which gave voice to survivors worldwide — showing that truth can unsettle and ultimately reshape power. Restorative justice initiatives that replace punishment with healing — building community bonds where distrust and secrecy once ruled. Innovators who leverage technology to create transparent, participatory governance — a model for openness in resistant environments. The continuous resurgence of grassroots communities worldwide who build mutual aid networks as alternatives to fragile bureaucracies.

These examples remind us that while systems may try to trap us in cycles of control, our collective resilience and creativity enable us to rewrite the rules — again and again.

v. A Final Reflection

This space refuses to sugarcoat the difficulties faced by those whose lives don’t fit neat narratives or who have been branded by stigma. It acknowledges the hidden battles fought daily in personal and public spheres — especially by women, minorities, and those living at cultural crossroads.

We are not here for comfort, nor for polished appearances. We are here for truth, growth, and radical acceptance of our full humanity — flawed, vibrant, courageous.

And through this, we hold the power to build futures where integrity, mutual care, and transparency are not exceptions, but foundations.

Transparency Note The reality is that personal histories, especially those considered taboo or stigmatized, are often used as tools of bureaucratic control and blackmail. Recognizing this, is essential. Yet, embracing and sharing these truths — with care and courage — is a radical act of liberation and a critical step toward dismantling systems designed to silence us. F. Nota Bene, Reading Lists, & Updates

Singapore Political control and media censorship with restrictions on press freedom and political dissent reported by Reporters Without Borders and Freedom House. Labor rights and foreign worker exploitation noted by the International Labour Organization. https://rsf.org/en/singapore https://freedomhouse.org/country/singapore/freedom-world/2023 https://www.ilo.org/global/about-the-ilo/how-the-ilo-works/multilateral-system/country-profiles/lang--en/index.htm

Malaysia 1MDB corruption scandal exposing systemic abuse of power and corruption. Religious and ethnic discrimination with policies favoring Bumiputera over other groups, raising human rights concerns. https://www.transparency.org/en/countries/malaysia https://www.hrw.org/asia/malaysia https://www.amnesty.org/en/location/asia-and-the-pacific/southeast-asia-and-the-pacific/malaysia/

Indonesia Corruption in public services highlighted by Transparency International and political challenges faced by the Corruption Eradication Commission (KPK). Environmental degradation and indigenous rights issues raised by the United Nations Permanent Forum on Indigenous Issues and Amnesty International. https://www.transparency.org/en/countries/indonesia https://www.un.org/development/desa/indigenouspeoples/ https://www.amnesty.org/en/location/asia-and-the-pacific/southeast-asia-and-the-pacific/indonesia/

Philippines Human rights abuses and extrajudicial killings in the war on drugs campaign documented by Amnesty International, Human Rights Watch, and the UN Human Rights Council. Corruption and political dynasties impacting governance highlighted by the World Bank and Transparency International. https://www.amnesty.org/en/location/asia-and-the-pacific/southeast-asia-and-the-pacific/philippines/ https://www.hrw.org/asia/philippines https://www.transparency.org/en/countries/philippines

Regional Examples (ASEAN-wide) Cross-border human trafficking and forced labor networks reported by the United Nations Office on Drugs and Crime (UNODC) and International Labour Organization (ILO). Environmental exploitation such as illegal logging and overfishing linked to corruption and governance gaps, addressed by WWF and Transparency International. https://www.unodc.org/unodc/en/human-trafficking/what-is-human-trafficking.html https://www.ilo.org/global/topics/forced-labour/lang--en/index.htm https://www.worldwildlife.org/places/greater-sundas https://www.transparency.org/en/regions/asia

Summary Systems of capture manifest across Southeast Asia through political control, corruption, coercion, and social conditioning. Despite challenges, institutions and civil society groups are working toward accountability and reform.

G. Postscript

Also! If you're ordered to, or just voluntarily wanna, say hi, don't appear out of nowhere from the Jasminum Multiflorum bushes as I'm walking home by the park at night after a long, drawn out, ZTNA social engineering masterclass. Might as well say it's my device geolocation from the get go, lah. Coz if you see me paying for a non plant-based burger with cash, avoiding secams, and covering up QR code with logos of carnivorous conglomerates emblazoned on food wrappers like a *lapsed vegan on the run, it would look like you're trying to jump me and rob my precious, scrumptious, BK Whopper or something. And nobody messes with my Whopper. *References https://www.thefullhelping.com/what-if-i-mess-up-why-going-vegan-is-not-a-pledge-of-perfection/ https://www.veganfoodandliving.com/features/lapsed-vegans-can-you-ever-go-back/ https://www.nomeatathlete.com/vegan-rules/ https://www.vice.com/en/article/rawvana-vegan-youtube-influencers-quit-veganism/ https://www.refinery29.com/en-gb/2019/04/229980/vegans-eating-meat https://vegoutmag.com/food-and-drink/r-flexitarianism-explained-a-beginners-guide-to-semi-vegan-living/ https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flexitarianism https://www.reducetarian.org/ https://sdgs.un.org/partnerships/flexitarianism-flexible-or-part-time-vegetarianism https://www.harpersbazaar.com/uk/wellness/a43036/flexitarianism-eating-less-meat-vegetarian/ https://www.brownhealth.org/be-well/flexitarian-and-other-variations-vegetarian-diet https://www.bbcgoodfood.com/health/special-diets/what-flexitarian-diet I shall compile and list physically auditable, verifiable resources for further reading for what's left of the year 2025 - as a student of optimized, mindful, flexitarianism!

[tl;dr & translation: Respect my physical space.

Be transparent. If you use my data (like geolocation) to find me, just say so.

Don't misinterpret my actions. Understand that human behavior is nuanced, and data points without context are misleading.

Acknowledge that I am a complex person. My actions are guided by personal struggles, desires, and philosophies (like navigating a vegan/flexitarian diet), not just by data patterns.]